Warrior General Games

Well week 15 is here and that means we are closer than we have ever been to the playoffs!
Congrats on making it to week 15!
Only 2 games left and teams are giving hell to win these final playoff spots!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tqW9YoL401I

That’s right, give’em hell!
This week we send out a few invites to the playoffs and we usher in a new team to the Hot Chick Lounge.
It all happens here in Issue 15 of the Sport’s Page!


Playoffs or Bust!!
Well all the invites have been sent out to the Alpha teams that will be attending the playoffs.
Congrats to all 8 of you that made it.
Zeta, on the other hand, still has teams fighting to the end for their invitations.
Let’s check it out.
(in no particular order)

Alpha:
1) Short Bus Allstars
2) Sofia Spiders
3) Minsk Ninjas
4) Arkadak Arsenal
5) Tyrrhenian Sea Wasps
6) Old School
7) Buda Pests
8) Sarajevo Black Hand

Zeta:
1) Stewart Ballers
2) Stryden Blitzkrieg Balls
3) C-Town Hoodlums
4) Vilnius Velociraptors
5) ?
6) ?
7) ?
8) ?


• Hot Chick Lounge Expands……….again.
Well, this week it is the Ukraine Freight Train that goes into the only place you can send a team that losses nine games in a season.
To the Hot Chick Lounge!
And you knows da’ rulz! Nine wins is automatic membership.
So good luck next season, Freight Train’ers and as always……………….
…………..thanks for playing.


***SA’s Player of the Week***
This week’s POW goes to Arkadak Arsenal CB, John Maynard Keynes II.
He snagged a game saving INT and ran it back for the game winning TD in a huge GOW win over the Minsk Ninjas!
Now that was clutch!
So here’s to you, John Maynard Keynes II………………..
http://i378.photobucket.com/albums/oo227/jason41470/GuinnessBeer.jpg
SALUTE!!


Will your team make the playoffs like a breath of fresh air?
Or will they create a stink like a bad beer fart?
This is no time for stupid ass questions, the playoffs are almost here! So just read the Sport’s Page to find out, chuckleheads!!!


Have a coke and a smile and……………..

………………….LET’S DO THIS SHIT!!!


You may or may not agree with them, but this is how I see them.

****ALPHA CONFERENCE POWER RANKINGS****

LW = Last Week ranking
* = Play Off spot clinched


*#1 Short Bus Allstars (14-0) LW1 - Oh good lord, can we just skip the slaughter and fast forward to where you guys are presented with the W?
You guys are making this season SO boring……………but I’ll still take a trophy. 
Next opponent: #11 Ukraine Freight Train (5-9)

*#2 Sofia Spiders (12-2) LW2 - Want to deliver a knockout blow?
Well here you go!
Take your best shot in the GOW.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0FsatlyzUeA
Next opponent: at #10 Stirling Four Horsemen (6-8)

*#3 Arkadak Arsenal (11-3) LW4 – This one will be like the 1976 Pittsburgh Steelers playing the Jenna Jameson School for Porn Sluts. It’s fun to play them, but it always ends up with a mess to clean up.
Next opponent: #13 Alexandrovsk Conquerors (3-11)

*#4 Minsk Ninjas (10-4) LW3 - Two free W’s to end your regular season.
You guys must have slept with the right schedule maker this season.
If a certain Arsenal team should lose one, you guys could be #3.
Next opponent: at #9 Ares Assassins (7-7)

*#5 Tyrrhenian Sea Wasps (10-4) LW5 - This will be like the Saints playing the George W. Bush Junior High School for Mental Idiots varsity squad.
Next opponent: #14 Vladivostok Voodoo (3-11)

*#6 Old School (10-4) LW6 - Oh jeez! Do I really need to say something here?
It’s Saratov for Pete’s sake!
Enjoy the W.
Next opponent: at #16 Saratov Catrades (0-14)

*#7 Buda Pests (9-5) LW7 - I think you guys are banging the same schedule maker that the Ninjas are banging.
TimberWolves and Four Horsemen is a nice way to close up the regular season.
Next opponent: at #15 Hollywood TimberWolves (1-13)

*#8 Sarajevo Black Hand (8-6) LW8 - Well you asre in by the hairs of your chinny, chin, chin.
Win, lose, it doesn’t matter. YOU MADE IT!
Next opponent: at #12 Munich ManiAx (4-10)

#9 Ares Assassins (7-7) LW9 - I could probably say anything here and no one would notice.
Poop.
Poopie.
Poop mouth. The Ares Poopsassins.
Zibba, zabba, zooby, let’s see a Hot Chick boobie!
See.
Next opponent: #4 Minsk Ninjas (10-4)

#10 Stirling Four Horsemen (6-8) LW10 - One knock out blow, coming up!
GOW style.
Next opponent: #2 Sofia Spiders (12-2)

#11 Ukraine Freight Train (5-9) LW11 - Well Freight Train’ers, you guys fought it off long and hard, but in the end is where you got it. Nine losses is an automatic invite to the Lounge.
Actually, the girls in the Hot Chick Lounge were very excited that we were going to have a train this week. They are so naughty.
Thanks for playing.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/04Agustina/Agustina-04.jpg
Next opponent: at #1 Short Bus Allstars (14-0)

#12 Munich ManiAx (4-10) LW12 -
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/03Nikki/Nikki-01.jpg
Next opponent: #8 Sarajevo Black Hand (8-6)

#13 Alexandrovsk Conquerors (3-11) LW13 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/12Stacie/Stacie-01.jpg
Next opponent: at #3 Arkadak Arsenal (11-3)

#14 Vladivostok Voodoo (3-11) LW14 – Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/01Amy/Amy-03.jpg
Next opponent: at #5 Tyrrhenian Sea Wasps (10-4)

#15 Hollywood TimberWolves (1-13) LW15 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/02Athena/Athena-12.jpg
Next opponent: #7 Buda Pests (9-5)

#16 Saratov Catrades (0-14) LW16 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/10Seanna/Seanna-11.jpg
Next opponent: #6 Old School (10-4)


*****WEEK 15 ALPHA CONFERENCE PREDICTIONS*****

So I’ll keep track of my predictions week by week just to see if I am any dam good. In the Game of the Week's (GOW) I'll go up against my old pal, the On Line Magic 8 Ball http://av.vet.ksu.edu/flash/8ball/
Yes, I really do consult an On Line Magic 8 Ball.

Here's my prediction record week by week.

Week 1: 5-3 Week 2: 5-3 Week 3: 6-2 Week 4: 5-3 Week 5: 5-3 Week 6: 7-1 Week 7: 7-1 Week 8: 6-2 Week 9: 7-1 Week 10: 6-2 Week 11: 8-0 Week 14: 7-1

Overall: 74-22
SA’s GOW: 7-5
Magic 8 Ball’s GOW: 5-7

#4 Minsk Ninjas (10-4) at #9 Ares Assassins (7-7) = Minsk Ninjas
Game Rating: 1/6 beers

#2 Sofia Spiders (12-2) at #10 Stirling Four Horsemen (6-8) = Sofia Spiders
Game Rating: 3/6 beers

#11 Ukraine Freight Train (5-9) at #1 Short Bus Allstars (14-0) = Short Bus Allstars
Game Rating: 2/6 beers

#8 Sarajevo Black Hand (8-6) at #12 Munich ManiAx (4-10) = Sarajevo Black Hand
Game Rating: 3/6 beers

#13 Alexandrovsk Conquerors (3-11) at #3 Arkadak Arsenal (11-3) = Arkadak Arsenal
Game Rating: 2/6 beers

#14 Vladivostok Voodoo (3-11) at #5 Tyrrhenian Sea Wasps (10-4) = Tyrrhenian Sea Wasps
Game Rating: 2/6 beers

#7 Buda Pests (9-5) at #15 Hollywood TimberWolves (1-13) = Buda Pests
Game Rating: 1/6 beers

#6 Old School (10-4) at #16 Saratov Catrades (0-14) = Old School
Game Rating: 1/6 beers


*Game Of The Week* (GOW)
#2 Sofia Spiders (12-2) at #10 Stirling Four Horsemen (6-8) –
Ok, they can’t ALL be winners.
But this was the best match up I could scrape together at the last minute.
Sooooo………………
SPIDERS!
FOUR HORSEMEN!
Both taste great when barbequed!
The Spiders are looking to continue their dominance!
The Four Horsemen are looking to let the Spiders continue their dominance!
Sometimes it just doesn’t pay to get up in the morning.
But let’s make this one a Prison Shower Gauntlet Match!
The first team to enter the prison showers filled with 75 raging bull queen inmates without getting caught, thrown down, beaten and forced into male on male acts of sexual deviance and make it out the exit on the other side, wins!
Sound good?
I thought so.
Remember guys, it’s just a game. So just have fun in the Prison Shower Gauntlet Match.
Let’s go Bort! It’s getting late, so sim this bitch already!
Magic 8 Ball says: http://av.vet.ksu.edu/flash/8ball
Question: Will the Spiders beat the Four Horsemen?
8 Ball's answer: Don’t count on it.
SA's Pick: Sofia Spiders
Magic 8 Ball Pick: Stirling Four Horsemen

18/48 beers! – Let’s face it.
The schedule makers really screwed us on this one, so just head over to the Zeta sided of Thunder Dome ands watch those match ups.
You will need to pay the extra price of admission though.

Let’s do this shit!!


Good luck to all the teams in the Alpha!

____________________________________________________________________________


****ZETA CONFERENCE POWER RANKINGS****

LW = Last Week Ranking
* = Play Off spot clinched


*#1 Stewart Ballers (14-0) LW1 - The only way to not be #1, is to lose. Chernobyl and C-Town will give it their all to shove those Ballers down your throats.
My advice:
Don’t fuck it up.
Next opponent: #5 Chernobyl Aftermath (9-5)

*#2 Stryden Blitzkrieg Balls (13-1) LW2 - It’s time for some late season hijinks in the GOW!
Next opponent: at #4 Vilnius Velociraptors (10-4)

*#3 C-Town Hoodlums (13-1) LW3 - Odessa will give you win #14 and you are guaranteed a spot no lower than #3.
A win over the Ballers might move you up one. I guess there is only one way to find out.
Next opponent: at #14 Odessa Mojo (2-12)

*#4 Vilnius Velociraptors (10-4) LW4 - Wake up Vilnius!
It’s GOW time!
Next opponent: #2 Stryden Blitzkrieg Balls (13-1)

#5 Chernobyl Aftermath (9-5) LW6 -
Situation Report:
It’s still not over for you guys.
You need to win 1 game to be a lock for the post season. Stewart and Belgrade are the two teams left to play, so it won’t be easy.
But if making the post season was really easy they would have named it after my ex………………..that slut.
Next opponent: at #1 Stewart Ballers (14-0)

#6 Portland Niners (8-6) LW5 - A win here gives you a playoff spot.
A loss means your idiots for letting a golden opportunity slip through your Nine fingers.
Don’t be the idiot.
Situation Report:
Portland must win 1 game.
- Buffalo and Belgrade must lose 1 game.
Next opponent: #7 Nolaha K&B Purple Spider Pigs (8-6)

#7 Nolaha K&B Purple Spider Pigs (8-6) LW7 - This game is HUGE!
Win and you’re in!
Lose and you just suck. That’s just how EE Pro rolls, baby.
Situation Report:
Nolaha must win 1 game.
- Buffalo and Belgrade must lose 1 game.
Next opponent: at #6 Portland Niners (8-6)

#8 Belgrade Blaze (7-7) LW11 - You guys are in the driver seat right now, plus it was a really good thing getting that W over Buffalo.
Situation Report:
Must win both games or things will get really fucking complicated.
- Buffalo, Jeff City and Rome must all lose at least 1 game.
Next opponent: #15 Bucharest Warriors (2-12)

#9 Buffalo WarZone (7-7) LW8 - You guys have a great chance at the playoffs as long as Belgrade drops 1. Good luck.
Situation Report:
Buffalo must win both games. Cape Town and Bucharest are sure fire W’s, so congrats.
- Belgrade must lose 1 game. If not, they hold the W over you.
- Jeff City and Rome should lose 1 game just to make you feel safe.
Next opponent: #16 The Cape Town Cubicles (0-14)

#10 Jefferson City Bucks (6-8) LW9 - There is still a slight glimmer of hope, but you guys will need some big time help.
Situation Report:
Jeff City must win both games. Hellas = W, Portland = ?. Plus:
- Rome must lose at least 1 game.
- Belgrade and Buffalo must lose both games.
You do have wins over Belgrade and Rome, so that might help.
Next opponent: at #13 Hellas Hoplites (3-11)

#11 Rome Raiders (6-8) LW10 - Well Rome, you guys really screwed yourselves this time.
Situation Report:
Rome must win both games plus:
- Belgrade must lose 1 game. Bucharest and Chernobyl left on their schedule, it could happen.
- Buffalo must lose 1 game. Cape Town and Bucharest left to play, 2 wins for Buffalo so not gonna’ happen.
- Jeff City must lose 1 game. You have a W over the Bucks already.
So that is what you need to be in.
Next opponent: #12 Russian Revolution (3-11)

#12 Russian Revolution (3-11) LW13 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/06Teresa/Teresa-02.jpg
Next opponent: at #11 Rome Raiders (6-8)

#13 Hellas Hoplites (3-11) LW12 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/09Morgan/Morgan-02.jpg
Next opponent: #10 Jefferson City Bucks (6-8)

#14 Odessa Mojo (2-12) LW15 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/11Jamie/Jamie-12.jpg
Next opponent: #3 C-Town Hoodlums (13-1)

#15 Bucharest Warriors (2-12) LW14 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/04Teresa/Teresa-01.jpg
Next opponent: at #8 Belgrade Blaze (7-7)

#16 The Cape Town Cubicles (0-14) LW16 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/02Taya/Taya-03.jpg
Next opponent: at #9 Buffalo WarZone (7-7)


*****WEEK 15 ZETA CONFERENCE PREDICTIONS*****

Here's my prediction record week by week.

Week 1: 5-3 Week 2: 7-1 Week 3: 7-1 Week 4: 6-2 Week 5: 7-1 Week 6: 6-2 Week 7: 7-1 week 8: 6-2 Week 9: 7-1 Week 10: 6-2 Week 11: 5-3 Week 14: 7-1

Overall: 76-20
SA’s GOW: 9-3
Magic 8 Ball’s GOW: 6-6

#2 Stryden Blitzkrieg Balls (13-1) at #4 Vilnius Velociraptors (10-4) = Stryden Blitzkrieg Balls
Game Rating: 6/6 beers

#5 Chernobyl Aftermath (9-5) at #1 Stewart Ballers (14-0) = Stewart Ballers
Game Rating: 5/6 beers

#7 Nolaha K&B Purple Spider Pigs (8-6) at #6 Portland Niners (8-6) = Portland Niners
Game Rating: 5/6 beers

#12 Russian Revolution (3-11) at #11 Rome Raiders (6-8) = Rome Raiders
Game Rating: 2/6 beers

#10 Jefferson City Bucks (6-8) #13 Hellas Hoplites (3-11) = Jefferson City Bucks
Game Rating: 2/6 beers

#15 Bucharest Warriors (2-12) at #8 Belgrade Blaze (7-7) = Belgrade Blaze
Game Rating: 2/6 beers

#3 C-Town Hoodlums (13-1) at #14 Odessa Mojo (2-12) = C-Town Hoodlums
Game Rating: 2/6 beers

#16 The Cape Town Cubicles (0-14) at #9 Buffalo WarZone (7-7) = Buffalo WarZone
Game Rating: 1/6 beers


*Game Of The Week* (GOW)
#2 Stryden Blitzkrieg Balls (13-1) at #4 Vilnius Velociraptors (10-4) –
Stryden vs Vilnikius in the Zeta GOW!!
Two top 4 teams will battle it out tonight in Thunder Dome!
Stryden Blitzkrieg Balls, successfully blitzing balls since 1923!
Vilnius Velociraptors, tastes better than chicken!
If Stryden wants to stay #2, they need a win right here!
If Vilnius wants to remain top 4, they need a win right now!
Nowhere in the history of mankind will you find a more heated, a more deadly, a more savage rivalry than that between a living, breathing dinosaur and a group of ball blitzing guys!
No gimmicks!
No rules!
No special matches!
Just two teams looking to get it on!
Yo Bort! Quit being fashionably late and get to sim’ing this bitch!
Magic 8 Ball says: http://av.vet.ksu.edu/flash/8ball
Question: Will the Blitzkrieg Balls beat the Velociraptors?
8 Ball's answer: My reply is no.
SA's Pick: Stryden Blitzkrieg Balls
Magic 8 Ball Pick: Vilnius Velociraptors

25/48 beers! – I think I just crapped my pants!
25 beers and three most exciting match ups in the history of season 14!
First, there is the match between the Spider Pigs and the Niners! If you want in, you have to win!
Second, we have the Ballers and the Aftermath match up! Ballers are in, but the Aftermath need the win!
And then there is the GOW. #2 Sryden squares off against the #4 Vilnius! It’s a late season Top 4 War and there isn’t a dam thing anyone can do to stop this shit!
* WARNING * you may need to make an early morning beer run or two.

Let’s do this shit!!


Good luck to all the teams in Zeta!

fucking awesome imo

Nice work as always!

great work, you were missed

Originally posted by Smiling Assasain


#5 Chernobyl Aftermath (9-5) LW6 -
Situation Report:
It’s still not over for you guys.
You need to win 1 game to be a lock for the post season. Stewart and Belgrade are the two teams left to play, so it won’t be easy.
But if making the post season was really easy they would have named it after my ex………………..that slut.
Next opponent: at #1 Stewart Ballers (14-0)




Now thats hilarious. Props on another great read!

i think buda might be a little too high on this list..

The Pigs are about to shit on everybody

Originally posted by robjay08
The Pigs are about to shit on everybody

Actions speak louder

Pigs by 30, write that down.

Originally posted by Border Runners
Pigs by 30, write that down.

It's written

Good work, as usual. Though, Arkadak is either the #2 or #3 seed. Unless we lose to Conquerors, it's mathematically impossible for us to be anything other than #2 or #3 seed.

If we beat Sofia, we're #2. If we lose, we're #3. All the teams we could tie with, we hold the first tie-breaker.

Originally posted by JTsNiners
It's written

Did u write it in pencil so we can erase it after...LOL

http://goallineblitz.com/game/game.pl?game_id=1019413

I was a little short. Erase and make that 38 please.

Like I said

Pigs are shitting all over the place, cant wait for the playoffs

Originally posted by Border Runners
http://goallineblitz.com/game/game.pl?game_id=1019413

I was a little short. Erase and make that 38 please.

wow you guys are really going for the ultimate douche bag award, congrats