Warrior General Games

With Jimo distracted by hos and HuskerNation basking in the glory of the "A" leagues, their power rankings have been sorely missed. A certain recently unemployed Texan has generously offered to step into the gap (at least for the Eastern Conference). Below are his pre-season power rankings, which the Secret Service delivered to me this morning directly from Crawford.

Shock and Awe
Richmond Empire should be the deciders in chief this season on the strength of the best backfield and the scariest defensive line in the league. This is a team Karl Rove could be proud of.

Axis of Evil
British Columbia Beasters are new to Da Seven, but intelligence indicates they may be developing weapons of mass destruction. Definitely part of the new world order.

Strategery
Torrington Wildcats finished just out of the conference elite last year. They've retained most of their strength and the majority of the teams they fell to last year have moved on. If Richmond or BC have ethical problems, Torrington is in line for a cabinet post.

Misunderestimated
Texas Presidents have just this to say: "Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we."

Mission Accomplished
Frostburg Bobcats round out the real contenders this season. Rarely is the questioned asked: Is our children learning? We'll find out for Frostburg this season.

Hanging Chads
Deimon Devil bats look impressive at first glance, but too many inexperienced players at key positions will leave them in a quagmire.

Hunting with Cheney
Killian's Irish Red start the season with a face full of buckshot. Unfortunately, they'll never have an opportunity to put together a nice streak, as their tough games are scattered about every three weeks through the season.

I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully.
And we're proving it right here in Da Seven. Currently numbered among the fish:

Texas Tech Big Red Spread - getting there slowly. Should be a contender in the first Clinton (Hillary) administration.

State College Cyclones - needs a recruiter. Exciting Quarterback throwing to a level 17 WR. State's defense promises to be about as effective as my economic policy.

Baton Rouge Bayou Bengals - too many players with less experience than Barack Obama.

Delray Manatees - climate change isn't doing the Manatees any good.

Minnesota Paladins - continuing a proud losing tradition. The Pals will be ready for prime time in the first Clinton (Chelsea) adminstration.

Crooklyn Bombers - principles matter. Crooklyn is dedicated to the principle of losing. I take my hat off to that.

Pahoa Wild Boars - erm? Where is Pahoa?

Alabama Anzacs - Australia is a key ally in the war on terror. So is Alabama.

Detroit Total Chaos - FEMA's on the way! Brownie, they've had another hurricane in Detroit!

You're not saying Killian's drew the short straw as far as the week 1 cross-conference game, are you?

But yeah, this is a nice writeup.

GM of Frostburg Bobcats checking in. A couple things.

1) Jack, much love for your avatar. Smash TV rules.

2) This is a good write-up, and I can understand our ranking to a degree - we lost our game last season against a team below us (Deimon) that we probably shouldn't have lost. However, we also beat Torrington and Texas Presidents, and only lost to Richmond by a single point. Not bitching about the ranking, because it's only a guided opinion - but don't sleep on Frostburg

I have no doubts that Richmond is the power in this conference. But with Houston and Lincoln and Jax Beach and Alamo City out of the way, it's wide open - and a clowder of Bobcats are on the prowl.

Originally posted by jroma1
Not bitching about the ranking, because it's only a guided opinion - but don't sleep on Frostburg

Could be. Nobody ever accused Dubya of being overly bright.

Loved the write-up. Although I don't have any players in the league anymore, the power ranking made me laugh. It was very entertaining... much like watching our former president attempt to sound intelligent. JRoma.... thanks for considering us among the elite of this league last season. We really did well, but I don't think we were ready for promotion out of the league. We could have been really tough in Da 7 this season.

these are 2 1 sided where the west stuff so shitty job half done we need full ranks like jimo did . For it to be true power ranks.

Excellent! Thanks for volunteering, XFactor. I'm sure you'll do a fantastic job on the power rankings for the West.

Yes, my thoughts exactly.

na your job to see thew finish what you started as i said your half done

Originally posted by XFactor
na your job to see thew finish what you started as i said your half done

Exactly what I said about invading Iraq!

Sorry, though. My mandate runs to my conference. If you westies want power rankings, you're gonna have to do 'em yourselves.

lol thanks grey for steppin up to do these.. i think he'll do a good job.. and no worries..jack does a great job withthe west

however.. jimo is still bringing something to the table

I don't do so well with team rankings; my stuff mainly deals with game predictions themselves. Guess I should get started on that soon, huh?

I think British Columbia is gonna be a sleeper team in the east.

Erm, I think a "sleeper" is someone who far exceeds expectations. I ranked BC number two. Hard for them to be a sleeper. Now if Detroit wins the conference (or even a game), you can call them a sleeper!

I can give them a shot for the west. Not preseason rankings though, maybe after week 1 or week 2.