Warrior General Games

So this is it.
This is what it all comes down too.
32 teams started off the season and we’ve fought and scraped our way down through 19 games to finally reach the final game of the season, the game to decide the season 14 EE Pro Champions and the winner of the season 14 Pimp Cup.
The Sofia Spiders and the C-Town Hoodlums are the last two surviving teams of the season, it’s just the two of them…………………
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yi4JxUSRSRY

So the Spiders pull of the upset over Short Bus to move on to the finals against the C-Town Hoodlums.
We here at the Sport’s Page would like to say to all the other 30 teams in EE Pro, thanks for playing.
And congrats and good luck to the Sofia Spiders and the C-Town Hoodlums!


Season 14 EE Pro Championship Preview
Some said we wouldn’t play this game.
Some said we shouldn’t play this game.
Some said we couldn’t play this game.
I say we let these two bad ass mofo’s fight it out in a gala event in a venue fit for kings the way Mother Nature intended!
Ah yes, Mother Nature, she's one nutty bitch.

This game will crown the new Pimp Cup champion…………..
http://i378.photobucket.com/albums/oo227/jason41470/pc3.jpg (yes, it’s the coveted Pimp Cup!)
……………AND the official EE Pro Champion for season 14!

Their team name will be inscribed in the history books and join these teams as the winners of the most prized trophy ever to be cranked out of a gum ball machine!

Pimp Cup Champions!
Season 5 – Banghazi Barbary Lions
Season 6 – Pretoria Pigs
Season 7 – Czech Yourself
Season 8 – Paris Smexies
Season 9 – Wildflecken Wolverines
Season 10 – Banja Luka Funky Bunch
Season 11 – Pirgos Warlords
Season 12 – Warsaw Gods of War
Season 13 – Jefferson City Bucks
Season 14: ?????????????

The winner will get a little of this…………………
http://i378.photobucket.com/albums/oo227/jason41470/beer-styles1.jpg
……a lot of that…..
http://i378.photobucket.com/albums/oo227/jason41470/johigyyig.jpg
…….and a shit load of the other……..
http://i378.photobucket.com/albums/oo227/jason41470/phppYWpCgAM.jpg

The loser will get………………
http://i378.photobucket.com/albums/oo227/jason41470/sugar-pwned.jpg
……they will also receive this………….
http://i378.photobucket.com/albums/oo227/jason41470/thSexySheep.gif
...and a ride home in the……………..
http://i378.photobucket.com/albums/oo227/jason41470/wahmbulance.jpg

It’s as simple as that, chuckleheads.

This is the game that separates the men from the boys!
This is the game that separates the boys from their momma’s teets!
This is the game that people will write dirty limericks about on the walls of bathroom stalls!
This is the game that people will create videos about to post on Youtube or Break.com!
This is the game that with 10 seconds of simming can turn one team into a hero and the other into a zero!
This is THE EE PRO LEAGUE CHAMPIONSHIP!!!! (hope you brought a change of undies for this one)
YAY!!

So buy your tickets, get your parking stub validated, buy your popcorn, chocolate malts, and meats on a stick and settle into your seat, because the Season 14 EE Pro Championship is about to begin!!!!


Ladies and gentlemen!
Boys and girls of all ages!
Mr. and Mrs. America, all the ships at sea and to our troops across the globe!
Welcome to the greatest show on Earth!!
We are here, LIVE, at the only place big enough, tough enough and strong enough that the can house the GLBowl and the Pimp Cup at the same time!!
That’s right, we are at THUNDER DOME!!!

And welcome to Thunder Dome, tonight we have the fight of the century about to happen in our own cozy little cornewr of the GLB universe.
It’s the GLBowl and the Pimp Cup all wrapped up into one huge fucking game!
The Sofia Spiders and the C-Town Hoodlums will go at it tonight to see which team shall reign supreme!
The EE Pro Champion will be crowned tonight and all kinds of shit will break loose tonight!!

…………..wait, I think I hear the music starting up for the Alpha Champions, the Sofia Spiders!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PuYN3NmfIjA
Coming down the aisle, wearing the blue and black trunks, measured at 6’ 11” and weighing in at 7672.89 lbs, coming into this bout with a 17-2 record, 11 of those wins by way of blow out, being led to the ring by their good friend Wilbur the pig, they are the warlords of webs, the lords of the dance, they are two time Gold Trophy winners and they are the newly proclaimed season 14 Alpha Champions, the Sofia Spiders!!!
The Spiders are coming off a huge upset win over the Short Bus Allstars in the Alpha title fight. They just had a nice dinner at Red Robin’s gourmet burgers (actually they were in the dumpster catching flies) and they are ready to got to war!

Alpha Champions: Sofia Spiders
Hometown: Sofia, Bulgaria
Record: 17-2
Height: 6’ 11”
Weight: 7672.89 lbs.
Colors: Blue and black
Fighting Style: black belt in 8-legged kung fu and a brown belt in web matches
Owners: jbleich
Head Coach: rommvon
Asst OC: taurran
DC: Soul Reaper
ST Coach: Talcion


And their opponents……………

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4IYrtNWbAh0
Entering Thunder Dome wearing the red and gold trunks, standing 7” 7” tall and tipping the scales at just over 8500 lbs, they have a 18-1 record with 10 wins by blow out, being led to the ring by their ring leaders Lemdog and CaboWabo, they are captains of cool, the masters of baters, the lords of dogtown, the newly crowned Zeta conference champions for season 14, the C-Town Hoodlums!!!
The Hood is fresh off a 6 point win over the Stewart Ballers in the Zeta title fight. They just came here straight from Roscoe’s Chicken and Waffles (chicken so dry you gotta’ eat it in the rain) and are primed to take on the Spiders.

Zeta Champions: C-Town Hoodlums
Hometown: C-Town………………just C-Town.
Record: 18-1
Height: 7’ 7”
Weight: 8500 lbs.
Colors: Red and gold
Fighting Style: black belt in black belt making, brown pants in shit talking and a PHD in kick you in the nuts take your wallet and piss on you when your down fighting (it really is a fighting style).
Owners: Lemdog, CaboWabo
Head Coach: Ubasstards
OC: Derek McFadden, Stobie (Asst OC)
DC: gocincinnati, GTW21 (Asst DC), Genoc1de (Asst DC)
ST Coach: UCLABUCSFAN
Scouts: Duckfan127, Ahrens858, GManV2, jesusbong

The Spiders have the advantage in leg appendages, Gold Trophy’s and shoes in their closet, but the Hood has the edge in GM’s, wins on the season and smart fashion sense.
It will be an explosive match up and should be a close one, so I will predict…………..

C-Town Hoodlums – 31
Sofia Spiders – 24


Now on with the show!
It's time for both teams to let their GLBalls shine!!
So good luck to both teams in the finals!



Well I’ve said it in every issue since the very first Sports Page and it is only fitting that it be said before such a grand finale!
So here we go……………

Ladies and gentlemen!
Boys and girls of all ages!
Mr. and Mrs. America, all the ships at sea, to all our troops around the world and all the chuckle heads around the globe……………….

.........………LET’S DO THIS SHIT!!!


****ALPHA CONFERENCE PLAYOFFS****

Season 14 Zeta Conference Champions
Sofia Spiders (17-2)


The Rest of Alpha
#2 Short Bus Allstars (18-1) LW1 – Well Short Bus, it was a great ride, up until that last game. And sadly enough it was the last game for the Short Bus. Two league titles and three silvers was a great run, thanks for the great memories and good luck to sean1979 and the rest of the Allstars.
So welcome to the Hot Chick Lounge and I give you guys a very respectful…….SALUTE!!!
Thanks for playing.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2007/08Gigi/Gigi-01.jpg
#3 Arkadak Arsenal (13-5)
#4 Minsk Ninjas (13-5)
#5 Tyrrhenian Sea Wasps (12-5)
#6 Old School (11-6)
#7 Buda Pests (11-6)
#8 Sarajevo Black Hand (9-8)
#9 Ares Assassins (7-9) LW9
#10 Stirling Four Horsemen (6-10) LW10
#11 Ukraine Freight Train (6-10) LW11
#12 Munich ManiAx (5-11) LW12
#13 Alexandrovsk Conquerors (4-12) LW13
#14 Vladivostok Voodoo (3-13) LW14
#15 Hollywood TimberWolves (1-15) LW15
#16 Saratov Catrades (0-16) LW16


*****ROUND 3 ALPHA CONFERENCE PREDICTIONS*****

Here's my Alpha prediction record week by week.

Week 1: 5-3 Week 2: 5-3 Week 3: 6-2 Week 4: 5-3 Week 5: 5-3 Week 6: 7-1 Week 7: 7-1 Week 8: 6-2 Week 9: 7-1 Week 10: 6-2 Week 11: 8-0 Week 14: 7-1 Week 15: 8-0 Week 16: 8-0

Overall: 90-22
SA’s GOW: 9-5
Magic 8 Ball’s GOW: 5-9
SA Playoffs: 6-1
8-ball Playoffs: 2-5

SA's Pick: C-Town Hoodlums
8-Ball's Pick: C-Town Hoodlums


____________________________________________________________________________

****ZETA CONFERENCE PLAYOFFS****

Season 14 Zeta Conference Champions
C-Town Hoodlums (18-1)


The Rest of Zeta
#2 Stewart Ballers (17-2) LW2 – Well Stewart you guys ended up getting your balls snipped in the Zeta title game, but that just means you won’t get any of the girls in the Hot Chick Lounge all knocked up.
Thanks for playing.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2007/11Tiffanie/TIffanie-05.jpg
#3 Stryden Blitzkrieg Balls (16-2)
#4 Vilnius Velociraptors (12-6)
#5 Chernobyl Aftermath (10-7)
#6 Nolaha K&B Purple Spider Pigs (10-7)
#7 Buffalo WarZone (9-8)
#8 Portland Niners (9-8)
#9 Rome Raiders (8-8)
#11 Jefferson City Bucks (7-9)
#12 Russian Revolution (3-13)
#13 Hellas Hoplites (3-13)
#14 Odessa Mojo (2-13)
#15 Bucharest Warriors (2-13)
#16 The Cape Town Cubicles (0-16)


*****ROUND 3 ZETA CONFERENCE PREDICTIONS*****

Here’s my Zeta prediction record week by week.

Week 1: 5-3 Week 2: 7-1 Week 3: 7-1 Week 4: 6-2 Week 5: 7-1 Week 6: 6-2 Week 7: 7-1 week 8: 6-2 Week 9: 7-1 Week 10: 6-2 Week 11: 5-3 Week 14: 7-1 Week 15: 7-1 Week 16: 6-2

Overall: 89-23
SA’s GOW: 10-4
Magic 8 Ball’s GOW: 6-8
SA Playoffs: 6-1
8-ball Playoffs: 3-4

SA's Pick: C-Town Hoodlums
8-Ball's Pick: C-Town Hoodlums

So... uhhh... we gotta give the Pimp Cup back?

Dude, it's still got some Peanut M&Ms in it... I was using it as a candy dish.

MR T supports this thread

SA, I gotta say that I don't think anyone can do a better write up in all of GLB

As happy as I am that we made WL I will miss ya and everyone else here

Hood will still hang out from time to time if y'all don't mind

Originally posted by Smiling Assasain
Well I’ve said it in every issue since the very first Sports Page and it is only fitting that it be said before such a grand finale!
So here we go……………

Ladies and gentlemen!
Boys and girls of all ages!
Mr. and Mrs. America, all the ships at sea, to all our troops around the world and all the chuckle heads around the globe……………….

.........………LET’S DO THIS SHIT!!!

I'm with Lem, gonna miss these next season. Great work!

Well, if you tossed him a lolGM... or tossed off on his lolGM... then he may promote to WL witcha.

SA is the best. one of my favorite agents in the game by far. He takes my shit the right way, and just makes the entire experience better.

Originally posted by adamantenigma
So... uhhh... we gotta give the Pimp Cup back?
Dude, it's still got some Peanut M&Ms in it... I was using it as a candy dish.
Yes, it gets passed on to each new winner, I'm too cheap to buy a new one every season, yet I pay for depraved porn every month. A guy's gotta' have his priorities straight I guess.
Funky Bunch used it as a bed pan. I'm still trying to bleach the stains off of it. But don't you worry, Hood and Spiders, it will be professionally cleaned and twice sanitized for the crowning ceremony.

Originally posted by adamantenigma
Well, if you tossed him a lolGM... or tossed off on his lolGM... then he may promote to WL witcha.
Thanks man, now everyone thinks I'm a slut.

Originally posted by GMathiasf
SA is the best. one of my favorite agents in the game by far. He takes my shit the right way, and just makes the entire experience better.
Originally posted by lemdog
SA, I gotta say that I don't think anyone can do a better write up in all of GLB
As happy as I am that we made WL I will miss ya and everyone else here
Hood will still hang out from time to time if y'all don't mind
Originally posted by gocincinnati
I'm with Lem, gonna miss these next season. Great work!
thank GMathias for bringing me up here, oh and the Bucks, Freight Train, Short Bus and ManiAx.
They all sent me lolGM titles because I'm such a dirty slut, hmmmmm Adam?


Good luck to both teams in the finals. It should be a goodun' no matter what........LET'S DO THIS SHIT!!!

Best of luck Spiders! Should be a good one I hope.

I am more important than rommvon, truth be told