(Edited to correct sorting error!)
Before we get to the rankings, the committee has a few announcements.
ANNOUNCEMENT #1: Welcome to the newest member of the committee, the infallible android TSE2000.
All of you should be at least vaguely familiar (courtesy of the Terminator movies and the Sarah Connor Chronicles TV show) with SkyNet and their ultimate killing machine, T2000. However, you are less likely to be familiar with SkyNet's first creation, the singularly logical truth machine, TSE2000. TSE2000 was designed to fill a need as the most logical being on the planet. It was a also implanted with a microchip that prevents it from telling any lies whatsoever. Luckily for the committee, the geniuses at SkyNet had concerns about moral gray areas or other situations where honesty might not be the best policy, so the TSE2000 was also implanted with a chip that allows it to be "intentionally obtuse" when such situations arise.
Anyway, now that you have been introduced, please welcome TSE2000 to our esteemed committee.
ANNOUNCEMENT #2: In GLB, as in life, conditions are ever-changing. With this in mind, and in an effort to keep up with the latest trends, the Power Rankings Committee has added an open-door policy. Essentially this policy allows for "spur-of-the-moment" contributions from non- committee members. These contributions will be identified as BREAKING NEWS henceforth.
ANNOUNCEMENT #3: After an intense week of training, Pseudo Jed now appears to comprehend both the definition and purpose of Power Rankings. He still occasionally refers to them as corn, but he did not try to eat jrry7's submission this time.
ANNOUNCEMENT #4: As you might have noticed above, jrry30 will henceforth be given numbers of the best UGA players, present and past, rather than his chosen number... this is a continuation of the decision made last week.
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OK, with the announcements out of the way, and without further adieu, YOUR Week 4 Power Rankings (with comments, where provided by committee members or ad hoc guests)...
1 Kalamazoo Coyotes 4-0-0
CTap says, "Kzoo scoring TDs instead of FGs has to be a scary proposition for the rest of the Eastern Conference."
2 Bourbon Street Bullies 4-0-0
Pseudo Jed says, "Corn rankings better than Power Rankings if stupid West team now #2. For me, it tough decision between BSB and Sparta for #16 in all Power Rankings, or Corn Rankings! Grrrr!"
Jrry8 says something, but I find it utterly ridiculous.
3 Philadelphia Pushovers 4-0-0
jrry22 says, "Beat the Red Wolves big but can the Pushovers win where it matters...in the playoffs? Supposedly when the word playoffs is mentioned Jed curls up in a ball and starts crying."
In response, Pseudo Jed says, "Grrr! Even with all players on ground, curled up and crying, Philly would beat all Western Conference teams combined by 40 points. Grrrr!"
4 Detroit Demon Lions 4-0-0
TSE2000 says, "Engaging intentionally obtuse mode. By my 100% accurate calculations, this team, which is both boosted and at the same time unboosted, has a 3.125% chance of winning the league in Season 4. Note, this calculation carries a margin of error of +/- 96.875%. Thank you for your time, even though it was I who honored you with my presence."
jrry47 added, "Had another impressive win over the Nasty but TSE has never released whether or not he has a butt for a face? I am very intrigued by this...where does he poop from and if he gives oral is he getting anal? Also did his parents have butts for faces? TSE gives us the low down man!"
BREAKING NEWS: Upon reading jrry3's comments, TSE2000 immediately sought out a T2000 in in an apparent android suicide mission. It's failure to disengage "intentionally obtuse mode" has led to its apparent destruction. SkyNet had no comment.
5 San Antonio Saints 4-0-0
jrry13 attempts to spark up a controversy when he says, "The Saints beat up on a faltering Tecmo team but this game was more like Joe Frazier fighting a 5th grader. There have been rumors of a scandal on the Saints...are these rumors true and what is the scandal?"
BREAKING NEWS: Apparently Pseudo Jed has identified the source of the scandal... wait, nope, he thought a scandal was a type of corn. Nothing to see here.
6 Chicago Mustangs 3-1-0
jrry3 says something about me and Harper being partners, or "in cahoots" since I care so little about his lame challenge to Harper that I refused to include it last week.
BREAKING NEWS: I don't know Tim Harper. However, given what little I do know about him, I don't much like him. Of course, this goes for 90% of you. (Technically, if TSE2000 were still around to correct me, it would apply to 87.268% of you!)
7 Minnesota Marauders 4-0-0
jrry47 says, "Now that Galk has brought Big T to the dark side...is there anyone who can stand in the way of the Marauders? Or will they fizzle out just like the Vikings?"
BREAKING NEWS: jrry47's lame attempts at humor have the rest of the committee contemplating following TSE2000's example...
8 Detroit Dump Trucks 3-1-0
CTap says, "Enigma isn't even the word to describe this team."
jrry14's jokes get worse and worse at this point, so I contemplate not including any more of his comments. The 2 of you who haven't quit reading by now should thank me for this!
9 Boston Nighthawks 4-0-0
jrry48 says, "Again they get this spot because they are undefeated but the Nighthawks schedule is softer than Andrew Vick."
BREAKING NEWS: Before even contributing a single comment, Pseudo Bolstersam has quit the committee due to the "mean comments directed at a Mustangs player". Apparently Pseudo Bolstersam is even easier to offend into quitting Power Rankings than his real-life counterpart.
10 Las Vegas Freebirds 3-1-0
11 Detroit Nasty 2-2-0
12 Golden State Athletics 2-2-0
13 Dayton Brute Squad 3-1-0
14 Kailua Daggers 2-2-0
CTap says, "2 down, 4 more to go... 6 losses in a row, you heard it here first."
Pseudo Jed says, "How more West teams get in top 16 of Power Rankings? Other committee members must still be doing corn rankings. Grrr! Why noone tell me? Grrrr!"
15 Galaxy Aces 2-2-0
CTap says, "Ouch! Getting dominated by Oakland should get you a spot somewhere in the top 32, but outside the top 29 IMO."
16 Washington Bullets 3-1-0
17 San Jose Spartans 1-3-0
CTap says, "No longer are they the best winless team in GLB. Now that distinction goes to Galaxy Aces - they are winless right?"
18 Gridiron Rage 2-2-0
19 D.C. Warpath 1-3-0
CTap says, "Which is worse, Hogglife's team or his lame attempts at trash talk?"
BREAKING NEWS: Pseudo Shagg shows up and answers for us. "The answer to this question is Supernovas have the levels and are now going to be a playoff team in season 4." Sorry Pseudo Shagg, I didn't ask what the best running joke in GLB today was...
20 Saginaw Supernovas 1-3-0
21 Columbus Bucks 2-2-0
22 Washington Extreme 0-4-0
BREAKING NEWS: Upon further review, the Extreme boosting to turn around their season is the best running joke in GLB today. Sorry, Pseudo Shagg, you almost got it correct.
23 Rhode Island Red Wolves 1-3-0
24 Kansas Warriors 1-3-0
25 Kentucky Wildcats 1-3-0
26 Oakland Intimidators 1-3-0
CTap says, "Are they getting their act together or are Aces just overrated? Probably a bit of both. We'll see I guess."
Pseudo Jed says, "Grrr! They in West, I rank them tie for 33 in Power Ranking. Grrr!"
27 Sacramento SaberCats 2-2-0
jrry24 says, "The Sabercats won 2 games and will probably not get relegated. Auris did this comment make you happy?"
CTap says, "Hi Xenetha."
28 Denver Globetrotters 0-4-0
29 Tecmo SuperBowlers 0-4-0
CTap says, "Can gutting be far off?"
BREAKING NEWS: Gutting to occur in a couple of days. Called it!
30 Camden Outkasts 0-4-0
31 Miami Bulldogs 0-4-0
32 Sparta Wardogs 0-4-0
CTap says, "OK I was wrong, they could NOT compete for a playoff spot in USA BBB."
Pseudo Jed responds, "I finish Power Rankings. BSB rank #17, just behind Sparta."
(Special thanks to jrry24, tpaterniti, and Galkuris for again contributing rankings.)
Before we get to the rankings, the committee has a few announcements.
ANNOUNCEMENT #1: Welcome to the newest member of the committee, the infallible android TSE2000.
All of you should be at least vaguely familiar (courtesy of the Terminator movies and the Sarah Connor Chronicles TV show) with SkyNet and their ultimate killing machine, T2000. However, you are less likely to be familiar with SkyNet's first creation, the singularly logical truth machine, TSE2000. TSE2000 was designed to fill a need as the most logical being on the planet. It was a also implanted with a microchip that prevents it from telling any lies whatsoever. Luckily for the committee, the geniuses at SkyNet had concerns about moral gray areas or other situations where honesty might not be the best policy, so the TSE2000 was also implanted with a chip that allows it to be "intentionally obtuse" when such situations arise.
Anyway, now that you have been introduced, please welcome TSE2000 to our esteemed committee.
ANNOUNCEMENT #2: In GLB, as in life, conditions are ever-changing. With this in mind, and in an effort to keep up with the latest trends, the Power Rankings Committee has added an open-door policy. Essentially this policy allows for "spur-of-the-moment" contributions from non- committee members. These contributions will be identified as BREAKING NEWS henceforth.
ANNOUNCEMENT #3: After an intense week of training, Pseudo Jed now appears to comprehend both the definition and purpose of Power Rankings. He still occasionally refers to them as corn, but he did not try to eat jrry7's submission this time.
ANNOUNCEMENT #4: As you might have noticed above, jrry30 will henceforth be given numbers of the best UGA players, present and past, rather than his chosen number... this is a continuation of the decision made last week.
-----------------------------------------------------------
OK, with the announcements out of the way, and without further adieu, YOUR Week 4 Power Rankings (with comments, where provided by committee members or ad hoc guests)...
1 Kalamazoo Coyotes 4-0-0
CTap says, "Kzoo scoring TDs instead of FGs has to be a scary proposition for the rest of the Eastern Conference."
2 Bourbon Street Bullies 4-0-0
Pseudo Jed says, "Corn rankings better than Power Rankings if stupid West team now #2. For me, it tough decision between BSB and Sparta for #16 in all Power Rankings, or Corn Rankings! Grrrr!"
Jrry8 says something, but I find it utterly ridiculous.
3 Philadelphia Pushovers 4-0-0
jrry22 says, "Beat the Red Wolves big but can the Pushovers win where it matters...in the playoffs? Supposedly when the word playoffs is mentioned Jed curls up in a ball and starts crying."
In response, Pseudo Jed says, "Grrr! Even with all players on ground, curled up and crying, Philly would beat all Western Conference teams combined by 40 points. Grrrr!"
4 Detroit Demon Lions 4-0-0
TSE2000 says, "Engaging intentionally obtuse mode. By my 100% accurate calculations, this team, which is both boosted and at the same time unboosted, has a 3.125% chance of winning the league in Season 4. Note, this calculation carries a margin of error of +/- 96.875%. Thank you for your time, even though it was I who honored you with my presence."
jrry47 added, "Had another impressive win over the Nasty but TSE has never released whether or not he has a butt for a face? I am very intrigued by this...where does he poop from and if he gives oral is he getting anal? Also did his parents have butts for faces? TSE gives us the low down man!"
BREAKING NEWS: Upon reading jrry3's comments, TSE2000 immediately sought out a T2000 in in an apparent android suicide mission. It's failure to disengage "intentionally obtuse mode" has led to its apparent destruction. SkyNet had no comment.
5 San Antonio Saints 4-0-0
jrry13 attempts to spark up a controversy when he says, "The Saints beat up on a faltering Tecmo team but this game was more like Joe Frazier fighting a 5th grader. There have been rumors of a scandal on the Saints...are these rumors true and what is the scandal?"
BREAKING NEWS: Apparently Pseudo Jed has identified the source of the scandal... wait, nope, he thought a scandal was a type of corn. Nothing to see here.
6 Chicago Mustangs 3-1-0
jrry3 says something about me and Harper being partners, or "in cahoots" since I care so little about his lame challenge to Harper that I refused to include it last week.
BREAKING NEWS: I don't know Tim Harper. However, given what little I do know about him, I don't much like him. Of course, this goes for 90% of you. (Technically, if TSE2000 were still around to correct me, it would apply to 87.268% of you!)
7 Minnesota Marauders 4-0-0
jrry47 says, "Now that Galk has brought Big T to the dark side...is there anyone who can stand in the way of the Marauders? Or will they fizzle out just like the Vikings?"
BREAKING NEWS: jrry47's lame attempts at humor have the rest of the committee contemplating following TSE2000's example...
8 Detroit Dump Trucks 3-1-0
CTap says, "Enigma isn't even the word to describe this team."
jrry14's jokes get worse and worse at this point, so I contemplate not including any more of his comments. The 2 of you who haven't quit reading by now should thank me for this!
9 Boston Nighthawks 4-0-0
jrry48 says, "Again they get this spot because they are undefeated but the Nighthawks schedule is softer than Andrew Vick."
BREAKING NEWS: Before even contributing a single comment, Pseudo Bolstersam has quit the committee due to the "mean comments directed at a Mustangs player". Apparently Pseudo Bolstersam is even easier to offend into quitting Power Rankings than his real-life counterpart.
10 Las Vegas Freebirds 3-1-0
11 Detroit Nasty 2-2-0
12 Golden State Athletics 2-2-0
13 Dayton Brute Squad 3-1-0
14 Kailua Daggers 2-2-0
CTap says, "2 down, 4 more to go... 6 losses in a row, you heard it here first."
Pseudo Jed says, "How more West teams get in top 16 of Power Rankings? Other committee members must still be doing corn rankings. Grrr! Why noone tell me? Grrrr!"
15 Galaxy Aces 2-2-0
CTap says, "Ouch! Getting dominated by Oakland should get you a spot somewhere in the top 32, but outside the top 29 IMO."
16 Washington Bullets 3-1-0
17 San Jose Spartans 1-3-0
CTap says, "No longer are they the best winless team in GLB. Now that distinction goes to Galaxy Aces - they are winless right?"
18 Gridiron Rage 2-2-0
19 D.C. Warpath 1-3-0
CTap says, "Which is worse, Hogglife's team or his lame attempts at trash talk?"
BREAKING NEWS: Pseudo Shagg shows up and answers for us. "The answer to this question is Supernovas have the levels and are now going to be a playoff team in season 4." Sorry Pseudo Shagg, I didn't ask what the best running joke in GLB today was...
20 Saginaw Supernovas 1-3-0
21 Columbus Bucks 2-2-0
22 Washington Extreme 0-4-0
BREAKING NEWS: Upon further review, the Extreme boosting to turn around their season is the best running joke in GLB today. Sorry, Pseudo Shagg, you almost got it correct.
23 Rhode Island Red Wolves 1-3-0
24 Kansas Warriors 1-3-0
25 Kentucky Wildcats 1-3-0
26 Oakland Intimidators 1-3-0
CTap says, "Are they getting their act together or are Aces just overrated? Probably a bit of both. We'll see I guess."
Pseudo Jed says, "Grrr! They in West, I rank them tie for 33 in Power Ranking. Grrr!"
27 Sacramento SaberCats 2-2-0
jrry24 says, "The Sabercats won 2 games and will probably not get relegated. Auris did this comment make you happy?"
CTap says, "Hi Xenetha."
28 Denver Globetrotters 0-4-0
29 Tecmo SuperBowlers 0-4-0
CTap says, "Can gutting be far off?"
BREAKING NEWS: Gutting to occur in a couple of days. Called it!
30 Camden Outkasts 0-4-0
31 Miami Bulldogs 0-4-0
32 Sparta Wardogs 0-4-0
CTap says, "OK I was wrong, they could NOT compete for a playoff spot in USA BBB."
Pseudo Jed responds, "I finish Power Rankings. BSB rank #17, just behind Sparta."
(Special thanks to jrry24, tpaterniti, and Galkuris for again contributing rankings.)
Last edited Aug 10, 2008 12:19:21
