The Capital Times
Volume 2, Issue 2
Explanatory Note – The following analysis has been compiled by the Society for the Advancement of Dotball Research (SADR), and is based on the most rigorous and painstaking statistical research yet conducted in Dotlandia. As such, we are confident in its authenticity and veracity. As always, however, caution should be exercised while drawing conclusions and, certainly, under no circumstances will SADR be liable for any dumb bets you place, based on our findings.
Sadermetrics Released
Thank you for purchasing your copy of The Capital Times – boasting the sharpest-dressed reporters in all fake media.
The Society for the Advancement of Dotball Research (SADR) released their pre-season metrics earlier this week, and dots across the land were eager to parse their findings, in advance of the inaugural season in the post-Champion League format. The Capital Times is a fan of Pwned’s early pre-season prognostications, and will therefore follow Pwned’s lead in order of reporting. Without further adieu, we begin our analysis…
Orlando Prime Timers
The Prime Timers may still be drunk after celebrating their second consecutive championship in Dot Bowl CVIII. But they’ll have to put the coffee on and shake off the cobwebs if they want to keep the streak alive in 109, as the new format promises an exciting and unpredictable competitive landscape.
Fortunately for Orlando, they have perhaps the most famous play-caller in all of GLB lore coordinating their games in RyanCane26. Widely respected for his prowess as a game-planner, RC will have several superstars at his disposal, not least of which is quarterback Jaylen Leslie, who threw for 6,238 yards and 50 touchdowns last season, completing over 70 percent of all pass attempts. Complementing Leslie’s aerial attack will be all-star power back, Bo Jackson, who rushed for just shy of 1,000 yards last season, busting 119 tackles and knocking out 214 teeth along the way.
Orlando is determined to keep the streak alive, but will have a target on their backs as the new season begins. It’s hard to win. Harder to repeat. To three-peat… is divine.
Cherokee Nation
Cherokee Nation entered Dot Bowl CVIII as something of a dark horse, having finished their regular season as the 4th-seed underdog with a rather uninspiring 6-10 regular season record. (Fans of our beloved Capital Ravens will note, our hometown favorites finished season 108 with an equivalent record and yet failed to qualify for the post-season.) But Cherokee proved the old adage: Make it to the post-season dance and anything is possible. They surprised the conference leading Florida Frenzy in the first round, before romping their way through the rest of the conference to contend in Dot Bowl CVIII. Alas for the Nation, the clock struck midnight on their dream run as the Prime Timers bested them in the big game.
But the future of this team is intriguing. Quarterback Jim Plunkett threw for almost 3,000 yards last season and the Nation boasted not one, but two running backs who carried the rock for over a thousand yards each – Power back Larry Czonka and his kid brother, Earl Campball, who rushed for 1,471 and 1,055 yards, respectively. Meanwhile, on defense, cornerback Hanford Dixon lead the league with an impressive 13 interceptions.
Will season 109 be their season to dethrone the reigning champs? If season 108 is anything to go by, you can’t count the Nation out.
Asau Golden Eagles
The second of RC’s Pro League teams, Asau is no stranger to post season glory, having sipped the sweet champagne of victory no fewer than 6 times, the most recent being a thrilling come-from-behind victory over the Brothers in Arms in Dot Bowl CVI following a highlight reel pass from Teddy Holloway to Ollie Lofton with under two minutes to play: https://glb.warriorgeneral.com/game/replay.pl?game_id=34533&pbp_id=920841 .
The Eagles finished season 108 in the 2nd seed of their conference with an impressive 11-and-5 record, and showed every sign of carrying their momentum into the Dot Bowl before dropping the conference final to the surprising 6-and-10 upstarts, Cherokee Nation. Will the sting of defeat sharpen the Eagles’ focus? History suggests yes. But the squad may be suffering from the divided attentions of their mastermind coordinator RyanCanes, who will be managing no fewer than 4 Pro League squads next season. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JlmucnEgKfI
Tempe Venom
A non-network team, Tempe finished last regular season atop their conference with (what your faithful correspondent is quickly coming to realize was not a terribly remarkable) 11-and-5 record. Seems parity was a real thing in the last season of the Champion League! The Venom defeated the Jersey Showboats in the opening round before falling to the eventual champs in the Conference Final by a score of 16-31.
The Venom is an interesting squad, largely inflicting their damage through a precision aerial attack led by the prolific (if not so creatively named) pivot, ‘QB - 1’, who passed for 5,200 yards and 37 touchdowns. Can a pass-happy offense lead Tempe to the promised land in 109?
Florida Frenzy
Third of the Pro League teams with RyanCane’s hand on the tiller, the Frenzy is another storied franchise with its fingerprints all over the LomBorti Trophy, having won the championship 6 times. Season 108 was not one of them, however. The Frenzy finished their regular season atop their conference but were shocked by a first-round upset at the hands of Cherokee Nation.
Upset aside, Florida commands respect. Pivot Ken Anderson completed 460 passes for over 5,300 yards and 43 touchdowns while power back Marcus Allen lowered the shoulder and romped his way to another thousand-yards-rushing season (his 6th consecutive). Don’t count Florida out.
C-Town MF’n Hood
The influencers behind Goal Line Blitz’s most popular line of underwear, the C-Town MF’n Hood is a ‘punch-in-the-mouth’ squad that finished last season with a winning 10-and-6 record. They fell to the eventual champs Orlando Prime Timers in the first round, but the affair was a tight one, with Orlando needing a 5th-frame to finally seal the deal.
The Hood’s attack is led by quarterback MF’n Flamethrower and his MF’n arm, which threw for over 5,500 yards and 51 touchdowns.
The Hood is another franchise that’s no stranger to the LomBorti Trophy, having sipped from the chalice six times. Could 109 be the seventh?
SWAT Team
Second of the two Mauler-owned teams in Pro, but first in fans’ hearts, SWAT is a 10-time LomBorti Trophy winner – even your long-absent, ink-stained correspondent remembers the early days when they were known and revered as Razorback Nation.
SWAT finished last season with a 10-and-6 record; Good enough for 3rd place, and an unfortunate first round matchup with the Asau Golden Eagles, who would best SWAT in a very close 23-27 contest on the heels of a fourth-quarter come-from-behind laser between Eagle pivot Holloway and receiver Marvin Harrison Jr. https://glb.warriorgeneral.com/game/replay.pl?game_id=44151&pbp_id=905887
First-round exit aside, SWAT remains a force to be reckoned with. Quarterback Dan Pastorini completed 298 passes for 2,967 yards while bruising power back Emmitt Smith carried the rock for 1,170 yards and 17 touchdowns.
KC Comets
Finishing at the very bottom of the standings (but topping the league in forum posts), KC will be a very interesting team to watch this upcoming season. According to team co-owner and professional agitator, PLAYMAKERS, the team will be introducing a new draft of players this season that will take the newly inaugurated Pro League by storm.
The squad will be fighting an uphill battle however, as (at time of writing), the KC squad is still showing all the chemistry of the Tom Cruise-Kelly McGillis love scene in Top Gun.
Jersey Showboats
Fourth of the RC teams to prowl the Pro League standings, the Showboats enter season 109 also boasting a storied record, having won top honours no fewer than 5 times. The hey-days of the franchise are misty however, with their most recent LomBorti Trophy dating back to Dot Bowl LXXI in a razor-close 41-39 decision.
Nevertheless, Jersey cannot be taken for granted. Quarterback Sammy Baugh passed for over 5,350 yards, and while his touchdown-to-interception ratio was reminiscent of Brett Favre’s, one must always remember the words of Canadian hockey superstar Wayne Gretzky: “You miss 100 percent of the shots you don’t take.”
Snoqualmie Wildcats
At 6-and-10, the Wildcats finished season 108 in 5th place, failing to qualify for the playoffs. Nevertheless, on the arm of quarterback Ben Hogan alone, who threw for over 4,400 yards, a team would overlook Snoqualmie at their peril. The Wildcats can boast not 1 but 2 dangerous targets, each finishing last season with over a thousand yards receiving: Scat back Justin Rose and wide receiver Darth Plagueis who finished the season with 1,297 and 1,033 receiving yards, respectively.
WAR MACHINE
War, what is it good for?
With WAR MACHINE, we encounter the first of the incoming Pro League teams to crack the Pro League from the Pro Leagues. If that sounds confusing, don’t worry – it only seems kinky the first time.
WAR MACHINE romped to a 13-and-3 record in season 108, winning the AAA title as well as the Mauler Cup tournament. Quarterback Strong Arm Witherspoon passed for over 4,500 yards and 51 touchdowns while ‘deep passing’ quarterback, ‘I’m Just Built Different’ rushed for a team-leading 916 yards, in what might be one of the more confusing GLB offenses.
Either way, Pro League champions WAR MACHINE are now entering the Pro Leagues for the first time, and pundits will be watching to see if, having won the Pro League in the past, WAR MACHINE can go on to defy all odds and win their first Pro League title.
Honolulu Hurricane Wife Carriers
Sporting what might well be the best dotball team name in dotball history, the HHWC are another franchise deserving of the title, ‘Goal Line Blitz Royalty’, having claimed no fewer than 8 LomBorti Trophies in their long and glorious history.
The green-and-green, owned by reddogrw and sponsored by Tomcic & Associates Market Research, finished season 108 in 4th place but managed to surprise pundits and bookies alike as they powered their way through two rounds to face the eventual league champions, the WAR MACHINE, in the conference final, where they lost a close contest 23-28. The second of our Pro League teams to break the glass ceiling and force their way through to the Pro League, HHWC is one to watch.
Johannesburg Jackals
Third of our triumphant Pro League teams to be promoted to the Pro League, the Jackals finished season 108 with an impressive 12-and-4 record. Defeating the High Plains Mustangs in the first round, they went on to drop a second round matchup with the eventual champs, WAR MACHINE.
Alamo City Spurs
The Spurs finished the 108th regular season with an impressive 13-and-3 record, good enough to secure 2nd seed for them. Sadly for the Spurs, they would be upset in the first round of the playoffs, falling to the Honolulu Hurricane Wife Carriers by a razor-thin margin of 33-30.
The Spurs are the fourth of our Pro League teams, arriving in the Pro League for the first time.
Miami Red Hawks
The Hawks were the team to beat in Pro last season. Compiling a 15-and-1 record in the regular season (the only team to beat them was the Athens Empire), the Hawks plowed their way through the playoffs to secure the league title. Miami will be looking to continue their winning attitude now that they’ve reached Dotlandia’s highest stage.
Tyrrhenian Sea Wasps
The Wasps are the fifth. Following a solid 10-and-6 regular season record, the Wasps defeated the London Exiles in the first round of the playoffs before falling to the Wife Carriers in an extremely close and highly entertaining second round matchup, 34-38.
Cochabamba Coyotes
The Coyotes were a force to be reckoned with last season, powering their way through to an impressive 15-and-1 record – good enough to snag top seed for Cochabamba in their Pro League conference.
Following a successful first round matchup against the Texas Tech Red Raiders, the Coyotes would go on to be defeated by the Nebraska Blackshirts in the second round by a final score of 20-21.
High Plains Mustangs
The Mustangs finished season 108 with a 10-and-6 record – good enough to secure them a 3rd-seed in the playoffs and a first round matchup with the 2nd-seed Johannesburg Jackals. The contest would be a classic, with the Jackals getting the better of the Mustangs by a mere field goal, with 25 seconds left in the game: https://glb.warriorgeneral.com/game/replay.pl?game_id=43980&pbp_id=885625
These are the games that keep us coming back!
LetMeShe/Them TD’s
I can’t read this team name without hearing Sean Connery.
The TD’s had a rough season in 108, finishing with an eventual 1-and-15 record. Whether this was by design is unknown at time of writing. The best we can say is, team owner Fred Ex is no squib, so we’ll be watching with interest for 109.
Laos Chaos
Another Pro League team powering their way through to the Pro League – we predict Laos Chaos will be a contender following their impressive 13-and-3 performance last season, good enough to win the top seed in their conference.
Co-owned by market research conglomerate Tomcic & Associates, the Chaos crushed all opposition en route to a decisive 32-21 victory over the Nebraska Blackshirts in the AAA final.
As they explode into Goal Line Blitz’s top tier, watch the Chaos unfold.
London Exiles
The sharp-dressed Exiles battled their way through the Pro League to an 8-and-8 record in season 108. They fell to the Tyrrhenian Sea Wasps in the first round, but this looks like a solidly-built team, and one to watch in the coming seasons.
Midnight Marauders
At 12-and-4, the Marauders finished with a regular season record good enough to land them atop their conference. The team would go on to beat the Adriatic Sea Wasps and the OHIO HOOLIGANS in the first two rounds of the playoffs, before dropping a close contest to the Miami Red Hawks in the league championship, 28-31.
Look for the Marauders to avenge their oh-so-close finish, now that they’ve made it the GLB’s biggest stage.
Nebraska Blackshirts
The Blackshirts finished their regular season with an “okay” 11-and-5 record – good enough to land them in 3rd seed. But as your correspondent has come to learn, a husker4life team doesn’t come to life until the playoffs.
Following their “so-so” regular season, the Blackshirts kicked it up a notch in the playoffs to win their first two rounds against the Philadelphia Jawns and Cochabamba Coyotes. They’d eventually fall to the Laos Chaos in the league championship, but this team has proven (across multiple leagues) that you can never count them out.
Athens Empire
Headed by olive-oil emprasario and shipping magnate Kenshinzen, the Sea Wasp network’s tendrils reach into multiple teams, and across all GLB leagues. Many a dot’s career has been made by the favorable nod, or conversely, dashed against the rocks of a Tyrrhenian lee shore, all according to the whims of ‘the system’.
That being said, the proof is in the pooding. Can a structurally solid, well-oiled and well-managed organization outperform the good X’s and O’s of good game planning? Or can an independent program still hope to compete against the networks and ‘old boys clubs’ of the dotball milieu?
Find out in 109!
Post-script – please remember to renew your subscription to The Capital Times – our editors gotta eat!
Volume 2, Issue 2
Explanatory Note – The following analysis has been compiled by the Society for the Advancement of Dotball Research (SADR), and is based on the most rigorous and painstaking statistical research yet conducted in Dotlandia. As such, we are confident in its authenticity and veracity. As always, however, caution should be exercised while drawing conclusions and, certainly, under no circumstances will SADR be liable for any dumb bets you place, based on our findings.
Sadermetrics Released
Thank you for purchasing your copy of The Capital Times – boasting the sharpest-dressed reporters in all fake media.
The Society for the Advancement of Dotball Research (SADR) released their pre-season metrics earlier this week, and dots across the land were eager to parse their findings, in advance of the inaugural season in the post-Champion League format. The Capital Times is a fan of Pwned’s early pre-season prognostications, and will therefore follow Pwned’s lead in order of reporting. Without further adieu, we begin our analysis…
Orlando Prime Timers
The Prime Timers may still be drunk after celebrating their second consecutive championship in Dot Bowl CVIII. But they’ll have to put the coffee on and shake off the cobwebs if they want to keep the streak alive in 109, as the new format promises an exciting and unpredictable competitive landscape.
Fortunately for Orlando, they have perhaps the most famous play-caller in all of GLB lore coordinating their games in RyanCane26. Widely respected for his prowess as a game-planner, RC will have several superstars at his disposal, not least of which is quarterback Jaylen Leslie, who threw for 6,238 yards and 50 touchdowns last season, completing over 70 percent of all pass attempts. Complementing Leslie’s aerial attack will be all-star power back, Bo Jackson, who rushed for just shy of 1,000 yards last season, busting 119 tackles and knocking out 214 teeth along the way.
Orlando is determined to keep the streak alive, but will have a target on their backs as the new season begins. It’s hard to win. Harder to repeat. To three-peat… is divine.
Cherokee Nation
Cherokee Nation entered Dot Bowl CVIII as something of a dark horse, having finished their regular season as the 4th-seed underdog with a rather uninspiring 6-10 regular season record. (Fans of our beloved Capital Ravens will note, our hometown favorites finished season 108 with an equivalent record and yet failed to qualify for the post-season.) But Cherokee proved the old adage: Make it to the post-season dance and anything is possible. They surprised the conference leading Florida Frenzy in the first round, before romping their way through the rest of the conference to contend in Dot Bowl CVIII. Alas for the Nation, the clock struck midnight on their dream run as the Prime Timers bested them in the big game.
But the future of this team is intriguing. Quarterback Jim Plunkett threw for almost 3,000 yards last season and the Nation boasted not one, but two running backs who carried the rock for over a thousand yards each – Power back Larry Czonka and his kid brother, Earl Campball, who rushed for 1,471 and 1,055 yards, respectively. Meanwhile, on defense, cornerback Hanford Dixon lead the league with an impressive 13 interceptions.
Will season 109 be their season to dethrone the reigning champs? If season 108 is anything to go by, you can’t count the Nation out.
Asau Golden Eagles
The second of RC’s Pro League teams, Asau is no stranger to post season glory, having sipped the sweet champagne of victory no fewer than 6 times, the most recent being a thrilling come-from-behind victory over the Brothers in Arms in Dot Bowl CVI following a highlight reel pass from Teddy Holloway to Ollie Lofton with under two minutes to play: https://glb.warriorgeneral.com/game/replay.pl?game_id=34533&pbp_id=920841 .
The Eagles finished season 108 in the 2nd seed of their conference with an impressive 11-and-5 record, and showed every sign of carrying their momentum into the Dot Bowl before dropping the conference final to the surprising 6-and-10 upstarts, Cherokee Nation. Will the sting of defeat sharpen the Eagles’ focus? History suggests yes. But the squad may be suffering from the divided attentions of their mastermind coordinator RyanCanes, who will be managing no fewer than 4 Pro League squads next season. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JlmucnEgKfI
Tempe Venom
A non-network team, Tempe finished last regular season atop their conference with (what your faithful correspondent is quickly coming to realize was not a terribly remarkable) 11-and-5 record. Seems parity was a real thing in the last season of the Champion League! The Venom defeated the Jersey Showboats in the opening round before falling to the eventual champs in the Conference Final by a score of 16-31.
The Venom is an interesting squad, largely inflicting their damage through a precision aerial attack led by the prolific (if not so creatively named) pivot, ‘QB - 1’, who passed for 5,200 yards and 37 touchdowns. Can a pass-happy offense lead Tempe to the promised land in 109?
Florida Frenzy
Third of the Pro League teams with RyanCane’s hand on the tiller, the Frenzy is another storied franchise with its fingerprints all over the LomBorti Trophy, having won the championship 6 times. Season 108 was not one of them, however. The Frenzy finished their regular season atop their conference but were shocked by a first-round upset at the hands of Cherokee Nation.
Upset aside, Florida commands respect. Pivot Ken Anderson completed 460 passes for over 5,300 yards and 43 touchdowns while power back Marcus Allen lowered the shoulder and romped his way to another thousand-yards-rushing season (his 6th consecutive). Don’t count Florida out.
C-Town MF’n Hood
The influencers behind Goal Line Blitz’s most popular line of underwear, the C-Town MF’n Hood is a ‘punch-in-the-mouth’ squad that finished last season with a winning 10-and-6 record. They fell to the eventual champs Orlando Prime Timers in the first round, but the affair was a tight one, with Orlando needing a 5th-frame to finally seal the deal.
The Hood’s attack is led by quarterback MF’n Flamethrower and his MF’n arm, which threw for over 5,500 yards and 51 touchdowns.
The Hood is another franchise that’s no stranger to the LomBorti Trophy, having sipped from the chalice six times. Could 109 be the seventh?
SWAT Team
Second of the two Mauler-owned teams in Pro, but first in fans’ hearts, SWAT is a 10-time LomBorti Trophy winner – even your long-absent, ink-stained correspondent remembers the early days when they were known and revered as Razorback Nation.
SWAT finished last season with a 10-and-6 record; Good enough for 3rd place, and an unfortunate first round matchup with the Asau Golden Eagles, who would best SWAT in a very close 23-27 contest on the heels of a fourth-quarter come-from-behind laser between Eagle pivot Holloway and receiver Marvin Harrison Jr. https://glb.warriorgeneral.com/game/replay.pl?game_id=44151&pbp_id=905887
First-round exit aside, SWAT remains a force to be reckoned with. Quarterback Dan Pastorini completed 298 passes for 2,967 yards while bruising power back Emmitt Smith carried the rock for 1,170 yards and 17 touchdowns.
KC Comets
Finishing at the very bottom of the standings (but topping the league in forum posts), KC will be a very interesting team to watch this upcoming season. According to team co-owner and professional agitator, PLAYMAKERS, the team will be introducing a new draft of players this season that will take the newly inaugurated Pro League by storm.
The squad will be fighting an uphill battle however, as (at time of writing), the KC squad is still showing all the chemistry of the Tom Cruise-Kelly McGillis love scene in Top Gun.
Jersey Showboats
Fourth of the RC teams to prowl the Pro League standings, the Showboats enter season 109 also boasting a storied record, having won top honours no fewer than 5 times. The hey-days of the franchise are misty however, with their most recent LomBorti Trophy dating back to Dot Bowl LXXI in a razor-close 41-39 decision.
Nevertheless, Jersey cannot be taken for granted. Quarterback Sammy Baugh passed for over 5,350 yards, and while his touchdown-to-interception ratio was reminiscent of Brett Favre’s, one must always remember the words of Canadian hockey superstar Wayne Gretzky: “You miss 100 percent of the shots you don’t take.”
Snoqualmie Wildcats
At 6-and-10, the Wildcats finished season 108 in 5th place, failing to qualify for the playoffs. Nevertheless, on the arm of quarterback Ben Hogan alone, who threw for over 4,400 yards, a team would overlook Snoqualmie at their peril. The Wildcats can boast not 1 but 2 dangerous targets, each finishing last season with over a thousand yards receiving: Scat back Justin Rose and wide receiver Darth Plagueis who finished the season with 1,297 and 1,033 receiving yards, respectively.
WAR MACHINE
War, what is it good for?
With WAR MACHINE, we encounter the first of the incoming Pro League teams to crack the Pro League from the Pro Leagues. If that sounds confusing, don’t worry – it only seems kinky the first time.
WAR MACHINE romped to a 13-and-3 record in season 108, winning the AAA title as well as the Mauler Cup tournament. Quarterback Strong Arm Witherspoon passed for over 4,500 yards and 51 touchdowns while ‘deep passing’ quarterback, ‘I’m Just Built Different’ rushed for a team-leading 916 yards, in what might be one of the more confusing GLB offenses.
Either way, Pro League champions WAR MACHINE are now entering the Pro Leagues for the first time, and pundits will be watching to see if, having won the Pro League in the past, WAR MACHINE can go on to defy all odds and win their first Pro League title.
Honolulu Hurricane Wife Carriers
Sporting what might well be the best dotball team name in dotball history, the HHWC are another franchise deserving of the title, ‘Goal Line Blitz Royalty’, having claimed no fewer than 8 LomBorti Trophies in their long and glorious history.
The green-and-green, owned by reddogrw and sponsored by Tomcic & Associates Market Research, finished season 108 in 4th place but managed to surprise pundits and bookies alike as they powered their way through two rounds to face the eventual league champions, the WAR MACHINE, in the conference final, where they lost a close contest 23-28. The second of our Pro League teams to break the glass ceiling and force their way through to the Pro League, HHWC is one to watch.
Johannesburg Jackals
Third of our triumphant Pro League teams to be promoted to the Pro League, the Jackals finished season 108 with an impressive 12-and-4 record. Defeating the High Plains Mustangs in the first round, they went on to drop a second round matchup with the eventual champs, WAR MACHINE.
Alamo City Spurs
The Spurs finished the 108th regular season with an impressive 13-and-3 record, good enough to secure 2nd seed for them. Sadly for the Spurs, they would be upset in the first round of the playoffs, falling to the Honolulu Hurricane Wife Carriers by a razor-thin margin of 33-30.
The Spurs are the fourth of our Pro League teams, arriving in the Pro League for the first time.
Miami Red Hawks
The Hawks were the team to beat in Pro last season. Compiling a 15-and-1 record in the regular season (the only team to beat them was the Athens Empire), the Hawks plowed their way through the playoffs to secure the league title. Miami will be looking to continue their winning attitude now that they’ve reached Dotlandia’s highest stage.
Tyrrhenian Sea Wasps
The Wasps are the fifth. Following a solid 10-and-6 regular season record, the Wasps defeated the London Exiles in the first round of the playoffs before falling to the Wife Carriers in an extremely close and highly entertaining second round matchup, 34-38.
Cochabamba Coyotes
The Coyotes were a force to be reckoned with last season, powering their way through to an impressive 15-and-1 record – good enough to snag top seed for Cochabamba in their Pro League conference.
Following a successful first round matchup against the Texas Tech Red Raiders, the Coyotes would go on to be defeated by the Nebraska Blackshirts in the second round by a final score of 20-21.
High Plains Mustangs
The Mustangs finished season 108 with a 10-and-6 record – good enough to secure them a 3rd-seed in the playoffs and a first round matchup with the 2nd-seed Johannesburg Jackals. The contest would be a classic, with the Jackals getting the better of the Mustangs by a mere field goal, with 25 seconds left in the game: https://glb.warriorgeneral.com/game/replay.pl?game_id=43980&pbp_id=885625
These are the games that keep us coming back!
LetMeShe/Them TD’s
I can’t read this team name without hearing Sean Connery.
The TD’s had a rough season in 108, finishing with an eventual 1-and-15 record. Whether this was by design is unknown at time of writing. The best we can say is, team owner Fred Ex is no squib, so we’ll be watching with interest for 109.
Laos Chaos
Another Pro League team powering their way through to the Pro League – we predict Laos Chaos will be a contender following their impressive 13-and-3 performance last season, good enough to win the top seed in their conference.
Co-owned by market research conglomerate Tomcic & Associates, the Chaos crushed all opposition en route to a decisive 32-21 victory over the Nebraska Blackshirts in the AAA final.
As they explode into Goal Line Blitz’s top tier, watch the Chaos unfold.
London Exiles
The sharp-dressed Exiles battled their way through the Pro League to an 8-and-8 record in season 108. They fell to the Tyrrhenian Sea Wasps in the first round, but this looks like a solidly-built team, and one to watch in the coming seasons.
Midnight Marauders
At 12-and-4, the Marauders finished with a regular season record good enough to land them atop their conference. The team would go on to beat the Adriatic Sea Wasps and the OHIO HOOLIGANS in the first two rounds of the playoffs, before dropping a close contest to the Miami Red Hawks in the league championship, 28-31.
Look for the Marauders to avenge their oh-so-close finish, now that they’ve made it the GLB’s biggest stage.
Nebraska Blackshirts
The Blackshirts finished their regular season with an “okay” 11-and-5 record – good enough to land them in 3rd seed. But as your correspondent has come to learn, a husker4life team doesn’t come to life until the playoffs.
Following their “so-so” regular season, the Blackshirts kicked it up a notch in the playoffs to win their first two rounds against the Philadelphia Jawns and Cochabamba Coyotes. They’d eventually fall to the Laos Chaos in the league championship, but this team has proven (across multiple leagues) that you can never count them out.
Athens Empire
Headed by olive-oil emprasario and shipping magnate Kenshinzen, the Sea Wasp network’s tendrils reach into multiple teams, and across all GLB leagues. Many a dot’s career has been made by the favorable nod, or conversely, dashed against the rocks of a Tyrrhenian lee shore, all according to the whims of ‘the system’.
That being said, the proof is in the pooding. Can a structurally solid, well-oiled and well-managed organization outperform the good X’s and O’s of good game planning? Or can an independent program still hope to compete against the networks and ‘old boys clubs’ of the dotball milieu?
Find out in 109!
Post-script – please remember to renew your subscription to The Capital Times – our editors gotta eat!
Edited by Ravenwood on Sep 14, 2024 02:27:23
Edited by Ravenwood on Sep 14, 2024 01:56:20
