For those of you that don't know me, which might be a lot of you since I tend to stay in limited forums, I've been doing rankings for a few seasons now over in APL. King asked me if I would, in his own words, pimp USA too so I figured what the hell. I'll give it a shot and hopefully you guys enjoy the BS that I bring to the forums in the form of weekly rankings.
I'm not too familiar with most of the teams here except through name and reputation so if I'm way off than blame KoB for asking me to do this! I don't use any scripts since they stopped working for me so this is all just off the top of my head and probably way off for now but some of it will clear up as the real games get underway.
Tear them apart or award me with proclamations of love for the hard work but most of all enjoy and hopefully they get more entertaining as I learn the teams better.
PRESEASON RANKINGS (R = APL rookies this season, WL = i'm sure you can figure it out)
WESTERN
1 Monmouth Evil Monkeys (13-3)
Very deep and talented squad that had their way with most teams last season. Should continue that path this season as they try to take the next step. They made it as far as the CC game last season and will look to improve on that for season 24.
2 American Terrorists (13-3)
AT had a very good showing last season and will look to build on it this season. The roster is just hitting its peak in some areas so now is the time for them to make some noise. Should be in the thick of the playoff race and most likely looking at a top 4 seed.
3 South Georgia Growl (1-15WL)
Sent down to the Pros from WL, this squad is deep in comparison with some others. They should find a lot of easy pickings this season and will be in the playoff race throughout the season.
4 Tulsa Storm (11-5)
Another tough looking squad that could be in the running for a top 4 seed if they've improved at all this offseason. The squad looks deep and loaded with talent but can they hang with the ATs and MEMs enough to have a better playoff showing this season?
5 Covington Black Knights (7-9)
Deep squad that had a rough season 23. They had a few close losses last season that could have given them a winning record but they'll have to perform better this season if they want to make a run at a playoff spot.
6 Bay Area Bombers (10-6)
BAB is looking to have a better showing this season and with 2 narrow losses last season this could have been a 12-4 team. They were bounced out of the playoffs by MEM in the first round and will have to perform better against some of the stronger teams this season to make that happen.
7 Newfoundland Penguins (9-7)
Nothing strikes fear into opponents like a pack of rabid...penguins. Seriously though, the squad looks decent and they're coming off a 9 win season but they were trounced in the first round of the playoffs. Can they have a better showing this season?
8 Canton Bulldogs (8-8)
Finished last season at .500 and hoping for a better showing this season after ending the postseason in a rout at the hands of the Hedgehogs. Should be in the playoff hunt but seeing this team as a low seed right now.
9 American Predators (4-12)
The Preds are coming off a 4 win season and have to contend with bad chem to start things off. They suffered some big losses last season and it's hard for me to see things turning around this season. Nice mix of talent on the team but they'll need to play much better this season to hang with the tougher teams.
10 5th Masterminds (15-1R)
Another young but solid team. Coming off a 15 win season that saw their playoff run end in the CC game when they failed to stop the one team to beat them in the regular season. After fighting back in the 4th Q to take a 1 point lead they failed to stop their opponent and with 1 second left gave up a game winning FG that sent 5th home instead of to the LC game. The Masterminds show potential and might end up being one of the better new teams in the league this season if their age doesn't hurt them.
11 Stormwind City Gryphons (10-6R)
Solid squad with a good mix of older and younger dots. That should allow them to be competitive against lower ranked teams but how will they handle teams ranked in the top half of the conference?
12 Sin City Spoilers (15-1R)
Another young squad that will struggle this season against top tier teams. The schedule looks to start off easier before hitting a rough patch around midseason through to the end. Will that give them enough time to get a few more levels out of their dots and remain competitive in the second half of the season? They've got talent as they won their league last season through some intense close games but will that translate to wins up in the Pros.
13 Arkham Asylum Jokers (14-2R)
Young, talented squad that got as far as the CC game last season. Will have the usual growing pains due to age but they're deep enough to avoid relegation.
14 Wisconsin Rapids Red Raiders (13-3R)
Bad chem could hurt this squad early and they're also a little young in a few areas. They made it as far as the second round of their league playoffs last season but will find things tougher now that they're in USAPL. Don't see the playoffs in their future this season but could be building the beginnings of a good squad for next season.
15 North Texas Timberwolves (14-2R)
The Timberwolves could use some more depth on their OL but all in all look like a solid squad that will find depth to be their biggest issue. They had some success last season before falling in their CC game so they're hoping to have a decent showing in USA this season. With the right roster moves they may do alright but as things stand now it's going to be an uphill battle for them.
16 Vancouver Lions (10-6R)
Solid looking roster but their youth will hurt them this season. It's a 3 man operation and as of today the whole squad is inactive. Did well in their last league but weren't very dominating and will probably find this season to be a rough outing.
EASTERN
1 Black Ops 7 (14-2)
Very deep and deadly looking squad that could be a very strong push for a 1-2 seed this season. They're coming off a 14 win season and made it as far as the CC game before falling big to to the Blaze. Should be able to have a very strong showing this season.
2 All The King's Men (5-11WL)
A 5 win season forces ATKM back to the Pros this season but this squad looks prepped to move right back up. They lost 4 games by fewer than 10 points which could have easily turned the tables and had them sticking in WL so they are definitely a frontrunner in the East and anything less than a top 4, if not 1, finish will be a bit disappointing.
3 South Otto Fragile Porcelain Mice (14-2)
Another team that should be in the running for a top 4 seed. SOFPM is deep and built for promotion now. Can they get past Black Ops this season after falling to them twice last season though?
4 College Station Aggies (12-4)
The Aggies look like a tough draw for teams all around. Lot of talent on the squad and they should have their sights set on advancing farther than the 2nd round this season.
5 Nashville Hounds (10-6)
Looking at this roster it's hard to see a team that only had 10 wins last season. The squad looks deep and tough and in other Leagues might easily a top 2 finish. They were bounced out of the playoffs in the first round last season but this squad will be in the thick of it again this season.
6 Atlantic City Affliction (9-7)
ACA had some close losses last season that could have easily been wins and they'll have to find ways to bring home Ws in those games. The squad is deep and looks tough so they've got to be hoping to do better than a first round elimination last season.
7 Oakland Suppressors (9-7)
If Oakland is to take the next step forward they'll have to play top teams a lot better than they did last season. They have a deep enough squad so they just need to put all the pieces together to show some improvement.
8 Wala Wala Drunken Shriners (7-9)
Another tough looking squad that could have finished last season stronger if not for a few close losses. One thing is obvious after going through this league. On any given team there are a ton of teams that could come away with a win if the ball bounced their way. Wala just needs to see the ball bounce their way more this season to make it to the playoffs.
9 Punxsutawney Groundhogs (6-10)
Had a rough outing last season but the squad is deep enough to try and turn it around this season and make a push for a low playoff seed. That could be the best they can hope for this season with some tough teams rounding out the top of the conference.
10 The Outlaw Assassins (5-11)
After kicking off season 23 on a 4 game win streak the Assassins went on to drop their next 8 games. Not sure what kind of changes, if any, were made to this roster in the offseason but it's hard to see a huge turnaround from last season if nothing has changed.
11 Denver Giant 9'ers (11-5R)
Young team that will have some growing pains season. They had a solid season 23 and made it to their CC game before being eliminated but it's going to be tough for them to compete with top tier teams this season.
12 Las Vegas Gold Diggers (11-4-1R)
The squad is deep but their youth will hurt them this season. Should do well against some teams but might find it hard to reach .500 this season.
13 Gulf Coast Crocs (11-4-1R)
The Crocs need to stock up on depth or they may find themselves having issues on STs. Other than depth they look solid enough. They failed to advance past the first round of their playoffs last season and if they don't fill out a little more they may find the Pros a little tougher to handle. Could easily move up the rankings with some added depth.
14 Philadelphia SEXY Demonik (13-3R)
SEXY moves up after a strong 13 win season but the huge 72 point loss in the second round of the playoffs to a team they beat 27-12 in the regular season makes me question if they're ready for Pros quite yet.
15 Chicago Bears 85 (14-2R)
Da Bears are in the same situation as the Crocs. Sorely lacking depth. Chicago's problems are a little worse than depth and they need to fill out their OL and secondary if they want to compete this season. Right now it's a bleak outlook.
16 Minnesota Eagles (3-13)
Not very competitive last season and with the roster in the shape it's in that won't change much this season without some major retooling.
I'm not too familiar with most of the teams here except through name and reputation so if I'm way off than blame KoB for asking me to do this! I don't use any scripts since they stopped working for me so this is all just off the top of my head and probably way off for now but some of it will clear up as the real games get underway.
Tear them apart or award me with proclamations of love for the hard work but most of all enjoy and hopefully they get more entertaining as I learn the teams better.
PRESEASON RANKINGS (R = APL rookies this season, WL = i'm sure you can figure it out)
WESTERN
1 Monmouth Evil Monkeys (13-3)
Very deep and talented squad that had their way with most teams last season. Should continue that path this season as they try to take the next step. They made it as far as the CC game last season and will look to improve on that for season 24.
2 American Terrorists (13-3)
AT had a very good showing last season and will look to build on it this season. The roster is just hitting its peak in some areas so now is the time for them to make some noise. Should be in the thick of the playoff race and most likely looking at a top 4 seed.
3 South Georgia Growl (1-15WL)
Sent down to the Pros from WL, this squad is deep in comparison with some others. They should find a lot of easy pickings this season and will be in the playoff race throughout the season.
4 Tulsa Storm (11-5)
Another tough looking squad that could be in the running for a top 4 seed if they've improved at all this offseason. The squad looks deep and loaded with talent but can they hang with the ATs and MEMs enough to have a better playoff showing this season?
5 Covington Black Knights (7-9)
Deep squad that had a rough season 23. They had a few close losses last season that could have given them a winning record but they'll have to perform better this season if they want to make a run at a playoff spot.
6 Bay Area Bombers (10-6)
BAB is looking to have a better showing this season and with 2 narrow losses last season this could have been a 12-4 team. They were bounced out of the playoffs by MEM in the first round and will have to perform better against some of the stronger teams this season to make that happen.
7 Newfoundland Penguins (9-7)
Nothing strikes fear into opponents like a pack of rabid...penguins. Seriously though, the squad looks decent and they're coming off a 9 win season but they were trounced in the first round of the playoffs. Can they have a better showing this season?
8 Canton Bulldogs (8-8)
Finished last season at .500 and hoping for a better showing this season after ending the postseason in a rout at the hands of the Hedgehogs. Should be in the playoff hunt but seeing this team as a low seed right now.
9 American Predators (4-12)
The Preds are coming off a 4 win season and have to contend with bad chem to start things off. They suffered some big losses last season and it's hard for me to see things turning around this season. Nice mix of talent on the team but they'll need to play much better this season to hang with the tougher teams.
10 5th Masterminds (15-1R)
Another young but solid team. Coming off a 15 win season that saw their playoff run end in the CC game when they failed to stop the one team to beat them in the regular season. After fighting back in the 4th Q to take a 1 point lead they failed to stop their opponent and with 1 second left gave up a game winning FG that sent 5th home instead of to the LC game. The Masterminds show potential and might end up being one of the better new teams in the league this season if their age doesn't hurt them.
11 Stormwind City Gryphons (10-6R)
Solid squad with a good mix of older and younger dots. That should allow them to be competitive against lower ranked teams but how will they handle teams ranked in the top half of the conference?
12 Sin City Spoilers (15-1R)
Another young squad that will struggle this season against top tier teams. The schedule looks to start off easier before hitting a rough patch around midseason through to the end. Will that give them enough time to get a few more levels out of their dots and remain competitive in the second half of the season? They've got talent as they won their league last season through some intense close games but will that translate to wins up in the Pros.
13 Arkham Asylum Jokers (14-2R)
Young, talented squad that got as far as the CC game last season. Will have the usual growing pains due to age but they're deep enough to avoid relegation.
14 Wisconsin Rapids Red Raiders (13-3R)
Bad chem could hurt this squad early and they're also a little young in a few areas. They made it as far as the second round of their league playoffs last season but will find things tougher now that they're in USAPL. Don't see the playoffs in their future this season but could be building the beginnings of a good squad for next season.
15 North Texas Timberwolves (14-2R)
The Timberwolves could use some more depth on their OL but all in all look like a solid squad that will find depth to be their biggest issue. They had some success last season before falling in their CC game so they're hoping to have a decent showing in USA this season. With the right roster moves they may do alright but as things stand now it's going to be an uphill battle for them.
16 Vancouver Lions (10-6R)
Solid looking roster but their youth will hurt them this season. It's a 3 man operation and as of today the whole squad is inactive. Did well in their last league but weren't very dominating and will probably find this season to be a rough outing.
EASTERN
1 Black Ops 7 (14-2)
Very deep and deadly looking squad that could be a very strong push for a 1-2 seed this season. They're coming off a 14 win season and made it as far as the CC game before falling big to to the Blaze. Should be able to have a very strong showing this season.
2 All The King's Men (5-11WL)
A 5 win season forces ATKM back to the Pros this season but this squad looks prepped to move right back up. They lost 4 games by fewer than 10 points which could have easily turned the tables and had them sticking in WL so they are definitely a frontrunner in the East and anything less than a top 4, if not 1, finish will be a bit disappointing.
3 South Otto Fragile Porcelain Mice (14-2)
Another team that should be in the running for a top 4 seed. SOFPM is deep and built for promotion now. Can they get past Black Ops this season after falling to them twice last season though?
4 College Station Aggies (12-4)
The Aggies look like a tough draw for teams all around. Lot of talent on the squad and they should have their sights set on advancing farther than the 2nd round this season.
5 Nashville Hounds (10-6)
Looking at this roster it's hard to see a team that only had 10 wins last season. The squad looks deep and tough and in other Leagues might easily a top 2 finish. They were bounced out of the playoffs in the first round last season but this squad will be in the thick of it again this season.
6 Atlantic City Affliction (9-7)
ACA had some close losses last season that could have easily been wins and they'll have to find ways to bring home Ws in those games. The squad is deep and looks tough so they've got to be hoping to do better than a first round elimination last season.
7 Oakland Suppressors (9-7)
If Oakland is to take the next step forward they'll have to play top teams a lot better than they did last season. They have a deep enough squad so they just need to put all the pieces together to show some improvement.
8 Wala Wala Drunken Shriners (7-9)
Another tough looking squad that could have finished last season stronger if not for a few close losses. One thing is obvious after going through this league. On any given team there are a ton of teams that could come away with a win if the ball bounced their way. Wala just needs to see the ball bounce their way more this season to make it to the playoffs.
9 Punxsutawney Groundhogs (6-10)
Had a rough outing last season but the squad is deep enough to try and turn it around this season and make a push for a low playoff seed. That could be the best they can hope for this season with some tough teams rounding out the top of the conference.
10 The Outlaw Assassins (5-11)
After kicking off season 23 on a 4 game win streak the Assassins went on to drop their next 8 games. Not sure what kind of changes, if any, were made to this roster in the offseason but it's hard to see a huge turnaround from last season if nothing has changed.
11 Denver Giant 9'ers (11-5R)
Young team that will have some growing pains season. They had a solid season 23 and made it to their CC game before being eliminated but it's going to be tough for them to compete with top tier teams this season.
12 Las Vegas Gold Diggers (11-4-1R)
The squad is deep but their youth will hurt them this season. Should do well against some teams but might find it hard to reach .500 this season.
13 Gulf Coast Crocs (11-4-1R)
The Crocs need to stock up on depth or they may find themselves having issues on STs. Other than depth they look solid enough. They failed to advance past the first round of their playoffs last season and if they don't fill out a little more they may find the Pros a little tougher to handle. Could easily move up the rankings with some added depth.
14 Philadelphia SEXY Demonik (13-3R)
SEXY moves up after a strong 13 win season but the huge 72 point loss in the second round of the playoffs to a team they beat 27-12 in the regular season makes me question if they're ready for Pros quite yet.
15 Chicago Bears 85 (14-2R)
Da Bears are in the same situation as the Crocs. Sorely lacking depth. Chicago's problems are a little worse than depth and they need to fill out their OL and secondary if they want to compete this season. Right now it's a bleak outlook.
16 Minnesota Eagles (3-13)
Not very competitive last season and with the roster in the shape it's in that won't change much this season without some major retooling.
