Warrior General Games

Originally posted by Hans Hammer
IN CLOSING YOU ARE WORSE THAN ME AND YOUR TEAM IS WORSE THAN MY TEAM.

Hans, as a fan of most of your posts, I must admit my disappointment. While this post was certainly one of the most epic of your fabled career, the sentence I have quoted *is nearly grammatically correct*. An outrage! You were one insignificant comma away from throwing your whole reputation down the drain! Think of the children, Hans! So many adoring kids read your posts, wear your jerseys, and endlessly quote your esteemed narratives under the glowing eyes of their proud parents. You must remember that with every action, you set an example for the younger generation.

We're counting on you, Hans. Not just USA BBB#1...not just GLB...but the entire football community.

-A concerned fan

most epic Hammer post occured in the Red Dots forum last week....

Hans responds to a post in his normal All Caps approach.

Bengal4Life asks him to stop typing in all caps.

Hammer's reply?

"I TRY TURN OFF BIG LETTERS BUT IT NOT FUNCTION. WHEN I PUSH CAPS LOCK BUTTON MY LETTERS IS STAY BIG. LOOK. I PUSH IT AND NOTHING HAPPEN. I PUSH IT ONE MORE TIME AND NOTHING IS STILL HAPPEN. THE LIGHT GO ON AND OFF BUT THE LETTERS STAY BIG. I AM ALWAYS PUSH BUTTON TWO TIMES SO I AM CAN BE CERTAIN I PUSH IT RIGHT BUT EVERY TIME THE LETTERS STAY BIG. I NOT KNOW WHAT THE PROBLEM. MAYBE I CALL BILL GATES OR SOME STUFF LIKE THIS. I NEED FIND HE EMAIL ADDRESSING."

LOL!

Originally posted by jktooley
Mills, until your scrub-assed team ever comes close to hanging with us, consider yourself "ignored" for life. I love how you want to still take shots at us off the field, but haven't figure out a way to take shots at us on it.

fuck you dude! your team started a post about how they were the best team ever, i pretty much said they wern't! why do you have to bring my team into this? our srubb ass team was one of the best teams in the east for much of the season, you? you boosted late to win in the playoffs, got not stats in the season, and epically failed in the playoffs. good job. i am glad to see your strategy worked.

at least when the massacre loses, we admit we arn't the best, there was a time when we were, now we are clearly not. you don't see me going around telling people how much better we would be if we boosted, how we should have won that game if it wasn't for this one play, or that one pass! go suck a d man! get the fuck off my back or i will turn around and jam my large veiny cock up your ass!

Originally posted by Hans Hammer

WOW YOU TWO TEAMS IS A REAL SUCK. Over the Rhine MAKED SMALL MISTAKE AND WE IS CORRECT THIS SOON. BUT WE CLOSER TO FINAL WIN AS YOU BOTH. YOU BOTH TERRIBLE AWFUL SUCK SHIT TEAMINGSHIPS.

HERE WHAT I THINK ON YOU TEAM. YOU ARE SMELLING BAD. I HATE YOUS. YOU IS BAD AT FOOTBALLING. DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE. WHY YOU SO UGLY? KILLING YOU. I EATED YOUR FACE. I WALK ON YOU DURING I WEAR MY NAIL SLIPPERS OF PAIN. DO YOU LIKE THE WINNING? NO YOU DONT. YOU KNOW WHAT I AM LIKING ABOUT YOU? THIS IS BEING MOST LIKELY NOT ANYTHING. HEY. YOUR FAVORITE SPORTING TEAM IS SUCK. FUCK. CAN I ALLOWED AM ABLE TO MAY I SAY THAT? I AM NOT CARING. I SAY IT NONEOFTHELESS. BORT THE GOALLINEBLITZ GOD HATES YOU TOO. ZEUS THE GOD GOD OF GOD IS HATES YOU IN ADDITION TOO ALSO AS WELL. YOU REAL BAD. YOU MORE NEGATIVE THINGS. YOUR RACE IS UNSUPERIOR FOR MY RACE. I MEAN THIS NOT IN RACIST WAY SO PLEASE DO NOT BAN MY THREAD OF ME IS BETTER THAN YOU IS. YOU KNOW YOUR MOM? I TOO. VERY GOOD. YOURE SISTER? SAME. YOU KNOW YOUR DAD? I AM FEELING GOOD. THANKING YOU FOR THE ASKING. YOU KNOW YOURE DEAD GRANDPARENT? OH. I SORRY. JUST A JOKE. I AM BEING VERY HAPPY THAT HE IS DEATHED. YOU KNOW YOUR DOG? UH. YOU A LITTLE WEIRD I AM THINKING. YOUR INSIGNIFICANT OTHER? I HAVE MANY SEX WITH HER ON REGULAR BASES. OKAY I MOVE ON TO NEW TOPICS OF SUBJECTS FOR DISCUSSION. NO. I NOT DO THIS. I CONTINUE ON ABOUT YOU BE THE WORSE FOR ALL. YOU SO UGLY THAT I WANT KILL MY KID SO HE NO MORE A SUFFER. I AM HAVING A JOKE. WHAT THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN YOU AND SOMETHING ELSE. SOMETHING ELSE IS NOT SO STUPID!! YOU ARE A DAMN A UGLY A POOP AND SHUT UP. IS IT TRUE YOU GOED TO DOCTOR AND HE CONFIRM YOU ARE HAVE SEX WITH GOATDWARFS? I BELIEVE THIS. DO YOU WANT FIGHT ME? YES? I AM NOT CARING. I FIGHT YOU NONEOFTHELESS AND I WIN THIS FIGHTING AS I KILL YOU. IN CLOSING YOU ARE WORSE THAN ME AND YOUR TEAM IS WORSE THAN MY TEAM. I WIN. YOU LOSE. I AM HAPPY. YOU ARE SAD. YOU ARE UGLY. I AM PRETTY. YOU SMELL BAD. I SMELL VERY VERY GOOD. THE PEOPLE WHO GIVED YOUR BIRTH ARE ALCOHOLICS. THE PEOPLE WHO GIVED MY BIRTH ARE TOO ALSO AS WELL ALCOHOLICS. THIS ONLY COINCIDENCE. YOUR OWNER DOES NOT CARE ABOUT YOU ONE SINGULARY BIT AT ALL. ALL MY OWNER ARE LOVE ME SO MUCH. THEY WANT MAKE LOVE WITH ME. THEY NEVER BUST YOUR FRUITGRAPE. FINISH.

dude, you fucking rock.

So if I'm on your back, your response is to turn around and use your cock? Wouldn't we be sword-fighting at that point? I never said that if you turned around I'd turn around did I? You seriously want to challenge a samurai with a dagger?

Originally posted by Hans Hammer

THE PEOPLE WHO GIVED MY BIRTH ARE TOO ALSO AS WELL ALCOHOLICS.

Suprise!!!!


Originally posted by Hans Hammer

YOUR OWNER DOES NOT CARE ABOUT YOU ONE SINGULARY BIT AT ALL. ALL MY OWNER ARE LOVE ME SO MUCH. THEY WANT MAKE LOVE WITH ME.

What have i gotten myself into?!?!

Originally posted by Hans Hammer

THEY NEVER BUST YOUR FRUITGRAPE.

Again i'd like to know what country you live in; Fruitgrape sounds like a new fruit that i would like to try.

Originally posted by bell 3id



Originally posted by Hans Hammer


THEY NEVER BUST YOUR FRUITGRAPE.

Again i'd like to know what country you live in; Fruitgrape sounds like a new fruit that i would like to try.


Fruitgrape would probably be my new favorite starburst flavor

Originally posted by jktooley
So if I'm on your back, your response is to turn around and use your cock? Wouldn't we be sword-fighting at that point? I never said that if you turned around I'd turn around did I? You seriously want to challenge a samurai with a dagger?

what dick? your a god damn pussy! pussy's can't have dicks.

i'd make you turn around.

although, the question begs the answer: why were you on my back in the first place?

We're dicks! We're reckless, arrogant, stupid dicks. And the BBB #1 members are pussies. Pussies don't like dicks, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes: assholes that just want to shit on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with assholes their way. But the only thing that can fuck an asshole is a dick, with some balls. The problem with dicks is: they fuck too much or fuck when it isn't appropriate - and it takes a pussy to show them that. But sometimes, pussies can be so full of shit that they become assholes themselves... because pussies are an inch and half away from ass holes. I don't know much about this crazy, crazy world, but I do know this: If you don't let us fuck this asshole, we're going to have our dicks and pussies all covered in shit!

Sorry....had to be done

Originally posted by jktooley
most epic Hammer post occured in the Red Dots forum last week....

Hans responds to a post in his normal All Caps approach.

Bengal4Life asks him to stop typing in all caps.

Hammer's reply?

"I TRY TURN OFF BIG LETTERS BUT IT NOT FUNCTION. WHEN I PUSH CAPS LOCK BUTTON MY LETTERS IS STAY BIG. LOOK. I PUSH IT AND NOTHING HAPPEN. I PUSH IT ONE MORE TIME AND NOTHING IS STILL HAPPEN. THE LIGHT GO ON AND OFF BUT THE LETTERS STAY BIG. I AM ALWAYS PUSH BUTTON TWO TIMES SO I AM CAN BE CERTAIN I PUSH IT RIGHT BUT EVERY TIME THE LETTERS STAY BIG. I NOT KNOW WHAT THE PROBLEM. MAYBE I CALL BILL GATES OR SOME STUFF LIKE THIS. I NEED FIND HE EMAIL ADDRESSING."

OMFG!!!!ROFL!!!!!*crying I'm laughing so hard*

Originally posted by GeneralMills92
Originally posted by jktooley

So if I'm on your back, your response is to turn around and use your cock? Wouldn't we be sword-fighting at that point? I never said that if you turned around I'd turn around did I? You seriously want to challenge a samurai with a dagger?

what dick? your a god damn pussy! pussy's can't have dicks.

i'd make you turn around.

although, the question begs the answer: why were you on my back in the first place?

I didn't think I was, but you told me to get off of it. This whole situation has me fucking baffled now.

Originally posted by Kiwi Davidz
We're dicks! We're reckless, arrogant, stupid dicks. And the BBB #1 members are pussies. Pussies don't like dicks, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes: assholes that just want to shit on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with assholes their way. But the only thing that can fuck an asshole is a dick, with some balls. The problem with dicks is: they fuck too much or fuck when it isn't appropriate - and it takes a pussy to show them that. But sometimes, pussies can be so full of shit that they become assholes themselves... because pussies are an inch and half away from ass holes. I don't know much about this crazy, crazy world, but I do know this: If you don't let us fuck this asshole, we're going to have our dicks and pussies all covered in shit!

Sorry....had to be done

damnit, for some reason i can't for the life of me remember what that is from!

Originally posted by GeneralMills92
Originally posted by Kiwi Davidz

We're dicks! We're reckless, arrogant, stupid dicks. And the BBB #1 members are pussies. Pussies don't like dicks, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes: assholes that just want to shit on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with assholes their way. But the only thing that can fuck an asshole is a dick, with some balls. The problem with dicks is: they fuck too much or fuck when it isn't appropriate - and it takes a pussy to show them that. But sometimes, pussies can be so full of shit that they become assholes themselves... because pussies are an inch and half away from ass holes. I don't know much about this crazy, crazy world, but I do know this: If you don't let us fuck this asshole, we're going to have our dicks and pussies all covered in shit!

Sorry....had to be done

damnit, for some reason i can't for the life of me remember what that is from!

Team America. You're welcome.