COLUMBUS (AP) -- Vacationing at home with his family for the holiday, Brand X center Haole took time out from a pie-eating contest to complain to anyone within earshot that the team's quarterback, Darkus Black, likes to touch him inappropriately during snaps.
"The first time, I was like, woah dude, that's the wrong ball," Haole said in between voracious gulps of Milwaukee's Best. "The second time, I was all like, what the <bleep> is going on here?"
The rambunctious center went on to describe in painstaking detail nearly every snap since training camp began, painting a disturbing picture of the ofttimes under-reported sexual harassment that can occur at the line of scrimmage.
"I confronted that <bleep>er about it once," Haole bellowed during a fireworks display as people glared in his direction and mothers covered their children's ears. "And he just grinned that stupid <bleep>ing lime-eating grin and said, 'Shut up and take it like the bitch you are.'"
Haole said team officials have refused to acknowledge his complaints, and that he was instructed more than once to keep his "<bleep>ing trap shut."
When asked for comment, team owner Dub J said, "We encourage gay sex between our players. It helps keep the team close together."
"The first time, I was like, woah dude, that's the wrong ball," Haole said in between voracious gulps of Milwaukee's Best. "The second time, I was all like, what the <bleep> is going on here?"
The rambunctious center went on to describe in painstaking detail nearly every snap since training camp began, painting a disturbing picture of the ofttimes under-reported sexual harassment that can occur at the line of scrimmage.
"I confronted that <bleep>er about it once," Haole bellowed during a fireworks display as people glared in his direction and mothers covered their children's ears. "And he just grinned that stupid <bleep>ing lime-eating grin and said, 'Shut up and take it like the bitch you are.'"
Haole said team officials have refused to acknowledge his complaints, and that he was instructed more than once to keep his "<bleep>ing trap shut."
When asked for comment, team owner Dub J said, "We encourage gay sex between our players. It helps keep the team close together."
