Oh Kampers, how could you do this to us? Counting scrimmages for sweet, sweet power ranking glory, this is an outrage! Suck it up, sissies, if you don't like it, try next year. This is USA Pro and scrims are super, super important for our rep. On to the rankings:
1) Northwest Mighthawks - Eh, fuck it, you know this is as much of a joke as I do. Goddamn supercomputer is worse than Florida fans.
2) Minnesota Marauders - 18 points allowed in 4 scrims against the likes of the Gurupies and Blaze. That's tops in my love book.
3) Washington Wolfpack - Loss to CCCC knocks them out of the non-Mighthawk top spot for now.
4) Lincoln Navigators - I'm not really sure what goes on here. Kampers lose to the Woodys, and Lincoln beats them 80-7. But then Lincoln lost to Alpine 13-45, while the Kampers held the Golfers to 2 FGs. Probably a wash. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cZr-O6olCY4
5) Nashville Hounds - Solidly in tier 2 with Lincoln and Ketchikan, although I'm sure they'll bitch about that.
6) Ketchikan Kamper Adventure Rentals - Halfhearted scrim efforts do not impress the supercomputer, and the Alpine win was tainted by Running With The Devil sitting out.
7) Portland Aftershocks - This AAA team racked up a pretty good preseason effort, losing by 1 to the Blaze and 2 to the Gurupies. Probably the most impressive scrim schedule of the newcomers.
8) Spokane Privateers - Blown out by CCCC and OFG, but there's no real shame in that. This dude with a credit card is gonna beat some people.
9) San Diego Demolition - No matter how bad everyone else beats them, they're still going to school Ketchikan.
10) Timpanogos Thunder - Eh, that wasn't a bad preseason, guys.
11) New Jersey Battalion - Won't be relegated, probably.
12) Dread City Diabolicals - Not good.
13) Chicago Hedgehogs - I don't care what you were doing, a 4 point win over Richey does not bode well.
14) Carson City Cubes - Yikes.
15) Laredo Lesbians - I hope for their sake that they're screwing around.
16) West Scranton Invaders - Showing signs of life?
1) Northwest Mighthawks - Eh, fuck it, you know this is as much of a joke as I do. Goddamn supercomputer is worse than Florida fans.
2) Minnesota Marauders - 18 points allowed in 4 scrims against the likes of the Gurupies and Blaze. That's tops in my love book.
3) Washington Wolfpack - Loss to CCCC knocks them out of the non-Mighthawk top spot for now.
4) Lincoln Navigators - I'm not really sure what goes on here. Kampers lose to the Woodys, and Lincoln beats them 80-7. But then Lincoln lost to Alpine 13-45, while the Kampers held the Golfers to 2 FGs. Probably a wash. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cZr-O6olCY4
5) Nashville Hounds - Solidly in tier 2 with Lincoln and Ketchikan, although I'm sure they'll bitch about that.
6) Ketchikan Kamper Adventure Rentals - Halfhearted scrim efforts do not impress the supercomputer, and the Alpine win was tainted by Running With The Devil sitting out.
7) Portland Aftershocks - This AAA team racked up a pretty good preseason effort, losing by 1 to the Blaze and 2 to the Gurupies. Probably the most impressive scrim schedule of the newcomers.
8) Spokane Privateers - Blown out by CCCC and OFG, but there's no real shame in that. This dude with a credit card is gonna beat some people.
9) San Diego Demolition - No matter how bad everyone else beats them, they're still going to school Ketchikan.
10) Timpanogos Thunder - Eh, that wasn't a bad preseason, guys.
11) New Jersey Battalion - Won't be relegated, probably.
12) Dread City Diabolicals - Not good.
13) Chicago Hedgehogs - I don't care what you were doing, a 4 point win over Richey does not bode well.
14) Carson City Cubes - Yikes.
15) Laredo Lesbians - I hope for their sake that they're screwing around.
16) West Scranton Invaders - Showing signs of life?
