FAT DADDY CA$H’S CORNER: WEEK 10
The Corner has been long overdue this season thanks to the damn suits that run Hollywood who have kept this intrepid reporter busy with deadlines and meetings. Rat bastids!!!!
But now the Corner is back and will be releasing my first Power Rankings of the season as well as an MVP race update and my Mid Season Pro Bowl teams.
You’ve all waited long enough … so let’s get to it!
Power Rankings: Week 10:
Alpha Conference:
1. Graz Grizzlies (10-0):
In just their second year in WEPL, the Grizzlies have flown out to an impressive 10-0 start behind the arm of QB Matt Man and the legs of WR Woody Wayne. The two have hooked up for 5 of Man’s 15 TDs this season making Wayne the Grizzlie’s primary scoring threat. But WR Pedal TotheMetal can’t be overlooked as the possession receiver has nabbed 50 balls for close to 400 yards in just 10 games. The defense has been impressive too as the LB trio of Bob Carter, Paddy Willis and Bjorn Staelens have combined for 136 tackles, 31 PDs, 2 INTs and 2 FFs. Impressive wins over Paris, Belfast, Bonn and Paris have paved the way for a an easier finish in which the Grizzlies will only face 3 teams in the Top 8 over their final 6 games.
2. Paris Dream Bolts (8-2):
Paris came up a point short against the Grizzlies in Week 10, putting them firmly in the passenger’s seat in Alpha. But with the League’s 4th ranked offense and defense, the Dream Bolts can’t be overlooked. Led by HB TJ Crimson’s WEPL leading 27 TDs, the Bolts have been able to cover up for a lack of a solid passing game and keep their defense fresh. With a final 6 games that includes 2 against gutted teams, the Bolts are in great shape to steal a 2nd or even a 1st seed should the Grizzlies stumble.
3. Woodridge Lumberjacks (8-2):
The defending Alpha champs have experienced and up and down season thus far. The shine on Wujax’s impressive wins over Cardiff, Belfast, Aberdeen and Toulouse (prior to them being gutted) have been dulled slightly by losses to Bonn and the Dream Bolts. A tough final 6 games pits the Wujax against the Mercs, Phillies, Grizzlies, Black Watch, Thunder and Monarchs. That final stretch will really prove whether or not the Lumberjacks have the chops to defend their crown. The burden will fall upon QB Mario Stanfield to build upon his great season thus far (15 TDs to just 3 INTs) if the Lumberjacks hope to get through that stretch at 4-2 or better.
4. Bonn Dynamo (7-3):
Led by one of WEPL’s most dynamic backfield duos, the Dynamo have sprinted out to an impressive 7-3 start in their debut season. Multi talented HB Sven Shiner has been brilliant catching passes out of the backfield with his team high 44 receptions. His backfield mate Juaquan-Juan Tomba has piled up the yards on the ground while reaching pay dirt 19 times. However a recent 2 game skid, including a surprising 23-20 loss to the slumping Black Watch, have created some doubt around the Dynamo’s ability to win once the playoffs start and is the reason why they are ranked one spot below the Wujax whom they defeated in 5 this season. A relatively soft closing schedule should allow the Dynamo to get to 11 or 12 wins with ease – the question though is what happens next?
5. Paris Philharmonic (6-4):
After a scary 1-4 start, the Philharmonics have bounced back to win their last 5 games in a row, including big wins over Aberdeen and Belfast which may prove to be vital tie breakers later on in the season. Close loses to Graz (3 points) and Dream Bolts (5 points) prove that this team can hang with the upper echelon of the Conference. If they are going to make any noise in the playoffs they will need to get more from their 29th ranked offense. Despite QB Steve Tarkenton’s great stats (24 TDs and 0 INTs), Paris has been unable to find a running game which has stalled drives and put their defense in some untenable situations. With weapons like WR Reggie 3 Forever (52 catches, 7 TDs) and Joe Chang (54 catches, 12 TDs), the Philharmonic have the talent to surprise some people come playoff time.
6. Belfast Commandos (6-4):
Defense gives Belfast the edge over the other two remaining 6-4 clubs. With the League’s 7th ranked defensive unit, the Commandos have been in every game they’ve played but for their Week 2 blowout loss to the Grizzlies. Led by LB Horace Horsecollar’s 54 tackles and 2 INTs, the Commandos have the ability to keep opponents out of the end zone. The problem has been Belfast’s own inability to maintain a constant offensive attack. Despite QB Tone Romo’s 21 TDs so far this year, the rushing game has been virtually non-existent, cashing a mere 6 times so far this season. With three brutal games left against Bonn, the Dream Bolts and Mercs, Belfast will need to find a way to squeeze more offense out of their roster so that their defense doesn’t need to shoulder so much of the burden.
7. E-City Mercenaries (6-4):
HB Duncan Idaho’s 1,162 yards and 17 TDs leads the way for WEPL’s 16th ranked rushing attack. On the other side of the ball, SS Oliver Tuck’s 61 tackles, 29 PDs, 3 INTs and 2 FF puts him on the short list for Defensive Player of the Year honors. Tucks play combined with the Merc’s grind-it-out style of play has vaulted E-City’s D to 17th overall in the League. Still, the secondary has been torched, as teams have routinely passed for over 300 yards. With a brutal finish to their season, including games against the Grizzlies, Aberdeen and Belfast, the Mercs will have to shore up their D in order to secure a playoff bid. If they don’t, they could slip behind Black Watch or Lyon in the tiebreaker category.
8. Aberdeen Wrecking Crew (6-4):
A 3-0 start was doused by back to back loses to Woodridge and Belfast – however no loss was more crippling than AWC’s Week 10 loss to the slumping Monarchs. For the past several seasons much has been expected from Aberdeen’s star-studded roster. With two time WEPL Player of the Year Jimmy Johnston anchoring their defense, it’s hard to fathom that this club has failed to make the playoffs for 3 straight seasons. Their 6-4 start gives the Aberdeen faithful some hope – however their atrocious pass defense (ranked last in the league) has allowed teams to find the end zone often; even with Johnston racking up 26 sacks thus far this year. The offense hasn’t faired much better as QB Laser Rocketarm has been pedestrian and HB Tank Smasher has a YPC of only 3.8 despite 11 TDs. With 4 of their remaining 6 games coming against Top 8 teams, Aberdeen will have to go at least 3-3 to secure their first playoff birth in over 3 seasons. I’m not sure they have what it takes to get it done.
9. Black Watch (5-5):
The hangover continues for Black Watch. After a disappointing Season 7, the Watch have not rebounded as well as many expected. An 2-5 start seemed to sink the Black Watch as they looked lost on both sides of the ball. QB Jack Winters has been sacked 16 times while only finding the end zone 10. Their three headed rushing attack has put up great numbers between the 20s – but once in the red zone the touchdowns have been hard to find. On defense, the once proud unit was pushed around by middle of the pack clubs like Aberdeen and Turin. However, a fresh 3 game winning streak, capped off by a huge 23-20 upset of Bonn last week, has the Black Watch fans feeling the excitement once again. K Austin Moore’s last second 48 yard FG gave Black Watch the win and a new hope for a playoff birth. But it won’t be easy. With the Dream Bolts, Mercs, Grizzlies and Lumberjacks left, Black Watch is going to need beat at least 2 if not 3 of those teams to catch one of the 6-4 teams.
10. West Wales Warriors (4-6):
Despite losing 4 games in a row (all to Top 8 clubs) and losing to the Sharks earlier in the season – the Warriors grab the 10th spot in the rankings ahead of Lyon on the strength of their play. In all four of their recent loses (to Bonn, Dream Bolts, Woodridge and E-City), Wales has kept it close and even had a shot to steal two of those games. Led by HB Dennis Riddle’s 17 TDs and QB Johnny Oscar’s gun-slinging mentality (16 TDs to 10 INTs), the Warriors can put up points on anyone. It’s just their defense that has let them down. Ranked 28th overall in the League, the D has been just as bad at stopping the run as they are the pass. If they can’t find a playmaker to step up and help elevate the D, it’s going to fall upon the offense’s shoulders to keep piling up the points. This should make for an entertaining finish as they face the playoff hungry Black Watch, AWC and Belfast over the next 5 games. While the playoffs look like a long shot for these Warriors, an upset or two might not be so far fetched.
11. Lyon Sharks (4-6):
For the Sharks, their first season in WEPL has been a frustrating one. After a surprising 2-1 start, including a win over the Mercs, the Sharks thought it was going to be smooth sailing. However, after losing 5 of their next 7 games, things are looking mighty bleak in Lyon. Desperate to shake things up, starting QB, and WEPL vet. Philipp Pohl has been traded signaling perhaps the beginning of a move towards Lyon folding up their tents. With only a CPU QB behind Pohl, the offense will struggle to replace Pohls 2,331 yards and 16 TDs to date. Factor in tough remaining games against the Phillies, Dynamo and Dream Bolts and 5-11 is not just a possibility, but likely.
12. Turin THUNDER (3-7):
Turin gets the nod over the Monarchs here based purely on instinct on my part. Both Turin and the Monarchs have only one quality win each – each against a different opponent. However, the Monarchs are WEPL Royalty and even when they are bad they are expected to be better than WEPL rookies like the Thunder. Thus, I have to give Turin their due. Thanks to WEPL veteran HB Ankle Breaka’s 19 TDs and 849 yards rushing, the Thunder have been able to control the clock and put points on the board. Sadly, their own defense has been unable to stop anyone else from scoring. A favorable schedule down the stretch gives fans hopes that the Thunder can get to 6 wins or better before the year is out – however a playoff bid is about as likely as me finding time to do the Corner every week.
13. London Monarchs (3-7):
After losing 7 of their first 8 games, the Monarchs found their mojo thanks to a 255-0 thrashing of a helpless CPU team. Still, the hangover from that lopsided win not only affected the Monarch’s stat page, it seemed to kick start their energy level as they followed that up with an impressive 21-17 point win over The Wrecking Crew. At 3-7 it would take a miracle run for the Monarchs to turn around their season and make the playoffs, but it’s not entirely impossible. The toughest game left on their schedule is against Woodridge and it comes the last week of the season. The rest of their games, while difficult, are winnable. If the Monarchs can get on a roll, their momentum might make it interesting down the stretch.
14. Team Perkis (1-9):
Not much to say here. Perkis has been the whipping boy for everyone in Alpha this season but they got their chance to dole out some punishment of their own in Week 10 as they blasted the gutted Aviators 255-0. The only thing keeping Perkis in WEPL is the fact that both Dinas and Toulouse were gutted. It’s time to start planning for Season 9 for Perkis. If they can’t bring in some playmakers or coaches to turn things around, they could find themselves back in AAA by Season 10.
15. Dinas Red Bandits (1-9):
It’s ugly right now in Dinas as they continue to rebuild. With 6 games left it will only get uglier. It’s sad to see such a fun franchise in the gutter right now. Here’s hoping for a quick rebound.
16. Toulouse Aviators (1-9):
Toulouse, we hardly knew ya!
Zeta:
1. Stockholm Meatballs (10-0):
Not content to rest on their laurels after their unexpected WEPL title run last season, the Meatballs have been quietly adding talent to their roster throughout the off season and regular season. New additions such as WR Montgomery Brogan (49 catches, 625 yards and 7 TDs), NT Arthur Riot (27 tackles), DE Hawk Davis (2 Sacks), LB Shaun Nickerson (28 Tackles, 8 PDs) and Defensive Player of the Year candidate SS C.J. DeCoud (51 Tackles, 4 PDs) have bolstered an already talented roster. Factor in the recent signing of HB Iam Legend who will join WELP’s leading MVP candidate HB Mal Brown (1,917 yards and 23 TDs) and the Meatballs are poised to make a serious run at a second straight Zeta title. With WEPL’s number 1 ranked defense and 9th ranked offense, the Meatballs have sprinted out to a 10-0 start. A huge Week 13 showdown with the undefeated Black Forest Mercenaries will not only be entertaining, but should go a long ways towards figuring out who the team to beat in WEPL is.
2. Black Forest Mercenaries (10-0):
Despite being 10-0, the Mercs get slotted behind Stockholm thanks in large part to their strength of schedule. The Mercs have rolled through their schedule thus far, but with games left against GRD, Korb and Stockholm, the Mercenaries haven’t faced as many of the top 5 teams as the Meatballs have. Led by HB Millhouse McKenzie’s 1,127 Yards and 15 TDs, the Mercs run a ball control offense and bank on their brilliant defense led by CBs Dalton Jay (42 Tackles, 51 PDs, 2 INTs) and Killswitch Engage (19 Tackles, 8 Sacks, 13 Hurries, 5 PDs). The results have been a number of close wins (4 wins by 7 or less this year) that should help strengthen their intestinal fortitude come playoff time. With their brutal finishing schedule, the Mercs will have every opportunity to prove they belong at Number 1 on these rankings. Either way, anything less than a deep playoff run will constitute a major disappointment for these Mercenaries.
3. Korb Destroyers (8-2):
A flurry of trades over the past few days has crippled the Destroyers chemistry but should serve them well in the long run. The front office has been busy, bringing in DT Brickwall Scorsone, DE Xenon Blue and WR Henriques the Englishmen while bidding goodbye to TE Hans Silberbach, WR Shawn Wellington, G Jim Rokame and CB Arno Wellington. The new additions didn’t pay off in their Week 10 match up with Stockholm in which they fell 26-9, but with games against Sevilla and PPP sandwiched between match ups with GRD, the Pimps, Annihilators and BFM, there should be enough time for the new guys to gel with the rest of the roster. 10 wins is a certainty for this club, and there’s a good chance they can get 13 or more; making this a very dangerous team come playoff time.
4. Grass Root Divots (8-2):
The Divots shook off a two game losing streak by beating up on the hapless Naranjas 59-13 in Week 10. The win stops the bleeding and gets the team refocused just in time for their key match up with the Pimps and Destroyers over the next two weeks. Led by a low risk, high completion, two headed passing attack (QBs Payton Tarkenton and Rommel Irons have combined for over 3,223 yards, 16 TDs and just 6 INTs), the Divots have been able to put up points in bunches this year. The defense hasn’t been bad either as LB Shade Tree (52 Tackles, 2 Hurries, 3 PDs, 3 INTs, 1 FF) and SS Tex Willer (51 Tackles, 30 PDs, 1 INT, 1 FF) are both in the running for Defensive Player of the Year honors. The Divots closing schedule is by no means easy and they will be tested by not only the Pimps and Destroyers but Annihilators, Mercenaries and Black Knights as well. A 4-2 finish should be enough to guarantee a Top 4 seed and could very well be likely.
5. Rivals Mainboard Pimps (7-3):
The Pimps have been snake bit this year. An OT loss to Stockholm and close loss to rival Antwerp shows that the Pimps are indeed back and capable of playing with, and beating, anyone. Still, the Pimps inability to win those close games – something that has haunted them in the past – looms large as they close out Season 8. While the Pimps have been traditionally known for their high flying offense, this season it’s been their defense that has led the way. DE Greg Kelly (4 Sacks, 3 Hurries, 2 FF), LB Big Baby Jesus (50 Tackles, 5 Hurries, 5 PDs, 1 FF) and CB Durn da Return (29 Tackles, 21 PD, 2 INTs) have taken the reigns of the defense and led them 8th overall in the WEPL. With HBs MB III and Mike Imoh combining for 17 TDs so far this season, the Pimps have the ability to grind out the clock and rely on their defense to close the door on their opponents. A tough closing schedule includes match ups with GRD, Berlin, Korb, Dallas and the Hitmen.
6. Antwerp Annihilators (6-4):
Antwerp has turned a corner in Season 8 and looks poised to make their first post-season appearance since being promoted from AAA. A clock-chewing rushing attack led by HB Arch Griffin (883 yards, 21 TDs) has bolstered a short passing attack anchored by Griffin’s backfield mate Rick Fastely (44 catches, 435 yards, 2 TDs). As good as the offense has been (and it’s been good), the defense has been better. SS Kerry Rhodez (53 Tackles, 9 PDs, 1 FF) and LB James Laurinaltis (50 Tackles, 2 Hurries, 17 PDs, 1 INT) have paved the way for this active unit that has only allowed more than 30 points 3 times in 10 games. With two of their final games being against the hapless Naranjas and Longnecks the Twerps are in good position to get to 8 wins. But it might take as many as 10 wins to secure a playoff spot thanks to early season losses to ATOIC and the Rippers -- meaning they will have to find a way to rake out two wins against the likes of Lyon, Stockholm, GRD and Korb. That’s a tall order.
7. A Team of Ice and Fire (5-5):
Ice & Fire might be making their first playoff appearance since joining WEPL if things continue to break their way. A 5-5 start may not seem all that impressive, but if you factor in close loses to BFM and the Pimps and the fact that all 5 loses have been to top 5 teams (in both conferences) then Ice & Fire’s 5-5 start begins to look more and more impressive. Thanks to the League’s best return man CB Lord Varys The Spider, HB Areo Hotah and Tyrlon Lannister have had short fields to work with as both backs have for over 2,200 yards and 23 TDs. The only problem for Ice & Fire has been their inability to pressure opposing QBs. In 10 games they have managed only 12 hurries and 1 sack – numbers that don’t bode well as they prepare to face Berlin, Dallas, both London teams and Stockholm to finish out the year. They will have to find a way to win at least 4 of those final 6 games to reach the playoffs.
8. London Rippers (5-5):
The Rippers have started to make some noise lately – and not just on the WEPL forums. Their 26-24 victory over the Annihilators capped a recent 2 game win streak after a slow start to the year. At 5-5 the Rippers are very much alive in the playoff race and will have key games against Ice & Fire and Berlin in Weeks 14 and 15 to secure their spot. In order to do so they will have to rely WR Cliff Brighton (66 catches, 1,097 yards, 7 TDs) and their terrific defense who is led by Defensive Player of the Year candidates LB Blitz Smith (99 Tackles, 6 Hurries, 2 Sacks, 28 PDs, 1 FF) and LB Smash Jenkins (73 Tackles, 14 Hurries, 2 Sacks). Both ‘backers have been explosive all year long in helping propel a defense that has only surrendered 30+ points ONCE all year long. With a defense like that the Rippers are extremely dangerous and have every opportunity to make noise if and when they make the playoffs.
9. Berlin Ballers (5-5):
Berlin is quietly picking up momentum thanks to a recent 2 game winning streak over the Bluebirds and Black Knights. After a frustrating first half of the year in which the Ballers went 0-4 against the top 4 teams in Zeta, Berlin has begun to find their stride thanks to HB Joachim Morrigan’s 1245 yards and 16 TDs. LB Cameron House (59 Tackles, 5 PDs) recent play has allowed pass rushing specialists DT Sienna Miller (47 tackles, 10 Hurries, 5 Sacks, 1 INT) and DE Magnus Samuelsson (24 Tackles, 6 Hurries, 6 Sacks, 1 PD) to do their thing which has helped the defense rebound from a slow start to the season. The best news for the Ballers is that their toughest games are behind them. Match ups against both London teams, Ice & Fire and the Pimps should create some drama and help sort out the playoff picture. Expect Berlin to take at least 4 of the last 6 games and secure a playoff bid.
10. London Hitmen (5-5):
Despite a 4-1 start to the year, the Hitmen are still on the outside looking in at the playoff picture thanks to a recent 1-4 skid. With all four losses coming to Top 8 teams, questions have begun to arise as to how good the Hitmen really are. Can they truly compete with the upper echelon of Zeta or are they destined to stay in the middle of the pack this year? DT Jimbo Double Wide (33 Tackles, 7 Hurries, 5 Sacks, 2 PDs) certainly thinks the Hitmen can compete with the big boys. His great play has elevated the entire defense and together with SS D.P Plugger (48 Tackles, 4 Hurries, 2 Sacks, 3 PDs) is on everyone’s short list of Pro Bowlers. Still, for the Hitmen to make the playoffs they are going to need to get more from their offense, especially QB Ace Gunner and the WR corps. Gunner has been good this year (60% Completion, 2,324 yards) but has only tossed 9 TDs to 5 INTs. The lack of a reliable running game has been partially to blame as has the lack of a true target for Gunner in the Red Zone. TE James Kirk leads the team with 46 catches but only has 1 TD to show for it. If the Hitmen hope to make the playoffs, they are going to have to beat Berlin in Week 14 and find a way to squeeze out 3 more wins along the way.
11. Dallas Browns (3-7):
The Browns have been an enigma all season long. In just their first WEPL season, Dallas has come close to knocking off the Meatballs, Grizzlies, Destroyers, and BFM – losing by a combined 20 points. But those close loses have been confounded by frustrating loses to Edinburgh and GRD. The HB pairing of Gabriel Knight and Shel Dawg has combined for over 1,800 yards and 13 TDs. LB Kyle Carson is having a Pro Bowl year himself with 58 tackles, helping led the defense to a very respectable 16th ranking overall. Still, at 3-7 the playoffs are a long shot. In order to make it they’d need to win out AND get help. Regardless, while this season hasn’t been the success Dallas has hoped for, they have shown they have the talent and coaching to compete in WEPL.
12. Lyon Dynasty (3-7):
An 0-6 start not only stupefied Lyon Fans but many prognosticators as well as Lyon had been picked in the preseason to make a strong push for the Zeta crown. Things seem to be turning around though as Lyon is currently riding a 3-1 streak including a big win over the Divots in Week 8. Their final 6 games are all against teals with equal or better records making reaching the playoffs a long shot at best. However, if they can continue to improve and finish with 4 or 5 wins, the outlook for Season 9 will be bright.
13. Cardiff Bluebirds (3-7):
Unlike Lyon, Cardiff is currently on the wrong side of a streak – a 3 game losing streak. After a close lose to BFM, the Bluebirds have spiraled with back to back to back losses to the Pimps, Ice & Fire and Berlin. With Dallas, both London teams, Lyon and Stockholm left on the schedule things don’t look to be getting any better. Still, the Bluebirds have shown some teeth. HB Johnny Nitro has been brilliant racking up 1,556 yards and 15 TDs while leading Cardiff to the 9th ranked rushing offense in WEPL. Relegation is not a fear here, for the Bluebirds they should be focused on tweaking the talent they have and preparing to make a serious playoff run in Season 9.
14. Edinburgh Black Knights (2-8):
The Black Knights join Lyon and PPP as the most disappointing teams in Season 8. After a strong Season 7, many expected the Black Knights to be strong playoff contenders throughout the year. While the Black Knights have been in nearly every game they’ve played thus far this year – close isn’t good enough for this team who had title aspirations in the pre-season. The team’s 10th ranked defense and 13th ranked offense despite a 2-8 record is a testament to how close the Black Knights have come to turning things around. This should serve as a warning to the final 6 teams on the Black Knights’ schedule. I wouldn’t be surprised to see the Knights pull off a major upset or two in the coming weeks.
15. PPP Longnecks (1-9):
After overhauling the front office, PPP Owner Vabills purged many of his team’s stalwarts and has since been trying to rebuild the Longnecks. The road has been rough as they have been on the wrong side of more blowouts this year than ever before in their rich history. Even Week 11’s rivalry game against the Meatballs can’t do too much to restore the luster for the Longnecks. A serious rebuilding effort in both personnel and tactics needs to be undertaken before the Longnecks can crawl out of the basement. With a brutal schedule to finish the year, relegation appears to be a certainty.
16. Sevilla Naranjas (0-10):
The Naranjas are heading for AAA in Season 9, but they should have their heads held high. Rather than taking the easy way out and folding the franchise, the front office of Sevilla is committed to rebuilding the team through free agency. It will be a long road for them, but as the Musketeers are showing in AAA – a quick return to WEPL is not out of the question.
Mid Season Pro-Bowl Team
Alpha:
QB: Steve Tarkenton (Philharmonics)
Tarkenton’s 120.8 QB rating leads Alpha and his 1,702 passing yards, 70% completion rating and 24 TDs is equally as impressive. However the most mind boggling stat is in 252 passes this season, Steve has 0 INTs. It also doesn’t hurt that he has Paris in line for a playoff birth as well.
HB: TJ Crimson (Dream Bolts)
A league leading 27 TDs as well as an Alpha leading 1,604 yards rushing with a 4.8 YPCA is the main reason why the Dream Bolts are 8-2 and in line for a Top 4 seed. Crimson has fumbled only once this year on 334 carries making him one of the more dependable backs in GLB.
HB: Jaquan-Juan Tomba (Dynamo)
With a 5 YPCA, 1,105 rushing yards, 19TDs and 0 Fumbles, Tomba has been the key to the Dynamo’s 7-3 start. He edges out Woodridge Joseph Ngo for the second spot in a very close race.
WR: Ellis Carver (Lumberjacks)
74 grabs for 791 yards and 9 TDs is impressive. 0 drops is even more impressive. Carver is a big play threat whenever he touches the ball, averaging almost 11 yards per reception.
WR: Joe Chang (Philharmonics)
54 grabs for 563 yards aren’t exactly all star numbers. But 12 TDs in 10 games is. Chang accounts for 50% of Tarkenton’s TDs and is a key reason for Paris being in the top half of the playoff picture.
WR: Moises Santana (Commandos)
Despite only grabbing 36 balls, Santana has made his presence felt with 7 TDs, 631 yards and an eye-popping 17.5 yards per reception average.
TE: Eddie Smith (Wrecking Crew)
With 52 catches for 522 yards and 3 TDs, Smith is Aberdeens leading passing threat. Plus, he blocks fairly well for a receiving TE.
OT: Brian Crusher (Dream Bolts)
161 Pancakes are rather relative. But being the anchor for a team that has only allowed 6 sacks all year is not.
OT: Jake Long (Dream Bolts)
104 Pancakes and the bookend for the best pass-blocking O-Line in Alpha.
OG: G Stcheng (Philharmonics)
A Conference high 176 pancake blocks while keeping Tarkenton upright.
OG: Langko Baby (Thunder)
131 Pancakes is impressive – being the best O-Linemen on the Thunder is even more so.
C: Celia Cipher (Philharmonics)
The man in the pivot for one of GLB’s better offensive lines has racked up the stats.
DE: Jimmy Johnston (Wrecking Crew)
97 tackles, 26 sacks, 9 hurries, 33 tackles for a loss, 2 PDs makes him not only a pro bowler but a DPOY candidate. If he can lead Aberdeen to the playoffs for the first time in 3 seasons he might just nab the MVP as well.
DE: Omnipotent Nihility (Philharmonic)
17 hurries 5 FFs and 16 sacks is nothing to sneeze at.
DT: Alex Panda (Perkis)
25 tackles, 23 hurries, 6 sacks, 4 FFs is impressive no matter what your team’s record.
DT: Leon (Lumberjacks)
43 Tackles, 7 hurries, 5 sacks, 1 PD and 1 INT make Leon a force to be reckoned with in the middle of the defense.
LB: Bell Ringer Rogers (Monarchs)
91 tackles, 5 hurries, 4 sacks, 8 TFL, 16 PDs and 3 INTs prove that Rogers can do it all. Of course when you’re on the field as much as the Monarch’s D is, you get lots of chances.
LB: Kamerlon Winbley (Dream Bolts)
65 tackles, 3 hurries, 4 sacks, 13 PDs and 1 INT on one of the league’s best LB corps.
LB: Horace Horsecollar (Commandos)
54 tackles, 15 PDs, 2 INTs have helped keep the Commandos in the playoff picture.
LB: Manny Mo (Black Watch)
72 Tackles, 1 hurry, 3 sacks, 10 PDs and 1 INT. Enough said.
CB: Wolfgang Mitermeyer (Philharmonic)
Wolfgang leads Alpha in picks with 5 plus has 31 tackles, 33 PDs and two INT return for TDs this year.
CB: Wild Rych (Dynamo)
41 tackles, 4 INTs and 22 PDs shows how effective Rych has been. He shuts down half the field and teams rarely throw on him.
CB: Champ Coladidis (Perkis)
3 INTs and counting this year, 2 of which were returned for TDs. Add on 33 Tackles and 33 PDs and you’re looking at an all star.
FS: Walter von Schenkopp (Philharmonic)
Walter rounds out an impressive crop of Paris all stars but his 41 tackles, 23 PDs, 3 INTs and 1 TD more qualify him to play centerfield in anyone’s defense.
SS: Oliver Tullock (E-City)
The closest race in all the positions, Tullock’s 61 tackles, 3 INTs, 2 FFs and 29 PDs gives Oliver the edge over his competition.
Zeta
QB: Dimitri Makarov (Ballers)
The best of his class in a down year for passers in Zeta. Makarov’s 2, 151 yards passing, 57% completion rating and 17 TDs has kept Berlin afloat in the playoff picture.
HB: Mal Brown (Meatballs)
Mal leads the league in nearly every rushing category with 1,917 yards, 23 TDs and a 4.7 YPCA. Plus, with 407 carries to date Mal has 0 fumbles making him the key to the Meatballs’ title hopes.
HB: Areo Hotah (Ice & Fire)
Hotah is nearly single handedly kept the Ice & Fire offense moving with his 1,667 yards and 17 TDs.
FB: Austin Wang (Meatballs)
Doesn’t have a single carry this year but paves the way for the league’s best rushing attack.
WR: Cliff Brighton (Rippers)
66 grabs for 1,097 yards and 7 TDs plus an impressive 16 yards per reception average is nothing compared to his 0 drops all year. The Rippers will go only as far as Brighton can carry them.
WR. Montgomery Brogan (Meatballs)
Despite playing for the power rushing Meatballs, Brogan has made his presence felt with 49 grabs for 625 yards and a conference high 7 TDs.
WR: Rod Tidwell (GRD)
58 grabs for 663 yards, 3 TDs and an 11.4 yards per reception average has him near the top of the class in every major receiving category.
TE: Kevin Atkinson (Destroyers)
The dynamic TE is second in the conference in receiving yards with 882. He also has snagged 2 TDs while finding time to block as well.
OT: Reggie Youngblood (Pimps)
A great anchor with 176 Pancakes.
OT: Johnny Forcefield (Meatballs)
The bookend for a team who has given up the least amount of sacks. He also paves the way for Mal Brown and company.
OG: Andre the Giant (BFM)
A league high 163 pancakes while anchoring the middle of one of Zeta’s best offensive lines.
OG: Corey Gaines (Meatballs)
The converted center routinely opens holes for the power rushing attack of Stockholm.
C: Snot Dangler (Meatballs)
Has manned the pivot for the Meatballs for nearly 8 years and is showing no signs of aging.
DE: Magnus Samuelsson (Ballers)
His 6 sacks are second in Zeta and he continues to be a force off the edge, despite Bort’s nerfs.
DE: Gut Maximus (Stockholm)
The former AAA DPOY has started to turn on the jets with 6 sacks this year.
DT: Sienna Miller (Ballers)
47 tackles, 10 hurries and 5 sacks have kept the Ballers in the hunt and Miller in our hearts.
DT: Force Trucks (Naranjas)
With 16 hurries, 6 sacks and 52 tackles, he’s the best player on a rebuilding team and has put up impressive numbers against good offensive lines.
LB: Blitz Smith (Rippers)
A league high 99 tackles, 2 sacks, 1 FF, 6 Hurries and 28 PDs has him in line for DPOY honors and the Rippers in line for a deep playoff run.
LB: Bobby Brooks (Black Knights)
Second in the conference with 73 tackles, 6 sacks, Brooks has also chipped in with 1 INT which he returned for a TD.
LB: Shade Tree (GRD)
52 Tackles, 2 Hurries, 3 PDs, 3 INTs, 1 FF has led the Divots to the upper echelon of Zeta clubs.
LB: Smash Jenkins (Rippers)
Outshined slightly by his teammate smith, Jenkins is among the league leaders in hurries (13) while piling up 71 tackles, 2 sacks and 17 PDs.
CB: Killswitch Engage (BFM)
Leading the conference with 8 sacks is impressive for a CB. The fact that he only has 19 tackles and 5 PDs proves that teams just don’t throw his way.
CB: Sticky F1ngaz (Dynasty)
Has 3 INTs, two of which he returned for TDs. Also has chipped in 26 tackles, 2 sacks and 12 PDs.
CB: Pat Monk (Meatballs)
13 tackles, 2 INTs and 14 PDs – he has shut down half the field for the Meatballs all season long.
FS: Pico De Gailo (Meatballs)
Part of the best FS/SS tandem in Zeta, Pico has 29 tackles, 3 INTs, 3 TDs and 5 PDs.
SS: CJ DeCoud (Meatballs)
His 51 tackles may not seem like that much, but its when he makes them that counts. 5 TFL, 4 Hurries and 4 PDs shows he’s flying around the ball. DeCoud is in the running for DPOY for the impact he’s made on the Meatballs defense.
MVP RACE
Alpha:
Steve Tarkenton (QB, Philharmonics)
TJ Crimson (HB, Dream Bolts)
Elis Carver (WR, WuJax)
Jimmy Johnston (DE, AWC)
Zeta:
Mal Brown (HB, Meatballs)
Cliff Brighton (WR, Rippers)
Millhouse McKenzie (HB, BFM)
Blitz Smith (LB, Rippers)
Offensive Player of the Year:
Alpha
Steve Tarkenton (QB)
TJ Crimson (HB)
Elis Carver (WR)
Juquan-Juan Tomba (HB)
Mario Stanfield (QB)
Zeta:
Mal Brown (HB)
Cliff Brighton (WR)
Millhouse McKenzie (HB)
Montgomery Brogan (WR)
Areo Hotah (HB)
Defensive Player of the Year:
Alpha:
Jimmy Johnston (DE)
Omnipotent Nihility (DE)
Oliver Tullock (SS)
Horace Horsecollar (LB)
Alex Panda (DT)
Zeta
Killswitch Engage (CB)
Shade Tree (LB)
Tex Willer (SS)
CJ DeCoud (SS)
Durn da Return (CB)
The Corner has been long overdue this season thanks to the damn suits that run Hollywood who have kept this intrepid reporter busy with deadlines and meetings. Rat bastids!!!!
But now the Corner is back and will be releasing my first Power Rankings of the season as well as an MVP race update and my Mid Season Pro Bowl teams.
You’ve all waited long enough … so let’s get to it!
Power Rankings: Week 10:
Alpha Conference:
1. Graz Grizzlies (10-0):
In just their second year in WEPL, the Grizzlies have flown out to an impressive 10-0 start behind the arm of QB Matt Man and the legs of WR Woody Wayne. The two have hooked up for 5 of Man’s 15 TDs this season making Wayne the Grizzlie’s primary scoring threat. But WR Pedal TotheMetal can’t be overlooked as the possession receiver has nabbed 50 balls for close to 400 yards in just 10 games. The defense has been impressive too as the LB trio of Bob Carter, Paddy Willis and Bjorn Staelens have combined for 136 tackles, 31 PDs, 2 INTs and 2 FFs. Impressive wins over Paris, Belfast, Bonn and Paris have paved the way for a an easier finish in which the Grizzlies will only face 3 teams in the Top 8 over their final 6 games.
2. Paris Dream Bolts (8-2):
Paris came up a point short against the Grizzlies in Week 10, putting them firmly in the passenger’s seat in Alpha. But with the League’s 4th ranked offense and defense, the Dream Bolts can’t be overlooked. Led by HB TJ Crimson’s WEPL leading 27 TDs, the Bolts have been able to cover up for a lack of a solid passing game and keep their defense fresh. With a final 6 games that includes 2 against gutted teams, the Bolts are in great shape to steal a 2nd or even a 1st seed should the Grizzlies stumble.
3. Woodridge Lumberjacks (8-2):
The defending Alpha champs have experienced and up and down season thus far. The shine on Wujax’s impressive wins over Cardiff, Belfast, Aberdeen and Toulouse (prior to them being gutted) have been dulled slightly by losses to Bonn and the Dream Bolts. A tough final 6 games pits the Wujax against the Mercs, Phillies, Grizzlies, Black Watch, Thunder and Monarchs. That final stretch will really prove whether or not the Lumberjacks have the chops to defend their crown. The burden will fall upon QB Mario Stanfield to build upon his great season thus far (15 TDs to just 3 INTs) if the Lumberjacks hope to get through that stretch at 4-2 or better.
4. Bonn Dynamo (7-3):
Led by one of WEPL’s most dynamic backfield duos, the Dynamo have sprinted out to an impressive 7-3 start in their debut season. Multi talented HB Sven Shiner has been brilliant catching passes out of the backfield with his team high 44 receptions. His backfield mate Juaquan-Juan Tomba has piled up the yards on the ground while reaching pay dirt 19 times. However a recent 2 game skid, including a surprising 23-20 loss to the slumping Black Watch, have created some doubt around the Dynamo’s ability to win once the playoffs start and is the reason why they are ranked one spot below the Wujax whom they defeated in 5 this season. A relatively soft closing schedule should allow the Dynamo to get to 11 or 12 wins with ease – the question though is what happens next?
5. Paris Philharmonic (6-4):
After a scary 1-4 start, the Philharmonics have bounced back to win their last 5 games in a row, including big wins over Aberdeen and Belfast which may prove to be vital tie breakers later on in the season. Close loses to Graz (3 points) and Dream Bolts (5 points) prove that this team can hang with the upper echelon of the Conference. If they are going to make any noise in the playoffs they will need to get more from their 29th ranked offense. Despite QB Steve Tarkenton’s great stats (24 TDs and 0 INTs), Paris has been unable to find a running game which has stalled drives and put their defense in some untenable situations. With weapons like WR Reggie 3 Forever (52 catches, 7 TDs) and Joe Chang (54 catches, 12 TDs), the Philharmonic have the talent to surprise some people come playoff time.
6. Belfast Commandos (6-4):
Defense gives Belfast the edge over the other two remaining 6-4 clubs. With the League’s 7th ranked defensive unit, the Commandos have been in every game they’ve played but for their Week 2 blowout loss to the Grizzlies. Led by LB Horace Horsecollar’s 54 tackles and 2 INTs, the Commandos have the ability to keep opponents out of the end zone. The problem has been Belfast’s own inability to maintain a constant offensive attack. Despite QB Tone Romo’s 21 TDs so far this year, the rushing game has been virtually non-existent, cashing a mere 6 times so far this season. With three brutal games left against Bonn, the Dream Bolts and Mercs, Belfast will need to find a way to squeeze more offense out of their roster so that their defense doesn’t need to shoulder so much of the burden.
7. E-City Mercenaries (6-4):
HB Duncan Idaho’s 1,162 yards and 17 TDs leads the way for WEPL’s 16th ranked rushing attack. On the other side of the ball, SS Oliver Tuck’s 61 tackles, 29 PDs, 3 INTs and 2 FF puts him on the short list for Defensive Player of the Year honors. Tucks play combined with the Merc’s grind-it-out style of play has vaulted E-City’s D to 17th overall in the League. Still, the secondary has been torched, as teams have routinely passed for over 300 yards. With a brutal finish to their season, including games against the Grizzlies, Aberdeen and Belfast, the Mercs will have to shore up their D in order to secure a playoff bid. If they don’t, they could slip behind Black Watch or Lyon in the tiebreaker category.
8. Aberdeen Wrecking Crew (6-4):
A 3-0 start was doused by back to back loses to Woodridge and Belfast – however no loss was more crippling than AWC’s Week 10 loss to the slumping Monarchs. For the past several seasons much has been expected from Aberdeen’s star-studded roster. With two time WEPL Player of the Year Jimmy Johnston anchoring their defense, it’s hard to fathom that this club has failed to make the playoffs for 3 straight seasons. Their 6-4 start gives the Aberdeen faithful some hope – however their atrocious pass defense (ranked last in the league) has allowed teams to find the end zone often; even with Johnston racking up 26 sacks thus far this year. The offense hasn’t faired much better as QB Laser Rocketarm has been pedestrian and HB Tank Smasher has a YPC of only 3.8 despite 11 TDs. With 4 of their remaining 6 games coming against Top 8 teams, Aberdeen will have to go at least 3-3 to secure their first playoff birth in over 3 seasons. I’m not sure they have what it takes to get it done.
9. Black Watch (5-5):
The hangover continues for Black Watch. After a disappointing Season 7, the Watch have not rebounded as well as many expected. An 2-5 start seemed to sink the Black Watch as they looked lost on both sides of the ball. QB Jack Winters has been sacked 16 times while only finding the end zone 10. Their three headed rushing attack has put up great numbers between the 20s – but once in the red zone the touchdowns have been hard to find. On defense, the once proud unit was pushed around by middle of the pack clubs like Aberdeen and Turin. However, a fresh 3 game winning streak, capped off by a huge 23-20 upset of Bonn last week, has the Black Watch fans feeling the excitement once again. K Austin Moore’s last second 48 yard FG gave Black Watch the win and a new hope for a playoff birth. But it won’t be easy. With the Dream Bolts, Mercs, Grizzlies and Lumberjacks left, Black Watch is going to need beat at least 2 if not 3 of those teams to catch one of the 6-4 teams.
10. West Wales Warriors (4-6):
Despite losing 4 games in a row (all to Top 8 clubs) and losing to the Sharks earlier in the season – the Warriors grab the 10th spot in the rankings ahead of Lyon on the strength of their play. In all four of their recent loses (to Bonn, Dream Bolts, Woodridge and E-City), Wales has kept it close and even had a shot to steal two of those games. Led by HB Dennis Riddle’s 17 TDs and QB Johnny Oscar’s gun-slinging mentality (16 TDs to 10 INTs), the Warriors can put up points on anyone. It’s just their defense that has let them down. Ranked 28th overall in the League, the D has been just as bad at stopping the run as they are the pass. If they can’t find a playmaker to step up and help elevate the D, it’s going to fall upon the offense’s shoulders to keep piling up the points. This should make for an entertaining finish as they face the playoff hungry Black Watch, AWC and Belfast over the next 5 games. While the playoffs look like a long shot for these Warriors, an upset or two might not be so far fetched.
11. Lyon Sharks (4-6):
For the Sharks, their first season in WEPL has been a frustrating one. After a surprising 2-1 start, including a win over the Mercs, the Sharks thought it was going to be smooth sailing. However, after losing 5 of their next 7 games, things are looking mighty bleak in Lyon. Desperate to shake things up, starting QB, and WEPL vet. Philipp Pohl has been traded signaling perhaps the beginning of a move towards Lyon folding up their tents. With only a CPU QB behind Pohl, the offense will struggle to replace Pohls 2,331 yards and 16 TDs to date. Factor in tough remaining games against the Phillies, Dynamo and Dream Bolts and 5-11 is not just a possibility, but likely.
12. Turin THUNDER (3-7):
Turin gets the nod over the Monarchs here based purely on instinct on my part. Both Turin and the Monarchs have only one quality win each – each against a different opponent. However, the Monarchs are WEPL Royalty and even when they are bad they are expected to be better than WEPL rookies like the Thunder. Thus, I have to give Turin their due. Thanks to WEPL veteran HB Ankle Breaka’s 19 TDs and 849 yards rushing, the Thunder have been able to control the clock and put points on the board. Sadly, their own defense has been unable to stop anyone else from scoring. A favorable schedule down the stretch gives fans hopes that the Thunder can get to 6 wins or better before the year is out – however a playoff bid is about as likely as me finding time to do the Corner every week.
13. London Monarchs (3-7):
After losing 7 of their first 8 games, the Monarchs found their mojo thanks to a 255-0 thrashing of a helpless CPU team. Still, the hangover from that lopsided win not only affected the Monarch’s stat page, it seemed to kick start their energy level as they followed that up with an impressive 21-17 point win over The Wrecking Crew. At 3-7 it would take a miracle run for the Monarchs to turn around their season and make the playoffs, but it’s not entirely impossible. The toughest game left on their schedule is against Woodridge and it comes the last week of the season. The rest of their games, while difficult, are winnable. If the Monarchs can get on a roll, their momentum might make it interesting down the stretch.
14. Team Perkis (1-9):
Not much to say here. Perkis has been the whipping boy for everyone in Alpha this season but they got their chance to dole out some punishment of their own in Week 10 as they blasted the gutted Aviators 255-0. The only thing keeping Perkis in WEPL is the fact that both Dinas and Toulouse were gutted. It’s time to start planning for Season 9 for Perkis. If they can’t bring in some playmakers or coaches to turn things around, they could find themselves back in AAA by Season 10.
15. Dinas Red Bandits (1-9):
It’s ugly right now in Dinas as they continue to rebuild. With 6 games left it will only get uglier. It’s sad to see such a fun franchise in the gutter right now. Here’s hoping for a quick rebound.
16. Toulouse Aviators (1-9):
Toulouse, we hardly knew ya!
Zeta:
1. Stockholm Meatballs (10-0):
Not content to rest on their laurels after their unexpected WEPL title run last season, the Meatballs have been quietly adding talent to their roster throughout the off season and regular season. New additions such as WR Montgomery Brogan (49 catches, 625 yards and 7 TDs), NT Arthur Riot (27 tackles), DE Hawk Davis (2 Sacks), LB Shaun Nickerson (28 Tackles, 8 PDs) and Defensive Player of the Year candidate SS C.J. DeCoud (51 Tackles, 4 PDs) have bolstered an already talented roster. Factor in the recent signing of HB Iam Legend who will join WELP’s leading MVP candidate HB Mal Brown (1,917 yards and 23 TDs) and the Meatballs are poised to make a serious run at a second straight Zeta title. With WEPL’s number 1 ranked defense and 9th ranked offense, the Meatballs have sprinted out to a 10-0 start. A huge Week 13 showdown with the undefeated Black Forest Mercenaries will not only be entertaining, but should go a long ways towards figuring out who the team to beat in WEPL is.
2. Black Forest Mercenaries (10-0):
Despite being 10-0, the Mercs get slotted behind Stockholm thanks in large part to their strength of schedule. The Mercs have rolled through their schedule thus far, but with games left against GRD, Korb and Stockholm, the Mercenaries haven’t faced as many of the top 5 teams as the Meatballs have. Led by HB Millhouse McKenzie’s 1,127 Yards and 15 TDs, the Mercs run a ball control offense and bank on their brilliant defense led by CBs Dalton Jay (42 Tackles, 51 PDs, 2 INTs) and Killswitch Engage (19 Tackles, 8 Sacks, 13 Hurries, 5 PDs). The results have been a number of close wins (4 wins by 7 or less this year) that should help strengthen their intestinal fortitude come playoff time. With their brutal finishing schedule, the Mercs will have every opportunity to prove they belong at Number 1 on these rankings. Either way, anything less than a deep playoff run will constitute a major disappointment for these Mercenaries.
3. Korb Destroyers (8-2):
A flurry of trades over the past few days has crippled the Destroyers chemistry but should serve them well in the long run. The front office has been busy, bringing in DT Brickwall Scorsone, DE Xenon Blue and WR Henriques the Englishmen while bidding goodbye to TE Hans Silberbach, WR Shawn Wellington, G Jim Rokame and CB Arno Wellington. The new additions didn’t pay off in their Week 10 match up with Stockholm in which they fell 26-9, but with games against Sevilla and PPP sandwiched between match ups with GRD, the Pimps, Annihilators and BFM, there should be enough time for the new guys to gel with the rest of the roster. 10 wins is a certainty for this club, and there’s a good chance they can get 13 or more; making this a very dangerous team come playoff time.
4. Grass Root Divots (8-2):
The Divots shook off a two game losing streak by beating up on the hapless Naranjas 59-13 in Week 10. The win stops the bleeding and gets the team refocused just in time for their key match up with the Pimps and Destroyers over the next two weeks. Led by a low risk, high completion, two headed passing attack (QBs Payton Tarkenton and Rommel Irons have combined for over 3,223 yards, 16 TDs and just 6 INTs), the Divots have been able to put up points in bunches this year. The defense hasn’t been bad either as LB Shade Tree (52 Tackles, 2 Hurries, 3 PDs, 3 INTs, 1 FF) and SS Tex Willer (51 Tackles, 30 PDs, 1 INT, 1 FF) are both in the running for Defensive Player of the Year honors. The Divots closing schedule is by no means easy and they will be tested by not only the Pimps and Destroyers but Annihilators, Mercenaries and Black Knights as well. A 4-2 finish should be enough to guarantee a Top 4 seed and could very well be likely.
5. Rivals Mainboard Pimps (7-3):
The Pimps have been snake bit this year. An OT loss to Stockholm and close loss to rival Antwerp shows that the Pimps are indeed back and capable of playing with, and beating, anyone. Still, the Pimps inability to win those close games – something that has haunted them in the past – looms large as they close out Season 8. While the Pimps have been traditionally known for their high flying offense, this season it’s been their defense that has led the way. DE Greg Kelly (4 Sacks, 3 Hurries, 2 FF), LB Big Baby Jesus (50 Tackles, 5 Hurries, 5 PDs, 1 FF) and CB Durn da Return (29 Tackles, 21 PD, 2 INTs) have taken the reigns of the defense and led them 8th overall in the WEPL. With HBs MB III and Mike Imoh combining for 17 TDs so far this season, the Pimps have the ability to grind out the clock and rely on their defense to close the door on their opponents. A tough closing schedule includes match ups with GRD, Berlin, Korb, Dallas and the Hitmen.
6. Antwerp Annihilators (6-4):
Antwerp has turned a corner in Season 8 and looks poised to make their first post-season appearance since being promoted from AAA. A clock-chewing rushing attack led by HB Arch Griffin (883 yards, 21 TDs) has bolstered a short passing attack anchored by Griffin’s backfield mate Rick Fastely (44 catches, 435 yards, 2 TDs). As good as the offense has been (and it’s been good), the defense has been better. SS Kerry Rhodez (53 Tackles, 9 PDs, 1 FF) and LB James Laurinaltis (50 Tackles, 2 Hurries, 17 PDs, 1 INT) have paved the way for this active unit that has only allowed more than 30 points 3 times in 10 games. With two of their final games being against the hapless Naranjas and Longnecks the Twerps are in good position to get to 8 wins. But it might take as many as 10 wins to secure a playoff spot thanks to early season losses to ATOIC and the Rippers -- meaning they will have to find a way to rake out two wins against the likes of Lyon, Stockholm, GRD and Korb. That’s a tall order.
7. A Team of Ice and Fire (5-5):
Ice & Fire might be making their first playoff appearance since joining WEPL if things continue to break their way. A 5-5 start may not seem all that impressive, but if you factor in close loses to BFM and the Pimps and the fact that all 5 loses have been to top 5 teams (in both conferences) then Ice & Fire’s 5-5 start begins to look more and more impressive. Thanks to the League’s best return man CB Lord Varys The Spider, HB Areo Hotah and Tyrlon Lannister have had short fields to work with as both backs have for over 2,200 yards and 23 TDs. The only problem for Ice & Fire has been their inability to pressure opposing QBs. In 10 games they have managed only 12 hurries and 1 sack – numbers that don’t bode well as they prepare to face Berlin, Dallas, both London teams and Stockholm to finish out the year. They will have to find a way to win at least 4 of those final 6 games to reach the playoffs.
8. London Rippers (5-5):
The Rippers have started to make some noise lately – and not just on the WEPL forums. Their 26-24 victory over the Annihilators capped a recent 2 game win streak after a slow start to the year. At 5-5 the Rippers are very much alive in the playoff race and will have key games against Ice & Fire and Berlin in Weeks 14 and 15 to secure their spot. In order to do so they will have to rely WR Cliff Brighton (66 catches, 1,097 yards, 7 TDs) and their terrific defense who is led by Defensive Player of the Year candidates LB Blitz Smith (99 Tackles, 6 Hurries, 2 Sacks, 28 PDs, 1 FF) and LB Smash Jenkins (73 Tackles, 14 Hurries, 2 Sacks). Both ‘backers have been explosive all year long in helping propel a defense that has only surrendered 30+ points ONCE all year long. With a defense like that the Rippers are extremely dangerous and have every opportunity to make noise if and when they make the playoffs.
9. Berlin Ballers (5-5):
Berlin is quietly picking up momentum thanks to a recent 2 game winning streak over the Bluebirds and Black Knights. After a frustrating first half of the year in which the Ballers went 0-4 against the top 4 teams in Zeta, Berlin has begun to find their stride thanks to HB Joachim Morrigan’s 1245 yards and 16 TDs. LB Cameron House (59 Tackles, 5 PDs) recent play has allowed pass rushing specialists DT Sienna Miller (47 tackles, 10 Hurries, 5 Sacks, 1 INT) and DE Magnus Samuelsson (24 Tackles, 6 Hurries, 6 Sacks, 1 PD) to do their thing which has helped the defense rebound from a slow start to the season. The best news for the Ballers is that their toughest games are behind them. Match ups against both London teams, Ice & Fire and the Pimps should create some drama and help sort out the playoff picture. Expect Berlin to take at least 4 of the last 6 games and secure a playoff bid.
10. London Hitmen (5-5):
Despite a 4-1 start to the year, the Hitmen are still on the outside looking in at the playoff picture thanks to a recent 1-4 skid. With all four losses coming to Top 8 teams, questions have begun to arise as to how good the Hitmen really are. Can they truly compete with the upper echelon of Zeta or are they destined to stay in the middle of the pack this year? DT Jimbo Double Wide (33 Tackles, 7 Hurries, 5 Sacks, 2 PDs) certainly thinks the Hitmen can compete with the big boys. His great play has elevated the entire defense and together with SS D.P Plugger (48 Tackles, 4 Hurries, 2 Sacks, 3 PDs) is on everyone’s short list of Pro Bowlers. Still, for the Hitmen to make the playoffs they are going to need to get more from their offense, especially QB Ace Gunner and the WR corps. Gunner has been good this year (60% Completion, 2,324 yards) but has only tossed 9 TDs to 5 INTs. The lack of a reliable running game has been partially to blame as has the lack of a true target for Gunner in the Red Zone. TE James Kirk leads the team with 46 catches but only has 1 TD to show for it. If the Hitmen hope to make the playoffs, they are going to have to beat Berlin in Week 14 and find a way to squeeze out 3 more wins along the way.
11. Dallas Browns (3-7):
The Browns have been an enigma all season long. In just their first WEPL season, Dallas has come close to knocking off the Meatballs, Grizzlies, Destroyers, and BFM – losing by a combined 20 points. But those close loses have been confounded by frustrating loses to Edinburgh and GRD. The HB pairing of Gabriel Knight and Shel Dawg has combined for over 1,800 yards and 13 TDs. LB Kyle Carson is having a Pro Bowl year himself with 58 tackles, helping led the defense to a very respectable 16th ranking overall. Still, at 3-7 the playoffs are a long shot. In order to make it they’d need to win out AND get help. Regardless, while this season hasn’t been the success Dallas has hoped for, they have shown they have the talent and coaching to compete in WEPL.
12. Lyon Dynasty (3-7):
An 0-6 start not only stupefied Lyon Fans but many prognosticators as well as Lyon had been picked in the preseason to make a strong push for the Zeta crown. Things seem to be turning around though as Lyon is currently riding a 3-1 streak including a big win over the Divots in Week 8. Their final 6 games are all against teals with equal or better records making reaching the playoffs a long shot at best. However, if they can continue to improve and finish with 4 or 5 wins, the outlook for Season 9 will be bright.
13. Cardiff Bluebirds (3-7):
Unlike Lyon, Cardiff is currently on the wrong side of a streak – a 3 game losing streak. After a close lose to BFM, the Bluebirds have spiraled with back to back to back losses to the Pimps, Ice & Fire and Berlin. With Dallas, both London teams, Lyon and Stockholm left on the schedule things don’t look to be getting any better. Still, the Bluebirds have shown some teeth. HB Johnny Nitro has been brilliant racking up 1,556 yards and 15 TDs while leading Cardiff to the 9th ranked rushing offense in WEPL. Relegation is not a fear here, for the Bluebirds they should be focused on tweaking the talent they have and preparing to make a serious playoff run in Season 9.
14. Edinburgh Black Knights (2-8):
The Black Knights join Lyon and PPP as the most disappointing teams in Season 8. After a strong Season 7, many expected the Black Knights to be strong playoff contenders throughout the year. While the Black Knights have been in nearly every game they’ve played thus far this year – close isn’t good enough for this team who had title aspirations in the pre-season. The team’s 10th ranked defense and 13th ranked offense despite a 2-8 record is a testament to how close the Black Knights have come to turning things around. This should serve as a warning to the final 6 teams on the Black Knights’ schedule. I wouldn’t be surprised to see the Knights pull off a major upset or two in the coming weeks.
15. PPP Longnecks (1-9):
After overhauling the front office, PPP Owner Vabills purged many of his team’s stalwarts and has since been trying to rebuild the Longnecks. The road has been rough as they have been on the wrong side of more blowouts this year than ever before in their rich history. Even Week 11’s rivalry game against the Meatballs can’t do too much to restore the luster for the Longnecks. A serious rebuilding effort in both personnel and tactics needs to be undertaken before the Longnecks can crawl out of the basement. With a brutal schedule to finish the year, relegation appears to be a certainty.
16. Sevilla Naranjas (0-10):
The Naranjas are heading for AAA in Season 9, but they should have their heads held high. Rather than taking the easy way out and folding the franchise, the front office of Sevilla is committed to rebuilding the team through free agency. It will be a long road for them, but as the Musketeers are showing in AAA – a quick return to WEPL is not out of the question.
Mid Season Pro-Bowl Team
Alpha:
QB: Steve Tarkenton (Philharmonics)
Tarkenton’s 120.8 QB rating leads Alpha and his 1,702 passing yards, 70% completion rating and 24 TDs is equally as impressive. However the most mind boggling stat is in 252 passes this season, Steve has 0 INTs. It also doesn’t hurt that he has Paris in line for a playoff birth as well.
HB: TJ Crimson (Dream Bolts)
A league leading 27 TDs as well as an Alpha leading 1,604 yards rushing with a 4.8 YPCA is the main reason why the Dream Bolts are 8-2 and in line for a Top 4 seed. Crimson has fumbled only once this year on 334 carries making him one of the more dependable backs in GLB.
HB: Jaquan-Juan Tomba (Dynamo)
With a 5 YPCA, 1,105 rushing yards, 19TDs and 0 Fumbles, Tomba has been the key to the Dynamo’s 7-3 start. He edges out Woodridge Joseph Ngo for the second spot in a very close race.
WR: Ellis Carver (Lumberjacks)
74 grabs for 791 yards and 9 TDs is impressive. 0 drops is even more impressive. Carver is a big play threat whenever he touches the ball, averaging almost 11 yards per reception.
WR: Joe Chang (Philharmonics)
54 grabs for 563 yards aren’t exactly all star numbers. But 12 TDs in 10 games is. Chang accounts for 50% of Tarkenton’s TDs and is a key reason for Paris being in the top half of the playoff picture.
WR: Moises Santana (Commandos)
Despite only grabbing 36 balls, Santana has made his presence felt with 7 TDs, 631 yards and an eye-popping 17.5 yards per reception average.
TE: Eddie Smith (Wrecking Crew)
With 52 catches for 522 yards and 3 TDs, Smith is Aberdeens leading passing threat. Plus, he blocks fairly well for a receiving TE.
OT: Brian Crusher (Dream Bolts)
161 Pancakes are rather relative. But being the anchor for a team that has only allowed 6 sacks all year is not.
OT: Jake Long (Dream Bolts)
104 Pancakes and the bookend for the best pass-blocking O-Line in Alpha.
OG: G Stcheng (Philharmonics)
A Conference high 176 pancake blocks while keeping Tarkenton upright.
OG: Langko Baby (Thunder)
131 Pancakes is impressive – being the best O-Linemen on the Thunder is even more so.
C: Celia Cipher (Philharmonics)
The man in the pivot for one of GLB’s better offensive lines has racked up the stats.
DE: Jimmy Johnston (Wrecking Crew)
97 tackles, 26 sacks, 9 hurries, 33 tackles for a loss, 2 PDs makes him not only a pro bowler but a DPOY candidate. If he can lead Aberdeen to the playoffs for the first time in 3 seasons he might just nab the MVP as well.
DE: Omnipotent Nihility (Philharmonic)
17 hurries 5 FFs and 16 sacks is nothing to sneeze at.
DT: Alex Panda (Perkis)
25 tackles, 23 hurries, 6 sacks, 4 FFs is impressive no matter what your team’s record.
DT: Leon (Lumberjacks)
43 Tackles, 7 hurries, 5 sacks, 1 PD and 1 INT make Leon a force to be reckoned with in the middle of the defense.
LB: Bell Ringer Rogers (Monarchs)
91 tackles, 5 hurries, 4 sacks, 8 TFL, 16 PDs and 3 INTs prove that Rogers can do it all. Of course when you’re on the field as much as the Monarch’s D is, you get lots of chances.
LB: Kamerlon Winbley (Dream Bolts)
65 tackles, 3 hurries, 4 sacks, 13 PDs and 1 INT on one of the league’s best LB corps.
LB: Horace Horsecollar (Commandos)
54 tackles, 15 PDs, 2 INTs have helped keep the Commandos in the playoff picture.
LB: Manny Mo (Black Watch)
72 Tackles, 1 hurry, 3 sacks, 10 PDs and 1 INT. Enough said.
CB: Wolfgang Mitermeyer (Philharmonic)
Wolfgang leads Alpha in picks with 5 plus has 31 tackles, 33 PDs and two INT return for TDs this year.
CB: Wild Rych (Dynamo)
41 tackles, 4 INTs and 22 PDs shows how effective Rych has been. He shuts down half the field and teams rarely throw on him.
CB: Champ Coladidis (Perkis)
3 INTs and counting this year, 2 of which were returned for TDs. Add on 33 Tackles and 33 PDs and you’re looking at an all star.
FS: Walter von Schenkopp (Philharmonic)
Walter rounds out an impressive crop of Paris all stars but his 41 tackles, 23 PDs, 3 INTs and 1 TD more qualify him to play centerfield in anyone’s defense.
SS: Oliver Tullock (E-City)
The closest race in all the positions, Tullock’s 61 tackles, 3 INTs, 2 FFs and 29 PDs gives Oliver the edge over his competition.
Zeta
QB: Dimitri Makarov (Ballers)
The best of his class in a down year for passers in Zeta. Makarov’s 2, 151 yards passing, 57% completion rating and 17 TDs has kept Berlin afloat in the playoff picture.
HB: Mal Brown (Meatballs)
Mal leads the league in nearly every rushing category with 1,917 yards, 23 TDs and a 4.7 YPCA. Plus, with 407 carries to date Mal has 0 fumbles making him the key to the Meatballs’ title hopes.
HB: Areo Hotah (Ice & Fire)
Hotah is nearly single handedly kept the Ice & Fire offense moving with his 1,667 yards and 17 TDs.
FB: Austin Wang (Meatballs)
Doesn’t have a single carry this year but paves the way for the league’s best rushing attack.
WR: Cliff Brighton (Rippers)
66 grabs for 1,097 yards and 7 TDs plus an impressive 16 yards per reception average is nothing compared to his 0 drops all year. The Rippers will go only as far as Brighton can carry them.
WR. Montgomery Brogan (Meatballs)
Despite playing for the power rushing Meatballs, Brogan has made his presence felt with 49 grabs for 625 yards and a conference high 7 TDs.
WR: Rod Tidwell (GRD)
58 grabs for 663 yards, 3 TDs and an 11.4 yards per reception average has him near the top of the class in every major receiving category.
TE: Kevin Atkinson (Destroyers)
The dynamic TE is second in the conference in receiving yards with 882. He also has snagged 2 TDs while finding time to block as well.
OT: Reggie Youngblood (Pimps)
A great anchor with 176 Pancakes.
OT: Johnny Forcefield (Meatballs)
The bookend for a team who has given up the least amount of sacks. He also paves the way for Mal Brown and company.
OG: Andre the Giant (BFM)
A league high 163 pancakes while anchoring the middle of one of Zeta’s best offensive lines.
OG: Corey Gaines (Meatballs)
The converted center routinely opens holes for the power rushing attack of Stockholm.
C: Snot Dangler (Meatballs)
Has manned the pivot for the Meatballs for nearly 8 years and is showing no signs of aging.
DE: Magnus Samuelsson (Ballers)
His 6 sacks are second in Zeta and he continues to be a force off the edge, despite Bort’s nerfs.
DE: Gut Maximus (Stockholm)
The former AAA DPOY has started to turn on the jets with 6 sacks this year.
DT: Sienna Miller (Ballers)
47 tackles, 10 hurries and 5 sacks have kept the Ballers in the hunt and Miller in our hearts.
DT: Force Trucks (Naranjas)
With 16 hurries, 6 sacks and 52 tackles, he’s the best player on a rebuilding team and has put up impressive numbers against good offensive lines.
LB: Blitz Smith (Rippers)
A league high 99 tackles, 2 sacks, 1 FF, 6 Hurries and 28 PDs has him in line for DPOY honors and the Rippers in line for a deep playoff run.
LB: Bobby Brooks (Black Knights)
Second in the conference with 73 tackles, 6 sacks, Brooks has also chipped in with 1 INT which he returned for a TD.
LB: Shade Tree (GRD)
52 Tackles, 2 Hurries, 3 PDs, 3 INTs, 1 FF has led the Divots to the upper echelon of Zeta clubs.
LB: Smash Jenkins (Rippers)
Outshined slightly by his teammate smith, Jenkins is among the league leaders in hurries (13) while piling up 71 tackles, 2 sacks and 17 PDs.
CB: Killswitch Engage (BFM)
Leading the conference with 8 sacks is impressive for a CB. The fact that he only has 19 tackles and 5 PDs proves that teams just don’t throw his way.
CB: Sticky F1ngaz (Dynasty)
Has 3 INTs, two of which he returned for TDs. Also has chipped in 26 tackles, 2 sacks and 12 PDs.
CB: Pat Monk (Meatballs)
13 tackles, 2 INTs and 14 PDs – he has shut down half the field for the Meatballs all season long.
FS: Pico De Gailo (Meatballs)
Part of the best FS/SS tandem in Zeta, Pico has 29 tackles, 3 INTs, 3 TDs and 5 PDs.
SS: CJ DeCoud (Meatballs)
His 51 tackles may not seem like that much, but its when he makes them that counts. 5 TFL, 4 Hurries and 4 PDs shows he’s flying around the ball. DeCoud is in the running for DPOY for the impact he’s made on the Meatballs defense.
MVP RACE
Alpha:
Steve Tarkenton (QB, Philharmonics)
TJ Crimson (HB, Dream Bolts)
Elis Carver (WR, WuJax)
Jimmy Johnston (DE, AWC)
Zeta:
Mal Brown (HB, Meatballs)
Cliff Brighton (WR, Rippers)
Millhouse McKenzie (HB, BFM)
Blitz Smith (LB, Rippers)
Offensive Player of the Year:
Alpha
Steve Tarkenton (QB)
TJ Crimson (HB)
Elis Carver (WR)
Juquan-Juan Tomba (HB)
Mario Stanfield (QB)
Zeta:
Mal Brown (HB)
Cliff Brighton (WR)
Millhouse McKenzie (HB)
Montgomery Brogan (WR)
Areo Hotah (HB)
Defensive Player of the Year:
Alpha:
Jimmy Johnston (DE)
Omnipotent Nihility (DE)
Oliver Tullock (SS)
Horace Horsecollar (LB)
Alex Panda (DT)
Zeta
Killswitch Engage (CB)
Shade Tree (LB)
Tex Willer (SS)
CJ DeCoud (SS)
Durn da Return (CB)
Last edited Mar 17, 2009 14:38:29
