Texan’s Week 5 Picks
Usual disclaimer: this is my opinion only. If you don’t like it, I still love you.
In honor of the retirement of Mirko Cro Cop, welcome to Duran Duran week.
Picks record this season: 58-6
Naga
Game of the Week
Victoria Teabaggers (4-0) v Woody Island Wolverines (3-1)
WIW is trying to avenge last season’s losses as VT eeked out a 24-17 victory in the regular season and then followed that up with a 48-13 drubbing in the playoffs. It seems WIW has recently Come Undone http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ICnlyNUt_0o when facing the Teabaggers, but trends were made to be broken. Is this the time? VT 30, WIW 21
Other Games
Palembang Drunken Monks (4-0) v Semarang Red Bulls (0-4)
It seems that everyone is out on a Semarang revenge tour this season, but the Monks actually beat them last season as well. Besides, the Monks are more Hungry Like the Wolf http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oOg5VxrRTi0 for a title rather than regular season wins at this point. Monks 255, Semarang 0
Portland Dirty Penguins (4-0) v Tibetan Drunk Monks (3-1)
TDM has looked much better than anticipated this season, so it’s time I gave them some props. The question now is can they slow the PDP roll? Between Dark Passenger and Rabbit Ears, there are some Wild Boys http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M43wsiNBwmo to try and contain over there. PDP 42, TDM 21
Royal Blue Drunken Smurfs of Funkalicious Labatt (3-1) v Singapore Slingers (0-4)
The Smurfs were brought back to Earth a bit last time in their WIW loss, but now it’s back to work. The way SS has played thus far, the Smurfs should have a View to a Kill http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fp4CR2HcHLQ in this one, but not over look anyone. Smurfs 127, SS 3
Sainte Foy Cyclones (3-1) v Benton Harbor Havoc (1-3)
Normally by this time a mirror image record matchup is a bad thing but this game is different. I don’t think a whole lot separates these two teams and it should be pretty competitive. Last season SFC won 27-17, but don’t let any Careless Memories http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W1N19zOBKCE make you, um, careless and stuff. SFC 27, BHH 17
The Cult of Personalities (3-1) v Hong Kong Hustlers (0-4)
CoP is the next to say farewell to the ‘ol Huslters. Tbh, I’d rather watch Girls on Film http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gudEttJlw3s than this game. CoP 255, HKH 0
Bandar Lampung Pigskin Pirates (2-2) v Las Vegas Dirty Hookers (1-3)
LVDH has had a rough intro to Naga this season and now they face fellow (kinda) newcomer BLPP, but having been here before BLPP seems better prepared for the step up in competition. Maybe LVDH should take a team retreat to Rio http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e3W6yf6c-FA to regroup. BLPP 45, LVDH 13
Golden Hill Bones (2-2) v Wichita Black Magic (1-3)
As good as the first two games were for GHB, that’s how bad the last two have been. Time to regroup. WBM has pretty much struggled throughout but they’ll have other winning opportunities this season. Will GHB get The Reflex http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDnNF5cHCdo for winning back? GHB 38, WBM 6
__________________________________________________
lolgaruda
Game of the Week
Buffalo Rampage (2-2) v Krakow Kryptonite (2-2)
Two teams that are sure to make the playoffs collide in a game that will send one of them under .500 almost ⅓ of the way through the season. Last season Buffalo won 32-3, but will that be the Ordinary World http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dDLiVwpv89s or does it change this time out? Buffalo 30, Krakow 20
Other Games
SDSU Aztecs (4-0) v Halifax Harpoons (1-3)
SDSU has looked great so far this season but has managed to avoid all of the elite lolgaruda teams thus far. No offense to HH, but that trend continues this time out. Things have gone so well that there could be some partying but avoid those White Lines http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zsdnfWcapUc as it will lead to your downfall. Just ask LT. SDSU 49, HH 14
Three Kingdom Warriors (4-0) v Shanghai Tigers (1-3)
TKW’s chemistry has had them living on the edge the past couple of weeks but they still roll into Shanghai undefeated. The Tigers meanwhile have scored a respectable amount of points but haven’t really stopped anyone yet. I would tell them to call 911 when playing TKW, but 911 is a Joke http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_k_BgzSDQNk in SEA. TKW 52, Shanghai 17
Wu Dang Kung Fu Academy (3-1) v Destin Leviathans (2-2)
I’m starting to get a read on Destin for the season now that I’ve seen them against a few different levels of teams and they are looking like a lower tier playoff team. Unfortunately for them, the Notorious http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HGDmBLAPikU KFA crew is a home playoff kinda team. Wu 45, Destin 17
Phu Khao Bow Chicka Brown Cows (3-1) v Tanzania Lumberjacks (2-2)
TL got off to a nice start this season but the last couple of games have been rough. It gets even rougher now that they face the Cows. It seems more like they’re playing the Union of the Snake http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n6p5Q6_JBes instead of a group of bovines. Cows 38, TL 13
NBA Jam Extreme (2-2) v Boston Bears (2-2)
Another fun matchup of 2-2 teams, both of which will probably make the playoffs, but one of which will be under .500 after this. Did Boston Save A Prayer http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BHAVsWksQLA for this game or will they give up a big chunk of points like they did in their two losses? NBA 42, Boston 20
Atlantic Great Whites (2-2) v Mandalay King Cobras (1-3)
Much like TL, AGW started strong then wilted horribly the last two games. MKC has competed hard against some very good teams in a brutal opening schedule. Now they should start picking up some wins, or Is There Something I Should Know http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3M0hogZyRyU MKC 45, AGW 16
Bourbontown BlueCats (0-4) v Island of Misfit Toys (0-4)
Last season IMT defied the odds and stayed aboard in SEA and this season they’ve been competing well, but just coming up short. BBC has not been very close thus far, but this is certainly their best chance yet at a win. Which team starts taking off and which stays down on Planet Earth http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8NF6Qa84mno IMT 23, BBC 20
Usual disclaimer: this is my opinion only. If you don’t like it, I still love you.
In honor of the retirement of Mirko Cro Cop, welcome to Duran Duran week.
Picks record this season: 58-6
Naga
Game of the Week
Victoria Teabaggers (4-0) v Woody Island Wolverines (3-1)
WIW is trying to avenge last season’s losses as VT eeked out a 24-17 victory in the regular season and then followed that up with a 48-13 drubbing in the playoffs. It seems WIW has recently Come Undone http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ICnlyNUt_0o when facing the Teabaggers, but trends were made to be broken. Is this the time? VT 30, WIW 21
Other Games
Palembang Drunken Monks (4-0) v Semarang Red Bulls (0-4)
It seems that everyone is out on a Semarang revenge tour this season, but the Monks actually beat them last season as well. Besides, the Monks are more Hungry Like the Wolf http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oOg5VxrRTi0 for a title rather than regular season wins at this point. Monks 255, Semarang 0
Portland Dirty Penguins (4-0) v Tibetan Drunk Monks (3-1)
TDM has looked much better than anticipated this season, so it’s time I gave them some props. The question now is can they slow the PDP roll? Between Dark Passenger and Rabbit Ears, there are some Wild Boys http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M43wsiNBwmo to try and contain over there. PDP 42, TDM 21
Royal Blue Drunken Smurfs of Funkalicious Labatt (3-1) v Singapore Slingers (0-4)
The Smurfs were brought back to Earth a bit last time in their WIW loss, but now it’s back to work. The way SS has played thus far, the Smurfs should have a View to a Kill http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fp4CR2HcHLQ in this one, but not over look anyone. Smurfs 127, SS 3
Sainte Foy Cyclones (3-1) v Benton Harbor Havoc (1-3)
Normally by this time a mirror image record matchup is a bad thing but this game is different. I don’t think a whole lot separates these two teams and it should be pretty competitive. Last season SFC won 27-17, but don’t let any Careless Memories http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W1N19zOBKCE make you, um, careless and stuff. SFC 27, BHH 17
The Cult of Personalities (3-1) v Hong Kong Hustlers (0-4)
CoP is the next to say farewell to the ‘ol Huslters. Tbh, I’d rather watch Girls on Film http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gudEttJlw3s than this game. CoP 255, HKH 0
Bandar Lampung Pigskin Pirates (2-2) v Las Vegas Dirty Hookers (1-3)
LVDH has had a rough intro to Naga this season and now they face fellow (kinda) newcomer BLPP, but having been here before BLPP seems better prepared for the step up in competition. Maybe LVDH should take a team retreat to Rio http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e3W6yf6c-FA to regroup. BLPP 45, LVDH 13
Golden Hill Bones (2-2) v Wichita Black Magic (1-3)
As good as the first two games were for GHB, that’s how bad the last two have been. Time to regroup. WBM has pretty much struggled throughout but they’ll have other winning opportunities this season. Will GHB get The Reflex http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDnNF5cHCdo for winning back? GHB 38, WBM 6
__________________________________________________
lolgaruda
Game of the Week
Buffalo Rampage (2-2) v Krakow Kryptonite (2-2)
Two teams that are sure to make the playoffs collide in a game that will send one of them under .500 almost ⅓ of the way through the season. Last season Buffalo won 32-3, but will that be the Ordinary World http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dDLiVwpv89s or does it change this time out? Buffalo 30, Krakow 20
Other Games
SDSU Aztecs (4-0) v Halifax Harpoons (1-3)
SDSU has looked great so far this season but has managed to avoid all of the elite lolgaruda teams thus far. No offense to HH, but that trend continues this time out. Things have gone so well that there could be some partying but avoid those White Lines http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zsdnfWcapUc as it will lead to your downfall. Just ask LT. SDSU 49, HH 14
Three Kingdom Warriors (4-0) v Shanghai Tigers (1-3)
TKW’s chemistry has had them living on the edge the past couple of weeks but they still roll into Shanghai undefeated. The Tigers meanwhile have scored a respectable amount of points but haven’t really stopped anyone yet. I would tell them to call 911 when playing TKW, but 911 is a Joke http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_k_BgzSDQNk in SEA. TKW 52, Shanghai 17
Wu Dang Kung Fu Academy (3-1) v Destin Leviathans (2-2)
I’m starting to get a read on Destin for the season now that I’ve seen them against a few different levels of teams and they are looking like a lower tier playoff team. Unfortunately for them, the Notorious http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HGDmBLAPikU KFA crew is a home playoff kinda team. Wu 45, Destin 17
Phu Khao Bow Chicka Brown Cows (3-1) v Tanzania Lumberjacks (2-2)
TL got off to a nice start this season but the last couple of games have been rough. It gets even rougher now that they face the Cows. It seems more like they’re playing the Union of the Snake http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n6p5Q6_JBes instead of a group of bovines. Cows 38, TL 13
NBA Jam Extreme (2-2) v Boston Bears (2-2)
Another fun matchup of 2-2 teams, both of which will probably make the playoffs, but one of which will be under .500 after this. Did Boston Save A Prayer http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BHAVsWksQLA for this game or will they give up a big chunk of points like they did in their two losses? NBA 42, Boston 20
Atlantic Great Whites (2-2) v Mandalay King Cobras (1-3)
Much like TL, AGW started strong then wilted horribly the last two games. MKC has competed hard against some very good teams in a brutal opening schedule. Now they should start picking up some wins, or Is There Something I Should Know http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3M0hogZyRyU MKC 45, AGW 16
Bourbontown BlueCats (0-4) v Island of Misfit Toys (0-4)
Last season IMT defied the odds and stayed aboard in SEA and this season they’ve been competing well, but just coming up short. BBC has not been very close thus far, but this is certainly their best chance yet at a win. Which team starts taking off and which stays down on Planet Earth http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8NF6Qa84mno IMT 23, BBC 20
