Warrior General Games

That’s it! Week 16 is here!
We did it! We made it to week 16!
Give yourselves a pat on the ass for making it this far!
But we aren’t done yet, there is playoffs to be played!
So for you lucky 16 EE Pro teams that get chosen after the last game to make it to the season 14 post season fiesta, hold on tight to those championship dreams……………..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8TLmpL2AzLs


Who is going to the Prom?
There are still invitations to be sent out in Zeta where there are 7 teams fighting over 4 playoff spots.
This week will decide who the hot prom queens are and who the ugly chicks that didn’t get asked to the prom are.
I doesn’t matter to me if your hot or ugly, if you’re going with me you will get felt up.
(in no particular order)

Alpha:
1) Short Bus Allstars
2) Sofia Spiders
3) Minsk Ninjas
4) Arkadak Arsenal
5) Tyrrhenian Sea Wasps
6) Old School
7) Buda Pests
8) Sarajevo Black Hand

Zeta:
1) Stewart Ballers
2) Stryden Blitzkrieg Balls
3) C-Town Hoodlums
4) Vilnius Velociraptors
5) ?
6) ?
7) ?
8) ?



Standing Room Only at the Lounge!
Each week we get more and more applicants to the Lounge and we are now at standing room only at the Lounge.
The Ares Assassins and the Stirling Four Horsemen are now the latest entrants into the Hot Chick Lounge. The Assassins are CPU, which means the are high priority Lounge applicants and Stirling just notched loss #9 which means the Department of Hot Chick Lounge Security has upgraded your Hot Chick Lounge Terror Alert Status to red, better luck in season 15 and as always……………….
…………..thanks for playing.


***SA’s Player of the Week***
And the POW goes to………………
Nolaha HB’s Hung B. lodawaste and Short Slow and Sleazy for their rushing performance against the Niners.
Hung racked up 276 yards on the ground with 3 TD’s and Sleazy tallied 194 yards rushing with 1 TD. They combined for a whopping 470 yards rushing and 4 TD’s as they bulldozed the Niners in week 15.
So here’s to you, Hung B. lodawaste and Short Slow and Sleazy.………………..
http://i378.photobucket.com/albums/oo227/jason41470/GuinnessBeer.jpg
SALUTE!!


Who will take the limo to the EE Pro Prom?
Who is taking their sister?
This is the last time I will be taking questions this season so get it out of your system and then read the Sport’s Page, chuckleheads!


My Great, great, great, great grand pappy SA used to sing this lull-a-bye to me when I was just a wee, little SA.
“Lull-a-bye and goodnight
Shut your big bloodshot eyes.
You’re a stupid little prick
So go to sleep and…………………

………………….LET’S DO THIS SHIT!!!”………somehow that doesn’t sound so good now that I’m older.


You may or may not agree with them, but this is how I see them.

****ALPHA CONFERENCE POWER RANKINGS****

LW = Last Week ranking
* = Play Off spot clinched


*#1 Short Bus Allstars (15-0) LW1 - Get the W and let’s go face the Black Hand again in Round 1.
Oh the life of a #1 team.
Next opponent: #8 Sarajevo Black Hand (9-6)

*#2 Sofia Spiders (13-2) LW2 - Say what you gotta’ say in the GOW!
Next opponent: #3 Arkadak Arsenal (12-3)

*#3 Arkadak Arsenal (12-3) LW3 – Gentlemen, start your boners. It’s GOW time.
Next opponent: at #2 Sofia Spiders (13-2)

*#4 Minsk Ninjas (11-4) LW4 - 12-4, in the top 4 and ready for a playoff run.
Now that is a good season!
Next opponent: #16 Saratov Catrades (0-15)

*#5 Tyrrhenian Sea Wasps (11-4) LW5 - Even if you guys win, you will still be #5.
So I don’t think it will matter who you end up playing in Round 1. You guys played teams 2-5 awfully close, so just get ready for one of those teams and maybe things will swing your way this time around.
Next opponent: at #6 Old School (11-4)

*#6 Old School (11-4) LW6 - Win = 5th place.
Lose = 6th place.
You guys played Sofia, Arkadak and Minsk really well, so I don’t think it will matter who you play in Round 1. You guys are a tough team to beat anyways.
Next opponent: #5 Tyrrhenian Sea Wasps (11-4)

*#7 Buda Pests (10-5) LW7 - Get the win and rest up for the post season. 7th place is where you should be for the post season, so get ready for Sofia or Arkadak.
Next opponent: #10 Stirling Four Horsemen (6-9)

*#8 Sarajevo Black Hand (9-6) LW8 - Hey, you’re in and that’s good enough for me.
You’ll probably have to face Short Bus this week and in Round 1.
Sorry.
Next opponent: at #1 Short Bus Allstars (15-0)

#9 Ares Assassins (7-8) LW9 - When you are CPU, it’s to the Hot Chick Lounge with you.
Thanks for playing.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2007/01Amanda/Amanda-40.jpg
Next opponent: at #13 Alexandrovsk Conquerors (3-12)

#10 Stirling Four Horsemen (6-9) LW10 - Well that makes the ninth L of the season and that means it’s………………..HOT CHICK LOUNGE!!!!!
The girls were very excited when I told them you guys were headed their way. They thought I said “hung like a horse” and not Horsemen. Better stuff a sock down your pants if you aren’t.
Thanks for playing.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2007/03Britanny/Brittany-01.jpg
Next opponent: at #7 Buda Pests (10-5)

#11 Ukraine Freight Train (5-10) LW11 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2007/02Christine/Christine-52.jpg
Next opponent: #15 Hollywood TimberWolves (1-14)

#12 Munich ManiAx (4-11) LW12 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2007/02Claudia/Claudia-35.jpg
Next opponent: at #14 Vladivostok Voodoo (3-12)

#13 Alexandrovsk Conquerors (3-12) LW13 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2007/01Diana/Diana-27.jpg
Next opponent: #9 Ares Assassins (7-8)

#14 Vladivostok Voodoo (3-12) LW14 – Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2007/01Bobbi/Bobbi-06.jpg
Next opponent: #12 Munich ManiAx

#15 Hollywood TimberWolves (1-14) LW15 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2007/01Simone/Simone-01.jpg
Next opponent: at #11 Ukraine Freight Train (5-10)

#16 Saratov Catrades (0-15) LW16 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2007/02Laura/Laura-08.jpg
Next opponent: at #4 Minsk Ninjas (11-4)


*****WEEK 16 ALPHA CONFERENCE PREDICTIONS*****

So I’ll keep track of my predictions week by week just to see if I am any dam good. In the Game of the Week's (GOW) I'll go up against my old pal, the On Line Magic 8 Ball http://av.vet.ksu.edu/flash/8ball/
Yes, I really do consult an On Line Magic 8 Ball.

Here's my prediction record week by week.

Week 1: 5-3 Week 2: 5-3 Week 3: 6-2 Week 4: 5-3 Week 5: 5-3 Week 6: 7-1 Week 7: 7-1 Week 8: 6-2 Week 9: 7-1 Week 10: 6-2 Week 11: 8-0 Week 14: 7-1 Week 15: 8-0

Overall: 82-22
SA’s GOW: 8-5
Magic 8 Ball’s GOW: 5-8


#3 Arkadak Arsenal (12-3) at #2 Sofia Spiders (13-2) = Sofia Spiders
Game Rating: 6/6 beers + you better have a swig or two of Hennessy

#5 Tyrrhenian Sea Wasps (11-4) at #6 Old School (11-4) = Tyrrhenian Sea Wasps
Game Rating: 5/6 beers

#8 Sarajevo Black Hand (9-6) at #1 Short Bus Allstars (15-0) = Short Bus Allstars
Game Rating: 4/6 beers

#10 Stirling Four Horsemen (6-9) at #7 Buda Pests (10-5) = Buda Pests
Game Rating: 2/6 beers

#9 Ares Assassins (7-8) at #13 Alexandrovsk Conquerors (3-12) = Alexandrovsk Conquerors
Game Rating: 1/6 beers

#12 Munich ManiAx at #14 Vladivostok Voodoo (3-12) = Munich ManiAx
Game Rating: 2/6 beers

#15 Hollywood TimberWolves (1-14) at #11 Ukraine Freight Train (5-10) = Ukraine Freight Train
Game Rating: 1/6 beers

#16 Saratov Catrades (0-15) at #4 Minsk Ninjas (11-4) = Minsk Ninjas
Game Rating: 1/6 beers


*Game Of The Week* (GOW)
#3 Arkadak Arsenal (12-3) at #2 Sofia Spiders (13-2) –
Arkadak, the city that never winks, was founded by German monks who named it Arkadak, which means a dolphin’s anus.
Spiders were a mythological creature that made clay pottery for the ancient Greeks.
These two teams were made to play each other in THUNDER DOME!!!
Two teams enter!
One team leaves!
Rules? Do we need rules for the final Alpha GOW?......uhm, no.
But if we were to have rules, they would be this:
No using the natural webbing in your abdomen to subdue your opponents, but you may build web slinging wrist bands like the comic book Spider Man did.
No abusing dolphin’s or their anuses, unless of course they were taunting you about the name of your city meaning a dolphin’s anus. Then, and only then, is it ok.
Good luck to both chuckleheads in the final GOW of season 14!
Ok, Bort! Let’s turn the servers on and get to simming this mofo! It’s the last one of the season, so make it a goodun’!
*sniffle* I promised myself I wouldn’t cry. *sniffle*
Magic 8 Ball says: http://av.vet.ksu.edu/flash/8ball
Question: Will the Arsenal beat the Spiders?
8 Ball's answer: As I see it, yes.
SA's Pick: Sofia Spiders
Magic 8 Ball Pick: Arkadak Arsenal

22/48 beers! – Look out Alpha-maniacs! There are 3 great match ups coming your way to end the regular season!
The Black Hand take the last shot of the season at the Short Bus to try and blemish their perfect complexion!
The Sea Wasps and Old School will be duking it out in a final rankings battle of season 14!
And just for shits and LOL’s, we called the Arkadak Arsenal and told them we had some huge news to tell them at Thunder Dome, unbeknownst to them we did the same thing to the Sofia Spiders as well. When they see each other at Thunder Dome, we will shut and lock the doors and let the wackiness ensue!!
Candid Camera ain’t got shit on the Sport’s Page!

Let’s do this shit!!


Good luck to all the teams in the Alpha!

____________________________________________________________________________


****ZETA CONFERENCE POWER RANKINGS****

LW = Last Week Ranking
* = Play Off spot clinched


*#1 Stewart Ballers (15-0) LW1 - Nothin’ but a GOW thang!
Next opponent: at #3 C-Town Hoodlums (14-1)

*#2 Stryden Blitzkrieg Balls (14-1) LW2 - Well you guys will definitely get a win in game 16.
You guys will definitely make the playoffs.
You guys are definitely a top 3 team.
The only question left to answer is, how far you guys go in the post season and that is all up to you guys.
Next opponent: #13 Hellas Hoplites (3-12)

*#3 C-Town Hoodlums (14-1) LW3 - G…..O…..W!!!
Next opponent: #1 Stewart Ballers (15-0)

*#4 Vilnius Velociraptors (10-5) LW4 - Well you are in the playoffs, get a W in your last game and you are guaranteed the #4 seed and you play the Revolution next.
This is just like finding really good porn. Ahhhhhh.
Next opponent: at #12 Russian Revolution (3-12)

#5 Chernobyl Aftermath (9-6) LW5 - Still not in? Time to bring out the nukes, chuckleheads!
Situation Report:
- It’s simple, chuckleheads. Just win. Do that and you are in. Lose and………..well, better off not thinking about that.
- Lose and you will need Buffalo or Portland to lose to be invited.
Next opponent: #7 Belgrade Blaze (8-7)

#6 Nolaha K&B Purple Spider Pigs (9-6) LW7 - Win or lose, I think you guys are in.
Welcome to the playoffs, Spider Pigs.
Situation Report:
- All you have to do is win. Odessa is next so congrats on that win.
- You have wins over Portland and Buffalo, so that helps.
Next opponent: #14 Odessa Mojo (2-13)

#7 Belgrade Blaze (8-7) LW8 - Can you say “in charge of your own destiny”?
Well you are, how does it feel?
Should you lose, you will have to rely on the generosity of others to get in and the other teams are some greedy bastards.
Situation Report:
- Win. First and foremost, just win this last game. You have wins over Portland and Buffalo, so your future is all up to you.
- Should you lose you will need Buffalo or Portland to lose to get in.
Next opponent: at #5 Chernobyl Aftermath (9-6)

#8 Buffalo WarZone (8-7) LW9 - Forget about the WarZone and get your asses into the end zone, hopefully more times than your opponent.
With Bucharest up next, you should just make a campfire in the end zone and put up a tent, you will be there ALL day.
Situation Report:
- Win. Win and you’re in.
- Should you lose, you will need Portland to lose to get in.
Next opponent: at #15 Bucharest Warriors (2-13)

#9 Portland Niners (8-7) LW6 - Like a fat kid skating on thin ice, something has to give.
Get to work or it’s to the showers with you………….prison showers, that is.
Situation Report:
- You need to win AND Belgrade or Buffalo has to lose for you to get in.
- Should you lose, it’s all over.
Next opponent: at #10 Jefferson City Bucks (7-8)

#10 Jefferson City Bucks (7-8) LW10 - Believe it or not, these guys are still alive. But only hanging on by an ass hair.
Situation Report:
- You have to win PLUS, you need Belgrade to lose.
- If you won your last game, that would give you a W over Portland, but you lost to Buffalo. So you need Belgrade to lose + your win to get in.
- Should you lose, kiss your Buck asses goodbye.
Next opponent: #9 Portland Niners (8-7)

#11 Rome Raiders (7-8) LW11 - Wait. Is there something different about you guys?
Did you guys lose some weight or did you get a new logo?
Whatever it is, don’t stop doing it.
Situation Report:
- Well what you need to do 1st is win and with Cape Town that is a given.
- Jeff City, Buffalo and Belgrade all need to lose.
- Should you lose, well they say Rome wasn’t built in a day, but your season could be over in a game.
Next opponent: at #16 The Cape Town Cubicles (0-15)

#12 Russian Revolution (3-12) LW12 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2007/03Baroka/Baroka-01.jpg
Next opponent: #4 Vilnius Velociraptors (10-5)

#13 Hellas Hoplites (3-12) LW13 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2007/03Nichole/Nichole-01.jpg
Next opponent: at #2 Stryden Blitzkrieg Balls (14-1)

#14 Odessa Mojo (2-13) LW14 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2007/04Katie/Katie-03.jpg
Next opponent: at #7 Nolaha K&B Purple Spider Pigs (9-6)

#15 Bucharest Warriors (2-13) LW15 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2007/04Brittany/Brittany-03.jpg
Next opponent: #8 Buffalo WarZone (8-7)

#16 The Cape Town Cubicles (0-15) LW16 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2007/04Jennie/Jennie-01.jpg
Next opponent: #11 Rome Raiders (7-8)


*****WEEK 16 ZETA CONFERENCE PREDICTIONS*****

Here's my prediction record week by week.

Week 1: 5-3 Week 2: 7-1 Week 3: 7-1 Week 4: 6-2 Week 5: 7-1 Week 6: 6-2 Week 7: 7-1 week 8: 6-2 Week 9: 7-1 Week 10: 6-2 Week 11: 5-3 Week 14: 7-1 Week 15: 7-1

Overall: 83-21
SA’s GOW: 10-3
Magic 8 Ball’s GOW: 6-7


#1 Stewart Ballers (15-0) at #3 C-Town Hoodlums (14-1) = Stewart Ballers
Game Rating: 6/6 beers + throw in a bottle of Wild Turkey, this is a biggun’!

#7 Belgrade Blaze (8-7) at #5 Chernobyl Aftermath (9-6) = Belgrade Blaze
Game Rating: 5/6 beers

#9 Portland Niners (8-7) at #10 Jefferson City Bucks (7-8) = Portland Niners
Game Rating: 4/6 beers

#4 Vilnius Velociraptors (10-5) at #12 Russian Revolution (3-12) = Vilnius Velociraptors
Game Rating: 2/6 beers

#13 Hellas Hoplites (3-12) at #2 Stryden Blitzkrieg Balls (14-1) = Stryden Blitzkrieg Balls
Game Rating: 2/6 beers

#14 Odessa Mojo (2-13) at #7 Nolaha K&B Purple Spider Pigs (9-6) = Nolaha K&B Purple Spider Pigs
Game Rating: 2/6 beers

#8 Buffalo WarZone (8-7) at #15 Bucharest Warriors (2-13) = Buffalo WarZone
Game Rating: 1/6 beers

#11 Rome Raiders (7-8) at #16 The Cape Town Cubicles (0-15) = Rome Raiders
Game Rating: 1/6 beers


*Game Of The Week* (GOW)
#1 Stewart Ballers (15-0) at #3 C-Town Hoodlums (14-1) –
Welcome to the very last Zeta GOW of season 14!
And what a great day it is for a final Zeta GOW of season 14!
Today we have “The Hoodlum’s Ball”!
Hoodlum’s vs Ballers in a battle that could quite possibly throw the earthy off of it’s axis by a few centimeters and causing us to lose precious seconds out of the day!
I know a few seconds doesn’t sound like much, but it means a whole hell of a lot to a guy that is constantly surfing internet pay-per-minute porn sites! I’m looking at you Chadj19!
A win for the Hood would be good.
A win for the Ballers will make you holler!
It’s a battle for #1 supremacy in all the land of Zeta and these two mega teams are not backing down one bit!
Will C-Town wear the crown?
Or will Stewart………..uhm, well….ok, I couldn’t think of anything to rhyme with Stewart, but I tell you right now that if I could figure out something to rhyme with Stewart, it would be something big and menacing and really scare the poop out of you!
Goods luck you chuckleheads!
Magic 8 Ball says: http://av.vet.ksu.edu/flash/8ball
Question: Will the Ballers beat the Hoodlums?
8 Ball's answer: It is certain.
SA's Pick: Stewart Ballers
Magic 8 Ball Pick: Stewart Ballers

23/48 beers! – A most excellent week 16 for Zeta!
Three exciting match ups to think of while shtupping the wife, GF or mistress!
The Jeff City Bucks need a win to be considered for a post season berth, but it will be hard to come by against the Niners!
Belgrade and Chernobyl fight it out for one of the few remaining playoff spots left!
And in the GOW, we spared no expense and put the Ballers and Hoodlums in the final regular season GOW in Zeta!
That should help you keep going at it with the old wife, GF or mistress!
I just ask one thing, at the initial moment of penetration just yell out at the top of your lungs, “Thank you, SA!!!!”

Let’s do this shit!!


Good luck to all the teams in Zeta!

dolphins anus? did not know that ...

Originally posted by evileyez
dolphins anus? did not know that ...

The Sport's Page is often informational and educational and ALWAYS 100% correct.

Hood is Good nuff said

It should be a helluva game tomorrow, I already have my popcorn ready just to be safe

Originally posted by lemdog
Hood is Good nuff said

It should be a helluva game tomorrow, I already have my popcorn ready just to be safe

don't forget to get some of those Thunder Dome nachos too.
They go in at Thunder Dome and come out in the Thunder Bowl.

Good luck Hood, Ballers, Arsenal and Spiders in the GOW's.

Originally posted by Smiling Assasain
#7 Belgrade Blaze (8-7) LW8 - Can you say “in charge of your own destiny”?
Well you are, how does it feel?
Should you lose, you will have to rely on the generosity of others to get in and the other teams are some greedy bastards.
Situation Report:
- Win. First and foremost, just win this last game. You have wins over Portland and Buffalo, so your future is all up to you.
- Should you lose you will need Buffalo or Portland to lose to get in.
Next opponent: at #5 Chernobyl Aftermath (9-6)


And you didnt think we'd get to this point.......but i believe you're right about one thing when i told you i thought we could reach .500....8-8 wont get us into the playoffs. If we lose, it's not as simple as Portland or Buffalo losing. Buffalo is a lock win against bucharest so their in.

Portland plays the Bucks....if Bucks win...they are also tied with us now at 8-8. Rome also has a cakewalk to finish 8-8. Blaze(1-2),Portland(1-2),Bucks(3-0),Rome(1-2) all at 8-8 for #8 seed........Bucks advance based on head to head records

For the Blaze it's win and get the #6 seed or go home.

Originally posted by Smiling Assasain

#13 Hellas Hoplites (3-12) at #2 Stryden Blitzkrieg Balls (14-1) = Stewart Ballers
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
If this happens I will be very surprised.

Originally posted by savagerebel

If this happens I will be very surprised.

SA said these are 100% correct; call your bookie

Originally posted by evileyez
SA said these are 100% correct; call your bookie

booked.

Originally posted by Tigroklaws
Portland plays the Bucks....if Bucks win...they are also tied with us now at 8-8. Rome also has a cakewalk to finish 8-8. Blaze(1-2),Portland(1-2),Bucks(3-0),Rome(1-2) all at 8-8 for #8 seed........Bucks advance based on head to head records

For the Blaze it's win and get the #6 seed or go home.
That's what we're banking on; and we're big fans of Chernobyl this week so the Bucks can control our own destiny.

... don't know ya, so can't hate ya, but we're hoping you go down in a Blaze .

dammit where is my popcorn.

Originally posted by Ahrens858
dammit where is my popcorn.

i'll get you some brotha

Originally posted by lemdog
i'll get you some brotha

COME GET SOME BITCHES

Good stuff. Should be a very interesting final week of the season. Still alot to play for for alot of teams.

Great read as AWLAYS.