No worries, I didn't think you were flamin.
The cap level you want depends upon the archetype of the player. Some attributes need to be taken higher because of how high the other players on the field are in respect to that same attribute. For an OLB speed needs to be taken to 77, or 81 because there are loads of speedy players on the field that he needs to be able to compete with, ie RB's, WR's, etc. By comparison a MLB needs more strength first because he is going to be plugging the gaps and taking down inside rushers who are stronger, but it only needs to be taken to 68 because the offensive players he is battling aren't putting points into strength first like he is. Think of it this way; you want to fight fire with fire, speed with speed, strength with strength.
Use the archetype to guide your first attribute. A Blitzer needs speed, a Hard Hitter needs strength, a pass coverage LB needs vision and speed and jumping. The archetype is going to determine the order in which the build is done and the level to which you it. Usually the first attribute is taken up to 68 or 73 for everything but Speed because the Auto Level Gains will take it higher on its own at a rate that keeps up with the offense. Speed is taken to 77 or 81 because the offensive guys have comparatively fewer major attributes and can take it that high very fast, so defensive players who rely on speed need to keep up.
I may be rambling, so if you have any other questions or need clarification, just let me know.