Caveat - I'm pulling this out of my ass. I don;t have the time to scout everyone's team and their opponent's team and then try to come up with a real game prediction. I'm just looking at record, chemistry, previous game performance and maybe 'strength of schedule' counting the pre-season games. And even that sounds too complex for me to do in a short amount of time before the games actually sim.
Eastern Conference: http://goallineblitz.com/game/league.pl?league_id=41&conference_id=82&playoffs=0
Note, games are not listed at the time of the creation of these predictions so I am going down the list and listing the games from the present top seed to the bottom. With the Eastern Conference I am not really seeing a lot of competitive games this week and I think for the most part, the favoured team is the team with the better record)
Game #1 - Chinese Bandits (#1 2-0) vs Pennsylvania Steagles (#10 0-2) -- http://goallineblitz.com/game/compare_teams.pl?team1=1580&team2=383 -- The Chinese Bandits and their 1.2 billion screaming fans are interestingly enough, not known for bringing shoddy goods like most other Chinese exports. They are going to bring another outstanding effort and win this game handily. Sorry Steagles, Bandits 77-48.
Game #2 - New York Mustangs (#2 2-0) vs Biggold Brawlers (#12 0-2) -- http://goallineblitz.com/game/compare_teams.pl?team1=1773&team2=91 -- The stampede is on, and there's just nno way the Brawlers are going to be able to move out of the way. Mustangs win 116 - 30.
Game #3 - Dalton Dragons (#3 2-0) vs Houston Oil Rig Workers (#13 0-2) -- http://goallineblitz.com/game/compare_teams.pl?team1=1589&team2=726 -- Anyone knows what happens when Oil comes in contact with a strong source of heat? That's right.. inferno. This is going to be ugly folks. I'd suggest the fans stay away from the stadium to avoid smoke inhalation and chronic lung ailments due to the inhalation of noxious fumes as the Dragons torch the Oil Riggers in a 93-20 massacre.
Game #4 - Toronto Ice Wolves (#4 2-0) vs Cleveland Kardiac Kids (#16 0-2) -- http://goallineblitz.com/game/compare_teams.pl?team1=61&team2=1229 -- beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.... Whats that noise? Its a flat line. Victim, East Cleveland's Kardiac Unit, mauled by the feisty Canadians out for a romp. 42-12 Toronto Awwwoooooooah!
Game #5 - Jacksonville Canaries (#5 1-1) vs Enterprise Venom (#6 1-1) -- http://goallineblitz.com/game/compare_teams.pl?team1=52&team2=1718 -- I'm having a hard time seeing the plucky yellow birds taking down the icky Secret Wars™ space goo. Venom wins the first upset of the week 53-10.
Game #6 - "Quick Stop" Clerks (#7 1-1) vs St. Louis Knights (#9 1-1) -- http://goallineblitz.com/game/compare_teams.pl?team1=1430&team2=1591 -- Do Dante and Randal have what it takes to take on these armoured foes from St. Louis? My guess is that their endless inane but amusing bantar is going to resonate in the helmets of the Knights, confusing them enough to win a squeaker. Clerks win 27-24.
Game #7 - Atlantic City Aces (#8 1-1) vs Detroit Dominators (#15 0-2) -- http://goallineblitz.com/game/compare_teams.pl?team1=758&team2=1263 -- Nothing up the sleeve is necessary for this game. Detroit has fallen on hard times and even New Jersey thinks they are a joke. Aces, Vegas... the real gambling town, has you winning this 113-3.
Game #8 - American Cardinals (#11 0-2) vs Chicago LMG Accountabillibuddies (#14 0-2) -- http://goallineblitz.com/game/compare_teams.pl?team1=856&team2=784 -- As much as I hate typing their name, I think the Accountabillibuddies are going to get their first win of the season against this Cardinals team. 35-21 Chicago.
No ego's were bruised in the writing of this preview. Its purely for fun and not done with any malice or intent to dis your team in any way. I'm pulling shit out of my ass just for entertainment purposes, but if it somehow inspires your loldots, feel free to post it on your respective locker room walls
Eastern Conference: http://goallineblitz.com/game/league.pl?league_id=41&conference_id=82&playoffs=0
Note, games are not listed at the time of the creation of these predictions so I am going down the list and listing the games from the present top seed to the bottom. With the Eastern Conference I am not really seeing a lot of competitive games this week and I think for the most part, the favoured team is the team with the better record)
Game #1 - Chinese Bandits (#1 2-0) vs Pennsylvania Steagles (#10 0-2) -- http://goallineblitz.com/game/compare_teams.pl?team1=1580&team2=383 -- The Chinese Bandits and their 1.2 billion screaming fans are interestingly enough, not known for bringing shoddy goods like most other Chinese exports. They are going to bring another outstanding effort and win this game handily. Sorry Steagles, Bandits 77-48.
Game #2 - New York Mustangs (#2 2-0) vs Biggold Brawlers (#12 0-2) -- http://goallineblitz.com/game/compare_teams.pl?team1=1773&team2=91 -- The stampede is on, and there's just nno way the Brawlers are going to be able to move out of the way. Mustangs win 116 - 30.
Game #3 - Dalton Dragons (#3 2-0) vs Houston Oil Rig Workers (#13 0-2) -- http://goallineblitz.com/game/compare_teams.pl?team1=1589&team2=726 -- Anyone knows what happens when Oil comes in contact with a strong source of heat? That's right.. inferno. This is going to be ugly folks. I'd suggest the fans stay away from the stadium to avoid smoke inhalation and chronic lung ailments due to the inhalation of noxious fumes as the Dragons torch the Oil Riggers in a 93-20 massacre.
Game #4 - Toronto Ice Wolves (#4 2-0) vs Cleveland Kardiac Kids (#16 0-2) -- http://goallineblitz.com/game/compare_teams.pl?team1=61&team2=1229 -- beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.... Whats that noise? Its a flat line. Victim, East Cleveland's Kardiac Unit, mauled by the feisty Canadians out for a romp. 42-12 Toronto Awwwoooooooah!
Game #5 - Jacksonville Canaries (#5 1-1) vs Enterprise Venom (#6 1-1) -- http://goallineblitz.com/game/compare_teams.pl?team1=52&team2=1718 -- I'm having a hard time seeing the plucky yellow birds taking down the icky Secret Wars™ space goo. Venom wins the first upset of the week 53-10.
Game #6 - "Quick Stop" Clerks (#7 1-1) vs St. Louis Knights (#9 1-1) -- http://goallineblitz.com/game/compare_teams.pl?team1=1430&team2=1591 -- Do Dante and Randal have what it takes to take on these armoured foes from St. Louis? My guess is that their endless inane but amusing bantar is going to resonate in the helmets of the Knights, confusing them enough to win a squeaker. Clerks win 27-24.
Game #7 - Atlantic City Aces (#8 1-1) vs Detroit Dominators (#15 0-2) -- http://goallineblitz.com/game/compare_teams.pl?team1=758&team2=1263 -- Nothing up the sleeve is necessary for this game. Detroit has fallen on hard times and even New Jersey thinks they are a joke. Aces, Vegas... the real gambling town, has you winning this 113-3.
Game #8 - American Cardinals (#11 0-2) vs Chicago LMG Accountabillibuddies (#14 0-2) -- http://goallineblitz.com/game/compare_teams.pl?team1=856&team2=784 -- As much as I hate typing their name, I think the Accountabillibuddies are going to get their first win of the season against this Cardinals team. 35-21 Chicago.
No ego's were bruised in the writing of this preview. Its purely for fun and not done with any malice or intent to dis your team in any way. I'm pulling shit out of my ass just for entertainment purposes, but if it somehow inspires your loldots, feel free to post it on your respective locker room walls
So it means bupkiss. (Edit: Though I will admit that its sorta neat seeing that my quick glance at the two teams gave me much the same impression a more detailed look at the raw numbers seem to indicate... That is, this should be a close game decided by a field goal. )
. nice try though
