Fuck sympathy! I don't need your fuckin' sympathy, man, I need my fucking johnson!
I don’t even remember what my mark is now, but I'm sure we can all agree it's p fuggin good, maybe even great... at worst, it's better than yours, and that’s all that matters, amirite?
It’s nitty-MF-gritty time in WELP so let’s quit fuckin around and get right to it k?
ALPHA
Speyside Whiskies (14-3, #4) @ Parma Panthers (16-1, #1): Those pesky Whiskers used a smothering defense and an efficient, methodical offense to just totally dominate E-City, whereas one might argue Parma wasn’t too sharp against München and probably got by on levels alone. (14/43 passing?!? Egad man!) Regardless, them Nurple boys witnessed first hand what kind of team the Panthers can be when they put their mind to it and I reckon they’ve got their GP goggles on atm. That Whiskies team should be a preseason WEPL favorite in S16 but I just don’t think they’ve got the ponies to run w/ Parm. Parma by 10.
Speyside 33-20
LUX Borg (15-2, #3) @ Naples Purple Nurples (16-1, #2): The team I’m told I hate rides into Nurpleville fresh off a rd. 1 nailbiter. Meanwhile the Nurps bounced back nicely in rd. 1 after a 4th quarter meltdown in what was truly an epic W16 game against Parm. Were you just to look at the final score of that first round tilt you might wonder where that D went that’d been rock solid all season, but upon closer inspection you’d see that all of the Doom’s points came because Jed’s K/PR is full of fail. xoxo Jed. Anywho when these two teams met up back in W7, both pass games were atrocious and were it not for a failed 4th down attempt from the Nurples 44 y/l, that one could’ve gone the other way. Point being, that game was way closer than the 10 point spread at the end. Imma take Naples, since that’s what everybody expects me to do (plus I hate the Borg, ldo), but I won’t be surprised if the Borg wins this one. Naples by 3
Naples 34-20
ZETA
Warsaw Wolves (13-4, #4) @ The Evil Empire (17-0): Sure I’m biased, but just on scores alone nobody looked better in rd. 1 than us. And anytime you force somebody into negative totals rushing the football you feel p good, I won’t lie. But we’ve got to be more efficient passing going forward, that’s for damn sure. Hopefully we get it figured out quickly, because not a lot of teams shut the run down like Warsaw does. Matter of fact, they held us to our lowest YPC all season when we met back in W6. I don’t have to look any further than their rd. 1 win against BKB to know this will be a battle. That Bees ground game had really been rolling and they blew that up - 2.3 YPC on 38 attempts is fuggin impressive. This one will ultimately come down to who’s schemes better, plain and simple. Best of luck to william and the Wolves, but I hope it’s us.
Evil 38-10
The Legion (12-5, #6) @ Alpine (16-1, #2): Props to the Legion for grinding out the only ‘upset’ in rd. 1 despite being outgained and at times looking woeful running the football. Opportunistic win, to say the least; but hey, that’s what the good teams do - they turn TOs into points. Business as usual in rd. 1 for Alpine, looking very crisp on both sides of the ball. I’ll be honest, I really enjoy watching that offense, so long as it’s not against my team. And you guys just shut down everything they tried to do with the ball. Very, very solid. Giving up 6 sacks and 3 fumbles (none lost) probably worries cav, but an owner’s not a good owner if they don’t find something to worry about, eh? The Legion’s run ends here and now the guessing begins concerning on which WEPL team we’ll see that group next season. Alpine by 13.
Alpine 56-31
xoxoxo
I don’t even remember what my mark is now, but I'm sure we can all agree it's p fuggin good, maybe even great... at worst, it's better than yours, and that’s all that matters, amirite?
It’s nitty-MF-gritty time in WELP so let’s quit fuckin around and get right to it k?
ALPHA
Speyside Whiskies (14-3, #4) @ Parma Panthers (16-1, #1): Those pesky Whiskers used a smothering defense and an efficient, methodical offense to just totally dominate E-City, whereas one might argue Parma wasn’t too sharp against München and probably got by on levels alone. (14/43 passing?!? Egad man!) Regardless, them Nurple boys witnessed first hand what kind of team the Panthers can be when they put their mind to it and I reckon they’ve got their GP goggles on atm. That Whiskies team should be a preseason WEPL favorite in S16 but I just don’t think they’ve got the ponies to run w/ Parm. Parma by 10.
Speyside 33-20
LUX Borg (15-2, #3) @ Naples Purple Nurples (16-1, #2): The team I’m told I hate rides into Nurpleville fresh off a rd. 1 nailbiter. Meanwhile the Nurps bounced back nicely in rd. 1 after a 4th quarter meltdown in what was truly an epic W16 game against Parm. Were you just to look at the final score of that first round tilt you might wonder where that D went that’d been rock solid all season, but upon closer inspection you’d see that all of the Doom’s points came because Jed’s K/PR is full of fail. xoxo Jed. Anywho when these two teams met up back in W7, both pass games were atrocious and were it not for a failed 4th down attempt from the Nurples 44 y/l, that one could’ve gone the other way. Point being, that game was way closer than the 10 point spread at the end. Imma take Naples, since that’s what everybody expects me to do (plus I hate the Borg, ldo), but I won’t be surprised if the Borg wins this one. Naples by 3
Naples 34-20
ZETA
Warsaw Wolves (13-4, #4) @ The Evil Empire (17-0): Sure I’m biased, but just on scores alone nobody looked better in rd. 1 than us. And anytime you force somebody into negative totals rushing the football you feel p good, I won’t lie. But we’ve got to be more efficient passing going forward, that’s for damn sure. Hopefully we get it figured out quickly, because not a lot of teams shut the run down like Warsaw does. Matter of fact, they held us to our lowest YPC all season when we met back in W6. I don’t have to look any further than their rd. 1 win against BKB to know this will be a battle. That Bees ground game had really been rolling and they blew that up - 2.3 YPC on 38 attempts is fuggin impressive. This one will ultimately come down to who’s schemes better, plain and simple. Best of luck to william and the Wolves, but I hope it’s us.
Evil 38-10
The Legion (12-5, #6) @ Alpine (16-1, #2): Props to the Legion for grinding out the only ‘upset’ in rd. 1 despite being outgained and at times looking woeful running the football. Opportunistic win, to say the least; but hey, that’s what the good teams do - they turn TOs into points. Business as usual in rd. 1 for Alpine, looking very crisp on both sides of the ball. I’ll be honest, I really enjoy watching that offense, so long as it’s not against my team. And you guys just shut down everything they tried to do with the ball. Very, very solid. Giving up 6 sacks and 3 fumbles (none lost) probably worries cav, but an owner’s not a good owner if they don’t find something to worry about, eh? The Legion’s run ends here and now the guessing begins concerning on which WEPL team we’ll see that group next season. Alpine by 13.
Alpine 56-31
xoxoxo
Edited by lardaddy on May 12, 2010 09:55:51
Thanks for doing these! Hope to see one with Borg v. Evil Empire. Hater.
